THE 


PROBLEM  OF  LIFE, 

OR 

RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY 
IN  GERMANY. 

33  Y 

HENRY   W.  CARSTENS, 


BOSTON  AND  CAMBRIDGE: 
JAMES  MUNROE  AND  COMPANY. 
1  8  5  8. 


Entered  according  to  the  act  of  Congress,  in  the  year  1858, 

Br  Henry  W.  Carstens, 
In  the  Clerk's  Office  of  the  District  Court  of  Massachusetts. 


HENRY  J.  HOWLAND,  PRINTER,  WORCESTER. 


THE  PEOBLEM  OF  LIFE. 


CHAPTER,  I. 

GENERAL  REMARKS  ON  RELIGION. 

Among  the  many  treasures  which  the  German 
literature  offers  to  us,  there  is  one  which  has  always 
been  particularly  attractive  to  me — a  drama,  called 
Nathan  the  Sage,  written  by  the  celebrated  Lessing. 
The  principal  characters  in  this  piece  are  three  good 
men ;  Sultan  Saladin,  a  Mohammedan,  Nathan,  a  Jew, 
and  a  young  Temple-Knight,  a  Christian. 

Lessing  not  only  reminds  us  by  the  whole  piece  in 
general,  of  the  fact  that  there  are  good  men  to  be 
found  among  the  adherents  of  all  the  different  creeds  ; 
he  also  gives  us  his  opinion  about  these  creeds  them- 
selves, and  their  relative  value.  The  3d  act  contains 
a  dialogue  between  Saladin  and  Nathan,  where  the 
former  asks  the  latter  which  religion  he  thinks  is 
the  best?  Nathan  answers  the  question  by  the  fol- 
lowing story. 

Many  centuries  ago,  there  lived  in  the  East  a  man 
who  possessed  a  ring  of  an  inestimable  value.  It 


4  THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 

was  adorned  with  a  precious  stone,  which  glittered 
with  a  hundred  beautiful  colors,  and  had  the  hidden 
power  of  making  acceptable  before  God  and  man 
whoever  wore  it,  with  the  belief  that  it  would  do  so. 
No  wonder,  therefore,  that  the  man  never  left  it  off 
his  finger,  and  that  he  made  arrangements  which 
would  be  likely  to  keep  it  forever  in  his  family.  He 
left  the  ring  to  the  most  beloved  of  his  sons,  and 
ordained  that  this  son,  in  his  turn,  should  bequeath 
it  to  the  one  he  liked  best  among  his  sons,  and  thus 
in  succession,  the  most  beloved  always  should  become 
the  chief,  the  head  of  the  family,  alone  by  virtue  of 
the  ring. 

Thus  the  ring  devolved,  from  son  to  son,  at  last 
on  one  who  was  father  of  three  sons,  all  of  whom 
were  equally  obedient  to  him,  and  whom  he,  there- 
fore, could  not  help  loving  equally.  Yet  from  time 
to  time,  now  the  one,  then  the  other,  and  then  the 
third,  seemed  to  him  to  be  most  worthy  of  the  ring, 
just  as  each  was  alone  with  him,  and  as  the  other  two 
did  not  share  in  the  overflowings  of  his  heart.  He  had 
the  tender  weakness  to  promise  the  ring  to  each  of 
them. 

This  would  do  as  long  as  things  went  their  even 
course ;  but  the  time  of  death  arrived,  and  the  father 
was  placed  in  a  great  dilemma.  It  would  have 
grieved  him  to  disappoint  two  of  his  sons  who  de- 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  5 

pended  upon  his  word.  What  was  he  to  do?  He 
secretly  sends  for  an  artist,  and  orders,  after  the  pat- 
tern of  his  ring,  two  other  ones,  and  desires  that 
neither  expense  nor  pains  should  he  spared  to  make 
them  perfectly  like  the  former.  The  artist  succeeds. 
As  he  hrings  them,  the  father  himself  cannot  distin- 
guish the  original  ring.  Full  of  joy  he  calls  his 
sons,  each  separately  ;  he  gives  to  each  separately 
his  "blessing  and  his  ring,  and — dies. 

Hardly  has  the  father  died,  when  each  son  comes 
with  his  ring,  and  desires  to  be  the  chief  of  the  fam- 
ily. They  make  inquiries,  they  quarrel,  they  com- 
plain of  each  other.  All  is  in  vain  ;  they  cannot  prove 
which  ring  is  the  right  one,  as  little  as  we  now,  which 
faith  is  the  right  one. 

The  sons  went  to  law,  and  each  swore  before  the 
judge  that  he  had  received  his  ring  directly  from  his 
father's  hand — which  was  true — after  having  been 
promised  long  ago,  that  he,  one  of  these-  days,  should 
enjoy  the  prerogative  of  the  ring — which  was  no  less 
true !  Each  one  asserted  that  his  father  could  not 
have  been  faithless  towards  him,  and  rather  than  to 
allow  such  a  thing  to  be  suspected  of  so  dear  a  father, 
he  would  be  obliged  to  accuse  his  brothers  of  foul  play, 
however  willing  he  otherwise  might  be  to  think  the 
best  of  them  ;  however,  he  would  know  how  to  unmask 
the  traitors,  and  how  to  take  vengeance  on  them. 


6 


THE  PROBLEM  OP  LIFE,  OR 


The  Judge  said :  "  If  you  do  not  soon  bring  your 
father  before  me,  I  shall  send  you  away  from  my 
tribunal.    Do  you  think  I  am  here  to  solve  riddles  ? 
Or  do  you  expect  the  right  ring  to  speak?    But  stop! 
I  understand  that  the  right  ring  possesses  the  mirac- 
ulous power  of  making  any  one  beloved,  acceptable 
before  God  and  men.    This  must  decide,  for  the  false 
rings  will  not  be  able  to  do  that !    Now,  whom  is  it 
that  two  of  you  like  best  ?    Make  haste,  tell  me ! 
What,  you  are  silent  ?    Have  the  rings  only  an  influ- 
ence upon  their  owners,  and  not  upon  others  ?  Does 
each  of  you  love  himself  the  most  ?    Oh,  then  you 
are  all  three  deceived  deceivers !    Not  one  of  the 
three  rings  is  genuine.    The  original  ring  probably 
was  lost.    In  order  to  conceal  the  loss,  and  to  make 
up  for  it,  the  father  had  three  rings  made  instead  of 
one.    And  therefore,"  continued  the  Judge,  "  unless 
you  wish  for  my  counsel  instead  of  my  verdict,  I  bid 
you,  be  gone  !    My  advice,  however,  is  this  ;  take  the 
affair  exactly  as  it  is.    If  each  of  you  has  received 
his  ring  from  his  father,  then  let  each  one  firmly  be- 
lieve that  his  ring  is  the  genuine  one.    It  is  possible 
that  the  father  intended  no  longer  to  tolerate  in  his 
family  the  tyranny  of  that  one  ring !    And  I  am 
sure  he  loved  you  all  three,  loved  you  equally,  and 
did  not  wish  to  oppress  two  of  you  for  the  sake  of 
favoring  one." 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY. 


7 


"  Well  then,  let  each  of  you  strive  for  being  loved, 
unbiased,  free  of  all  prejudice  !  Let  each  one  rival 
with  the  others  in  endeavoring  to  bring  to  light  the 
power  of  the  stone  in  his  ring ;  let  him  aid  this  pow- 
er by  meekness,  by  heart-felt  tolerance,  by  charity, 
by  a  confiding  reliance  upon  his  God.  And  if  the 
power  of  the  stones  should  become  apparent  among 
the  children  of  your  children's  children,  then  I  will 
summon  them  again  before  my  chair,  thousands  of 
thousand  years  hence.  Then  a  man,  wiser  than  I, 
will  sit  on  this  chair,  and  will  pronounce  judgment. 
Go  now  I"    Thus  spoke  the  modest  judge. 

This  story,  necessarily,  must  lose  a  great  deal  of 
its  beauty  by  being  translated  into  another  language, 
by  being  deprived  of  its  poetical  form,  and  severed 
from  the  remainder  of  the  drama.  Those  of  my 
readers  who  have  seen  it,  or  can  enjoy  it  in  the  origi- 
nal, will  be  likely  to  compare  my  version  of  it  to  a 
diamond,  which  has  lost  a  great  deal  of  its  splendor 
by  having  its  polished  surface  tarnished  and  broken, 
and  by  being  taken  out  of  a  diadem  whose  principal 
ornament  it  was.  Still,  I  doubt  not  the  story,  even 
thus,  appears  to  the  reader  exceedingly  beautiful.  I 
have  read  it  repeatedly,  and  have  always  found  new 
attractions  in  it. 

There  is  only  one  instance,  it  seems  to  me,  where 
the  essence  of  religion  is  so  clearly  pointed  out,  and 


8 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LTFE,  OR 


so  accurately  defined,  as  in  this  story.  I  mean  the 
words  of  Christ :  "  Love  the  Lord  thy  God,  with  all 
thy  heart,  with  all  thy  soul,  with  all  thy  strength, 
and  with  all  thy  mind  :  and  thy  neighbor  as  thyself." 
These  words  are  so  sublime  in  their  simplicity  and 
comprehensiveness,  that  we  cannot  conceive  of  any- 
thing so  impressive  as  they  are  to  a  mind  fully  im- 
bued with  the  spirit  of  Christianity.  But  as  we  are 
not  all  so  easily  moved  by  a  few  words,  and  as  we 
are  all  in  need  of  having  our  feelings  awakened  and 
developed  by  human  and  terrestial  affairs,  events  and 
impressions,  it  is  well  for  us  at  different  times  to 
have  the  same  truth  conveyed  to  our  minds  in  differ- 
ent ways,  and  for  this  reason  I  like  to  consider  Les- 
sing's  story,  as  a  worthy  illustration  and  corollary  of 
Christ's  all-comprehending,  simple  words.  Since  the 
contemplation  of  this  story  leads  me  most  directly 
to  the  object  I  have  in  view,  I  will  give  a  few  reasons 
why  I  consider  it  so  beautiful. 

First,  it  expresses  symbolically  the  idea,  that  no 
human  being  knows  or  possesses  truth  in  the  abstract, 
or,  as  we  may  call  it,  "  the  true  religion." 

I  will  not,  here  in  the  beginning,  shock  any  one's 
feelings  by  misleading  him  to  think  that  I  doubt 
whether  Christianity  is  the  true  religion.  No,  I  be- 
lieve that  the  essence  of  Christianity  is  true,  but  it 
is  doubtful  to  me  whether  there  is  any  sect  or  de- 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY. 


g 


nomination  in  existence,  which  has  not  added  some- 
thing human,  perishable  and  erroneous,  to  the  simple 
christian  truth.  And  even  if  we  divest  the  latter  of 
all  erroneous  additions,  even  then  we  are  not  allowed 
to  think  we  possess  truth  in  the  abstract.  Man,  from 
his  very  nature  as  a  finite  being,  never  can  compre- 
hend abstract,  infinite  truth.  For  instance,  man  can 
never  comprehend  the  essence  of  the  Deity.  There 
may  be  many  who  believe  they  have  the  right  idea 
of  God,  who  He  is  and  what  He  is,  but  they  substitute 
a  fancy,  a  semblance  for  the  reality ;  they  have  not 
the  power  of  thinking,  free  from  the  influence  of  im- 
bibed and  current  impressions. 

Any  one  who  has  learned  to  seek  God,  to  seek  God 
himself,  not  through  the  medium  of  accepted  creeds, 
but  in  his  own  soul,  and  in  the  universe  around  him, 
he  truly  finds  God  ;  his  belief  in  the  existence  of 
the  divine  being  is  better  founded,  more  ennobling, 
more  fructifying  than  the  current  belief,  which  is 
merely  transmitted  from  man  to  man.  Still,  the 
more  his  mind  is  confirmed  in  the  belief  in  God,  and 
the  more  his  heart  is  filled  with  holy  adoration  of 
God,  the  more  he  will  be  convinced  of  never  being 
able  to  comprehend  the  essence  of  the  Deity,  to  com- 
prehend that  spirit  which  manifests  itself  in  the  uni- 
verse and  in  man's  soul,  as  infinite  in  power,  wisdom 
and  love. 


10 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


Further,  we  cannot  arrive  at  the  abstract  truth 
concerning  the  universe.  We  never  can  comprehend 
the  infinitude  of  space.  If  space  is  a  reality,  meas- 
urement must  he  a  reality,  and  both,  in  fact,  seem  to 
us  to  he  real ;  we  cannot  consider  these  ideas  as  mere 
fancies,  since  our  senses  prove  them  to  us  as  facts. 
Still  we  cannot  reconcile  the  ideas  of  space  and  infin- 
itude, because  we  cannot  fathom  the  idea  of  going 
on  measuring  space  without  an  end.  What  is  there 
beyond  the  remotest  nebula  which  we  discover  through 
the  telescope,  or  which  we  imagine  to  see  with  our 
mind's  eye  ?  Empty  space  ?  What  is  empty  space  ? 
What  is  empty  space  without  limits  ?  I  am  sure,  no 
human  being  ever  will  answer  these  questions.  Space 
and  infinitude  are  two  ideas  which  a  human  mind 
cannot  reconcile  to  each  other.  Still,  the  mind  can- 
not divest  itself  of  either  of  these  two  ideas,  and 
must,  therefore,  acknowledge  that  there  is  something 
which  is  beyond  his  comprehension. 

The  same  is  true  in  regard  to  infinitude  of  time. 
Generation  after  generation,  everybody  talks  of  God 
as  an  eternal  being,  of  man's  soul  as  an  immortal 
and  eternal  spirit — they  speak  of  it,  as  of  the  sim- 
plest thing,  as  if  they  understood  all  about  it — and 
still,  as  soon  as  one  really  investigates  these  ideas  of 
eternity  and  immortality,  he  will  be  obliged  to  con- 
fess that  he  cannot  fathom  them.    Time  is  an  idea 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY. 


11 


of  which  we  cannot  divest  ourselves,  and  yet,  the 
expression  "  infinite  time "  has  no  comprehensible 
meaning  in  it.  We  cannot  comprehend  what  it 
means,  "  God  never  had  a  beginning."  We  cannot 
comprehend  that  the  world  could  have  been  created 
out  of  nothing  a  definite  number  of  years  ago,  and 
that  God  should  have  existed  before  the  world,  alone 
and  from  eternity.  We  cannot  comprehend  how  the 
divine  spirit,  or  any  spirit,  should  exist  entirely  dis- 
connected from  matter. 

On  the  other  hand,  if  we  consider  the  material 
world  as  co-existing  with  the  Deity,  and  therefore  as 
eternal,  we  have  no  more  a  definite  idea  of  a  world 
without  a  beginning,  than  of  a  Deity  without  a  be- 
ginning. And  if  we  turn  to  the  future,  we  find  the 
same  difficulty.  We  may  count  ever  so  far  by  years 
or  by  millions  of  years,  we  never  come  nearer  the 
end  of  time ;  we  cannot  „find  an  end,  and  still  we 
cannot  comprehend  what  it  means,  "  there  is  no  end." 
Of  the  idea  of  time  which  is  forced  upon  us  by  our 
senses,  we  cannot  rid  ourselves,  but  we  cannot  recon- 
cile the  word  "  infinite"  to  it,  and  therefore  no  man 
can  ever  comprehend  the  meaning  of  the  word  eter- 
nity. 

But  we  need  not  lose  ourselves  in  the  labyrinth  of 
these  vast  ideas,  in  order  to  be  convinced  that  we 
never  can  arrive  at  abstract  truth. 


12 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


If  we  study  geology,  and  try  to  investigate  what 
lias  been  the  original  shape  and  condition  of  the 
earth  ;  how  many  and  how  long  periods  of  develop- 
ment this  globe  has  gone  through  ;  how  the  revolu- 
tions it  was  subject  to,  were  brought  about,  and  how 
they  terminated ;  what  will  be  the  next  change  the 
earth  will  undergo ;  what  is  the  tendency  and  the 
final  destiny  of  this  and  of  other  planets, — if  we  inves- 
tigate these  and  many  other  similar  and  connected 
subjects,  we  shall  get  delightful  glimpses,  so  to  say, 
into  the  workshop  of  the  Almighty ;  we  shall  be 
filled  with  wonder  and  awe,  and  shall  bow  down  in 
adoration  before  the  Creator ;  but  we  shall  have  to 
confess  that  we  only  try  to  follow  his  footprints,  but 
can  never  hope  fully  to  trace  whither  he  tends,  and 
what  aim  he  will  finally  reach. 

If  we  study  mineralogy,  we  can  notice  and  admire 
the  laws  of  crystallization  and  other  similar  objects, 
but  we  never  shall  be  able  to  find  out  why  these 
things  are  as  they  are,  and  what  their  essence  is. 

If  we  study  botany,  it  will  reveal  to  us  the  wonders 
of  vegetation  ;  we  shall  be  enraptured  by  the  beauty 
and  variety,  and  the  many  thousand  combinations 
of  shape  and  color;  we  shall  admire  the  wondrous 
mode  of  propagation,  the  numerical,  and,  so  to  say, 
artistic  regularity  upon  which  the  classification  de- 
pends— all  tliis .  anH  many  other  observations  will 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  13 


convince  us  that  the  Creator  is  a  most  powerful  and 
benevolent  being, — but  after  all,  we  cannot  really 
comprehend  much  about  it.  We  do  not  know  whether 
all  those  plants  originated  according  to  invariable 
laws,  or  whether  each  species  was  created  by  an  in- 
dependent, momentary  will  and  act  of  the  Creator  ; 
we  do  not  know  why  there  is  such  a  profusion  of  va- 
riety and  of  beauty;  what  is  the  use  and  destination 
of  each  species  and  of  each  individual  plant.  There 
is  evidently  a  higher  purpose  in  them,  than  merely 
to  be  "  of  use  to  man  and  beast,"  or  even  "  to  glad- 
den  man's  heart."  But  this  and  many  other  things 
concerning  the  vegetable  kingdom,  man  never  will 
fully  comprehend. 

The  same  remark  is  applicable  to  the  study  of 
zoology.  If  we  closely  observe  and  study  all  the 
various  kinds  of  animals  around  us,  we  find  that  an 
inexhaustible  source  of  delight  and  admiration  i3 
opened  to  us,  and  that  here,  even  more  beautifully 
than  in  vegetable  life,  the  evidences  of  the  Creator's 
power,  wisdom  and  benevolence  are  laid  open  before 
us.  If  we  watch  the  birds,  what  a  joyous,  privileged 
race  do  they  seem  to  be  !  How  they  seem  to  enjoy 
their  own  singing  ;  for  if  they  did  not,  they  would 
not  repeat  the  same  few  sounds  day  after  day,  thous- 
ands of  times  !  How  gracefully  and  lightly  they 
move  about,  flitting  through  the  air,  an  element  in 


14 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


which  man  has  only  learned  clumsily,  rarely  and  im- 
perfectly to  move  by  the  means  of  a  balloon !  Really, 
I  have  often  wondered  why  the  Creator  had  endowed 
the  birds  almost  exclusively  with  the  capacity  and 
facility  of  choosing,  for  the  winter  and  for  the  sum- 
mer, a  congenial  climate  ;  why  He,  on  the  whole,  be- 
stowed so  much  of  his  bounteous  care  just  on  the 
birds.  I  have  often  thought,  if  I  did  not  rejoice  in 
being  a  man,  I  should  like  to  be  a  bird. 

Then  if  we  watch  the  multitude  of  insects,  how  won- 
drous do  they  appear !  If  we  had  never  noticed 
anything  about  them,  except,  for  instance,  a  spider 
weaving  his  net  in  the  field,  this  alone  would  be 
enough  to  fill  our  minds  with  wonder.  But  now, 
though  we  learn  all  these  facts,  and  though  this 
knowledge  has  a  very  salutary  influence  upon  us, 
what  do  we  really  know  about  most  of  the  animals? 
Nothing  but  their  existence,  their  appearances,  changes, 
&c.  Why  they  are  what  and  as  they  are,  and  how 
they  happened  to  be  so,  about  all  this  we  know  ab- 
solutely nothing. 

Many  a  time  have  I  tried  to  penetrate  to  the  foun- 
dation of  important  facts  and  of  trifles ;  for  instance, 
how  do  birds  know,  long  before  winter  or  summer 
really  approaches,  that  they  have  to  go  either  north 
or  south,  and  how  do  they  know  in  what  direction 
they  have  to  travel?    How  does  the  spider  know 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  15 


beforehand  whether  the  weather  will  be  good  or  not> 
so  as  to  make  it  advisable  to  weave  either  a  large 
and  substantial,  or  a  small  and  imperfect  net  ?  Why- 
has  this  butterfly  just  these  beautiful  spots  and  de- 
signs on  its  wings?  Why  has  that  bug  just  such  a 
horn  on  its  head  ?  Why  is  there  so  great  a  variety 
of  species  of  animals,  and  why  do  just  those  exist 
that  do  exist  ?  What  is  their  destiny  ?  All  such 
questions  allude  to  things  which  we  never  can  com- 
prehend. All  we  know  consists  in  phenomena,  in 
facts,  perhaps  in  facts  so  invariably  repeated  and 
established,  that  we  allow  ourselves  to  call  their  order 
and  routine,  natural  laws.  But  the  essence  and  the 
foundation  of  these  phenomena  and  laws  we  never 
can  comprehend. 

Much  less  than  these  can  we  hope  ever  fully  to 
understand  what  we  call  imponderable  agents  :  heat, 
light,  electricity,  magnetism,  gravitation,  &c.  I  think 
there  is  an  infinite  charm  in  trying  to  become  ac- 
quainted with  the  phenomena  produced  by  these 
powers,  in  trying  to  trace  and  to  establish  the  laws 
upon  which  they  act,  and  in  making  them  servicea- 
ble to  man's  will  and  purposes.  Still  here  again, 
these  agents  themselves,  their  origin,  essence,  vitality 
and  destiny  are  beyond  our  comprehension. 

As  much,  or  perhaps  more  mysterious  than  all  I  have 
as  far  as  now  alluded  to,  is  the  power  which  produces 


16 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


the  phenomena  we  learn  and  apply  in  chemistry. 
"What  is  the  way  in  which  two  or  more  simple  sub- 
stances form  a  new  chemical  compound  ?  What  real 
meaning  can  we  attach  to  the  theory  of  atoms  ? 
"Why  do  some  substances  chemically  attract,  and  why 
do  others  repel  each  other?  Why  do  some  substances 
combine  in  the  proportion  of  one  to  eight,  and  others 
in  other  proportions?  The  facts  are  known,  but  these 
questions  concerning  their  origin,  &c,  will  never  be 
solved  by  man. 

Quite  as  wonderful  and  mysterious  as  anything  I 
have  mentioned,  is  to  us  our  own  self.  If  we  study 
anthropology  and  the  physiology  of  man,  we  meet 
with  more  enrapturing  proofs  of  God's  wisdom,  power 
and  goodness,  than  in  the  study  of  zoology  ;  but  at 
the  same  time  with  more  perplexing  and  irresolulle 
questions.  Not  only  are  the  origin,  propagation  and 
development  of  man  as  a  corporal  being  meie  facts 
to  us,  ^explained  in  their  essence,  but  ev<  n  less 
than  these  can  we  comprehend  a  host  of  singularities. 
Who  can,  for  instance,  explain  the  resemblance  we 
find  in  the  faces  of  different  individuals,  and  on  the 
other  hand  the  almost  total  absence  of  a  real,  perfect 
likeness  between  any  two  faces?  the  origin  and  de- 
velopment of  cutaneous  and  many  other  diseases? 
the  circumstance  that  the  hands  and  feet  of  the  mem- 
bers and  generations  of  some  families  have  six  fin- 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY. 


17 


gers  and  six  toes  ;  the  existence  of  moles  and  other 
peculiarities  of  that  kind  ? 

If  we  contemplate  man  as  a  rational  being,  and 
enter  into  the  labyrinth  of  psychology,  perplexing 
questions  crowd  in  upon  us  from  all  sides.  First,  we 
can  arrive  at  the  certainty  that  we  have  a  soul,  a 
mind,  a  spirit ;  but  the  essence  of  this  being  we  can- 
not comprehend  in  the  least.  We  cannot  even  form 
a  definite  idea  of  its  qualities  and  functions.  How 
is  it  that  our  mind  remembers  anything  ?  Why  is 
the  memory  of  some  persons  quick,  that  of  others 
tenacious  ?  Why  do  we  sometimes  suddenly  and  in- 
voluntarily remember  a  thing,  which  shortly  before 
we  were  entirely  unable  to  recall?  Why  are  some 
persons  entirely  destitute  of  musical  talent,  though 
their  physical  ear  seems  to  be  as  perfect  as  that  of 
any  great  musician  ? 

When  is  a  child's  mind  so  far  developed  that  we 
can  say  "  this  is  the  moment  when  the  chr  1  begins 
to  be  a  rational  being  ?';  Is  man  an  accountable 
being  as  soon  as  he  is  to  be  considered  a  rational 
being?  If  not,  when  does  his  accountability  begin? 
What  becomes  of  a  person's  mind  in  second  child- 
hood? What  is  the  origin  of  madness  and  what  is 
madness  in  itself?  What  influence  does  it  have  on 
man's  rational  and  moral  worth,  and  on  his  rights 
and  duties  in  his  relations  to  his  fellow-men,  to  the 
2 


18 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


universe,  and  to  its  God  ?  What  is  the  nature  of 
the  process  of  falling  asleep  and  of  awaking? 
What  is  sleep  itself  and  the  state  of  the  soul  during 
sleep  ?  What  are  dreams  and  what  is  their  connec- 
tion with  man's  character  and  destiny  ?  In  what 
way  is  our  soul  connected  with  our  body,  and  what  is 
the  essence  of  the  influence  it  exerts  on  the  latter  ? 
How  far  is  the  body  under  the  control  of  the  mind  ? 
Where  is  the  exact  boundary  line  between  the  mind's 
activeness  and  passiveness,  and  consequently  the 
boundary  between  man's  accountability  and  unac- 
countableness  ?  What  is  the  nature  of  the  separa- 
tion of  body  and  mind,  and  its  effects  on  the  latter  ? 
What  is  really  the  destiny  of  any  individual  as  well 
as  of  the  whole  human  race  ?  Why  was  there  ever 
such  an  episode  in  the  history  and  development  of 
the  human  race,  as  that,  for  instance,  which  Lamar- 
tine  so  forcibly  and  vividly  details  to  us  in  his  his- 
tory "  des  Girondins "?  Why  did  God  create  just 
such  an  incomprehensible  compound  of  matter  and 
of  spirit,  as  man  on  investigation  proves  to  be  ? 

I  might  add  more  such  questions,  but  I  suppose 
those  expressed  are  sufficient  to  prove  what  I  wished 
to  establish,  as  an  important  truth,  viz.,  that  any 
one  who  tries  thoroughly  to  investigate  the  physical 
and  spiritual  world,  will  find  that  there  are  many, 
many  things  which  he  has  to  acknowledge  as  facts, 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  19 


but  which  he  cannot  fully  comprehend.  Perhaps 
there  are  many  persons  who  have  some  answers  ready, 
which,  as  they  think,  settle  some  of  the  above  matters 
very  satisfactorily,  but  it  is  my  conviction  that  their 
answers  will  only  satisfy  those  persons  who  believe 
they  think,  but  do  not  think. 

This  may  seem  a  paradox  to  many,  but  real  think- 
ers will  appreciate  this  remark.  The  world,  in  this 
respect,  is  the  same  now  as  it  was  at  the  time  of  So- 
crates. Eeal  thinkers  only  can  reach  that  state  of 
rational  and  moral  circumspection,  which  leads  them 
to  declare  that  they  love  and  seek  the  truth,  (that 
they  are  philosophers,)  but  that  there  are  many,  many 
things  which  are  beyond  their  comprehension. 

There  are  persons,  (and  this  class  of  men  is  very 
large,)  who  believe  themselves  to  be  thinkers,  but 
who  are  no  thinkers  in  reality.  And  these  persons 
are  always  in  danger  of  believing  things  which  are 
not  beyond  their  comprehension,  but  against  their  con- 
viction, against  common  sense.  Their  minds  are  far 
enough  developed  to  receive  ideas,  and  often  they 
really  understand  these  ideas ;  but  mistaking  the 
mental  function  of  understanding  for  comprehending, 
they  believe  they  do  comprehend,  where  they  only  un- 
derstand. That  is,  they  have  some  vague  idea,  or 
even  a  clear  perception  of  the  literal  meaning  of  the 
words  they  hear  or  read,  but  they  have  not  the  fac- 


20 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


ulty  within  themselves,  independently  to  investigate 
whether  the  idea  they  receive,  is  true  or  not.  They 
have  some  preconceived  riotions  which  they  have  im- 
bibed by  education,  by  tradition,  or  by  other  external 
influences,  unwillingly  and  unwittingly.  Everything 
that  agrees  with  these  preconceived  notions,  they 
consider  as  true,  everything  that  comes  in  collision 
with  them,  as  false.  But  whether  those  precon- 
ceived notions  are  true  or  false,  whether,  therefore, 
this  standard  of  their's,  of  truth  and  falsehood,  is  a 
reliable  and  infallible  guide — this  they  have  never 
investigated.  Thus  they  believe  they  think,  but 
really  do  not  think  themselves  ;  we  might  say,  it  is 
only  their  authority — their  living  or  departed  guide — 
that  thinks  through  them. 

We  may  here  mention  that  this  fact  is  the  reason 
why  error  is  so  easily  propagated  ;  this  fact  explains 
the  existence  of  so  much  falsehood  and  wrong,  of  so 
many  lamentable  and  prejudicial  actions,  events,  hab- 
its, institutions  and  laws.  For  we  ourselves  must  be 
either  very  wicked  or  very  shortsighted  and  narrow- 
minded,  if  we  believe  all  misfortunes  and  wrongs  on 
this  globe  to  be  produced  by  the  wickedness  and 
malice,  or  the  demoniac  spirit  of  man.  No,  by 
far  the  greater  amount  of  evil  is  the  consequence 
of  man's  blindness ;  much  evil  exists  only  because 
so  many  human  beings  do  not  think  at  all,  and 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  21 


because  so  many  believe  they  think,  but  do  not 
think. 

If  we  could  all  at  once  remove  from  the  physical 
and  moral  world,  all  that  is  produced  by  man's  ig- 
norance, delusion  and  blind  belief,  there  would  not 
be  much  left  to  complain  of,  and  those  evils  which 
then  might  remain,  would  lose  their  principal  sup- 
port and  would  also  vanish  by  degrees.  Wicked  men 
would  not  find  any  field  for  their  wicked  activity  and 
influence,  if  they  had  not  the  ignorance  and  credulity 
of  millions  of  fellow-men  to  speculate  upon. 

There  is  another  class  of  men  whom  we  might  call 
half-thinkers.  They  have  been  fortunate  enough  to 
disenthral  themselves  from  the  dominion  of  outward 
authority,  of  inherited  and  communicated  belief. 
They  have  succeeded  in  examining  what  was  recom- 
mended to  them  and  urged  upon  them  as  worthy  of 
belief,  and  they  have  rejected  everything  that  was 
contradictory  to  their  unbiased  and  uncorrupted 
judgment  and  common  sense.  But  they  only  suc- 
ceeded in  pulling  down  what  they  found  to  be  erro- 
neous ;  the  insufficient  development  of  their  mental 
faculties,  their  want  of  knowledge  concerning  the 
physical  and  spiritual  world,  perhaps  even  the  per- 
version of  their  hearts,  were  such  as  to  prevent  them 
from  penetrating  to  a  higher  sphere  ;  they  would 
not  acknowledge  that  there  are  things  which  are  be- 


22 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR. 


yond  their  comprehension  and  which  they  would  have 
to  believe  on  the  strength  of  their  being  facts,  un- 
deniable and  irrefutable  facts. 

The  consequence  is  that  such  persons  remain  scep- 
tics. If  their  state  of  mind  is  the  result  of  a  sincere 
search  for  truth  and  not  of  a  desire  to  free  themselves 
of  moral  obligations,  their  condition  is  a  credit  and 
an  honor  to  them,  and  is  by  far  more  valuable 
in  the  sight  of  God  and  of  true  men,  than  blind  be- 
lief ;  still  it  always  is  a  lamentable  one,  for  they 
often  taste  only  the  bitterness  of  life.  I  cannot  but 
think  that  Schiller  had  this  in  view  when  he  said 
"  Error  only  is  life,  and  knowledge  is  death."  I 
hardly  know  of  any  one  whom  I  pity  more  and  whom 
I  should  more  strongly  wish  to  assist,  than  a  sincere 
sceptic  who  is  not  able  to  emerge  from  his  bewil- 
dered and  obscured  state  of  mind  to  a  serene  and 
trustful  faith.  I  say  faith  and  not  knowledge,  because 
as  I  said  before,  it  is  not  given  to  man  ever  to  arrive 
at  the  abstract  truth. 

I  have  tried  to  elucidate  this  fact  in  a  somewhat 
lengthy  way,  because  I  attach  the  utmost  importance 
to  it.  I  consider  it  the  fundamental  principle  upon 
which,  in  doubtful  cases,  our  final  happiness  depends. 
A  right  view  of  truth  in  the  abstract  is  the  only 
thing  which  in  the  hours  of  trial  and  temptation  can 
give  any  certainty,  stability  and  efficacy  to  our  re- 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  23 


ligions  views  and  feelings,  and  all  the  minor  subjects 
I  have  alluded  to,  are,  therefore,  more  closely  con- 
nected with  the  great  subject  under  contemplation, 
than  they  might  at  first  seem  to  be. 


n 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


CHAPTER  n. 

GENERAL  REMARKS  ON  RELIGIOUS  SECTS. 

I  can  now  return  to  speaking  of  my  subject  more 
directly.  By  proving  that  no  human  being  is  in  pos- 
session of  abstract  truth,  we  have  shown  how  much 
reason  Lessing  had  to  say  that  probably  no  one  of 
the  three  rings  was  genuine.  No  sect,  no  creed  does 
or  can  give  us  truth  in  the  abstract ;  the  only  thing 
they  ever  can  attain,  or  pretend  to  attain,  is  freedom 
from  error.  And  who  is  there  that  would  be  pre- 
sumptuous enough  to  say  that  his  mind  is  free  from 
error,  or  that  his  creed  is  the  pure  embodiment  of 
truth  ? 

Alas  !  this  question  is  not  the  right  one,  for  there 
are  only  too  many  who  are  presumptuous  enough  to 
think  and  to  say  so  without  being  enabled  by  their 
education,  their  mental  development,  their  experience 
and  their  fate  in  general,  to  form  an  opinion  inde- 
pendent of  outward  authority.  I  should  ask,  whom 
would  an  impartial  observer  think  to  be  free  from 
error?  The  answer  certainly  would  be,  very,  very 
few,  if  any.  Truth  when  coming  to  us  through  the 
channel  of  a  human  mind,  resembles  too  much  the 
pure  light  of  the  sun  which  reaches  our  eye  through 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY. 


25 


the  medium  of  the  atmosphere,  here  less,  there  more 
broken,  deflecting,  discolored,  dissolved,  but  never  in 
its  original  simplicity  and  purity.  And  even  if  we 
take  it  for  granted  that  Christ  was  the  embodiment 
of  pure,  abstract  truth,  to  how  many  christian  sects 
or  individuals  would  an  impartial  observer  grant  that 
they  have  not  distorted  and  confounded  the  simple 
truth  which  Christ  communicated  to  the  world  ? 

Lessing  has  admirably  succeeded  in  explaining 
what  can  be  required  of  us,  under  circumstances  as 
they  are,  or  may  be.  The  judge  advises  the  three 
brothers  that  each  should  firmly  believe  his  ring  to 
be  the  genuine  one.  This  is  the  touchstone  which 
ought  to  decide  the  worth  of  any  religion,  of  any 
creed,  of  any  individual  instance  of  religious  faith 
and  profession.  Every  one  ought  to  be  willing  to 
grant  that  all  the  religious  sects  differing  from  his 
own,  may  also  have  received  their  rings  from  their 
father  though  theirs  may  not  be  genuine.  He  ought 
to  acknowledge  that  God,  for  some  unknown  purpose, 
allows  different  sects  to  exist,  and  at  least  for  a  time, 
to  flourish,  though  there  may  be  many  errors  mixed 
with  the  simple,  essential  truths  which  we  can  find 
in  almost  every  religion.  Every  one,  however,  not- 
withstanding his  duty  of  tolerating  other  sects,  ought 
firmly  to  believe  that  his  own  faith  is  the  genuine 
ring.    This  is  essential.    He  ought  to  acknowledge 


26 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


that  there  are  things  which  he  must  believe  without 
fully  comprehending  them  ;  he  may  even  acknowledge 
that  for  aught  he  knows,  he  may  be  erroneous  in 
some  things  he  believes,  or  disbelieves ;  but  above 
all  he  ought  to  be  sure  that  he  fall  into  no  error, 
nor  disbelieve  any  truth,  voluntarily,  or  through  his 
own  perverseness.  Every  one  must  think,  investigate 
and  choose  according  to  the  light  that  is  given  to 
him. 

If  it  is  his  lot  to  be  born  in  a  country,  in  a  family, 
in  a  century,  (or  whatever  other  outward  agencies  we 
may  name.)  that  make  it  impossible  for  him  to  choose 
without  any  prejudice,  or  perhaps  to  choose  at  all, 
then  let  him  faithfully  and  sincerely  accept  the  faith 
that  is  offered  him  by  his  fellow-men  and  his  God. 
If  he  is  fortunate  enough  to  have  been  disenthralled 
from  outward  bondage,  let  him  compare  the  different 
sects  that  are  willing  to  receive  him  ;  let  him  decide 
whether  any  one  seems  to  him  really  to  embody  truth 
in  perfect  purity,  and  if  he  finds  such  a  one,  let  him 
join  that  brotherhood,  pledging  himself  to  it  with 
heart  and  hand. 

If  he  find  none  that  seems  to  be  free  from  error, 
then  let  him  decide  whether  love  to  God  and  love  to 
man  require  him,  for  the  sake  of  fulfilling  his  destiny 
on  earth  to  pledge  himself  to  any  sect.  If  so,  then 
let  him  adhere  to  that  one  which  he  finds  to  be  the 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  27 


most  free  from  error.  If  lie  is  not  prompted  to  do 
so,  then  let  him  decide  whether  God  has  called  him 
independently  to  preach  the  truth  as  he  sees  and 
views  it.  If  the  spirit  move  him  not,  then  let  him 
simply  and  quietly  walk  hefore  his  God  as  an  humhle 
and  trustful  child,  abstaining  from  evil  and  doing 
good  as  much  as  lies  within  him.  He  will  prove  that 
his  ring  is  genuine  ;  he  will  follow  the  judge's  advice, 
and  he  will  verify  the  judge's  prediction. 

This  is  the  whole  secret,  or  rather  the  open  secret 
about  the  worth  of  any  religion,  of  any  religious 
profession — sincerity  and  consistency,  that  is,  the 
fact  of  having  tried  to  find  out  one's  true  relation 
to  God,  and  the  fact  of  endeavoring  to  regulate  one's 
whole  life  in  accordance  with  this  relation,  or  rather 
as  its  natural  result  and  effluence.  Whatever  a  man, 
therefore,  may  profess,  his  ring  is  not  genuine,  if  he 
is  guilty  of  inconsistency  and  hypocrisy. 

If  I  had  written  the  foregoing  pages  ten  or  fifteen 
years  ago,  I  might  have  believed  that  I  had  now  said 
enough  about  this  story  of  Lessing,  and  that  it  would 
be  enough  for  me  to  try  living  in  accordance  with 
the  spirit  it  breathes,  and  to  wish  that  others  might 
do  the  same.  At  that  time  my  state  of  mind,  my 
experience  and  my  surroundings  were  such  as  to 
make  me  only  admire  the  beauty  and  truth  I  found 
in  this  story.    I  was  not  then  able  or  induced  to  take 


28 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


another  view  of  the  subject.  At  present,  however, 
I  feel  bound  to  state  in  what  respects  I  find  the  story 
deficient  and  where  I  think  we  ought  to  alter,  or  at 
least  to  complete  its  meaning  and  import. 

I  will  not  lay  great  stress  upon  the  circumstance 
that  there  is  no  foundation  for  saying  there  was  at 
first  only  one  genuine  ring  which  was  handed  down 
through  generations,  from  son  to  son.  Abstract 
truth  never  has  dwelt  upon  the  earth,  and  the  primi- 
tive generations  of  mankind  never  had  any  percep- 
tion of  religion  in  all  its  simplicity  and  purity. 
Still  we  may  be  easily  satisfied  with  the  way  in  which 
Lessing  states  the  subject.  His  supposition  cannot 
have  any  practical  result  and  effect  for  the  worse. 
On  the  contrary,  I  find  it  has  a  very  delightful  effect 
upon  the  mind,  since  it  serves  as  a  contrast  to  the 
present  transitory  and  ]  amen  table  state  of  confusion 
and  degradation,  and  incites  the  mind  to  long  for  a 
better  and  more  perfect  condition  of  mankind — no 
matter  whether  such  a  state  ever  has  existed  or  not 

More  important  is  the  view  we  must  take  in  devi- 
ation from  Lessing's  representation,  of  the  number 
and  the  names  of  the  sects  we  are  obliged  to  compare. 
In  this  country  and  at  the  present  time,  there  is  no 
practical  need  of  our  taking  the  Jewish  and  Moham- 
medan sects  into  consideration  ;  we  must  confine  our 
comparison  to  the  different  denominations  of  Christians. 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY. 


29 


In  Lessing's  time  and  in  the  country  that  Lore 
him,  there  would  have  been  hardly  any  inducement 
to  take  a  comprehensive  view  of  any  other  than  the 
Catholic,  Lutheran  and  Eeformed  churches.  With 
us,  however,  it  is  different.  The  sects  which  exist 
around  us,  which  lay  claim  to  our  attention  and 
invite  us  to  join  their  ranks,  are  far  more  than  three 
in  number,  and  this  circumstance  makes,  therefore, 
the  matter  more  complicate  and  the  decision  more 
difficult. 

The  principal  things  about  which  we  must  differ 
from  Lessing  are  the  decision  and  the  choice  which 
ought  to  be  the  result  of  our  knowledge  and  views 
concerning  the  different  sects.  When  Nathan  has 
finished  his  story,  he  says  to  Saladin,  "  If  you  feel 
within  you  that  you  are  this  wiser  man  who  was 
promised," — Saladin  interrupts  him,  saying,  "I  — 
dust  ?  I — nothing  ?  0  God ! — Nathan,  dear  Nathan ! 
Thy  judge's  thousands  of  thousand  years  are  not 
yet  past.  His  judgment's  seat  does  not  belong  to  me. 
Go  !    Go  !    But  be  my  friend  V9 

I  think  we  ought  not  to  agree  with  the  opinion 
which  this  passage  implies.  As  far  as  we,  individu- 
ally and  personally  are  concerned,  I  think,  we  ought 
to  say  that  the  judge's  seat  belongs  to  each  and  all 
of  us.  As  I  said  before,  if  Providence  has  enabled 
us  to  compare  the  different  sects,  it  is  not  only  our 


30 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


right,  but  also  our  duty  to  decide  whether  any  one 
of  them  is  an  unalloyed  embodiment  of  true  religion, 
or  to  find  out  Avhich  of  them  comes  nearest  to  our 
standard  of  purity  and  perfection.  And  at  the  pres- 
ent time  most  of  us,  at  least  in  this  country,  are 
enabled  and  induced  to  compare  the  different  sects, 
and  we  are  not  allowed  to  waive  the  question,  "  what 
denomination  we  consider  to  be  the  best." 

There  is  another  passage  in  Lessing's  work  which 
refers  to  the  same  subject.  Saladin  interrupts 
Nathan's  story  with  these  words  :  "  The  rings  ! — Do 
not  play  with  me  ! — I  should  think  that  the  religions 
I  named  to  thee,  might  be  distinguished.  Even  as 
to  dress  ;  as  to  drink  and  meat !"  Nathan  replies  ; 
"  Only  not  as  far  as  their  foundation  is  concerned. 
For  do  they  not  all  found  themselves  on  history, 
written,  or  delivered  by  tradition  ?  xVnd  history,  I 
suppose ,  has  to  be  accepted  only  on  trust  and  faith, 
is  it  not  so  ?  Well,  whose  trustworthiness  and  faith- 
fulness is  one  least  apt  to  doubt  ?  I  should  think 
that  of  one's  own  ?  That  of  tli  >se  from  whom  we 
descended — that  of  those  who  have  given  us  from 
our  childhood  proofs  of  their  love — who  never  have 
deceived  us,  except  where  it  was  more  salutary  for 
us  to  be  deceived  ?  How  can  I  less  trust  in  my  fore- 
fathers, than  you  in  yours  ?  Or  the  reverse.  Can 
I  expect  that  you  should  give  the  lie  to  your  ancestors 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  31 


for  the  sake  of  not  contradicting  mine?  Or  the 
reverse.  The  same  can  be  said  of  the  Christians. 
Is  it  not  so  ?"  Saladin  exclaims ;  "  By  the  living 
One  !    The  man  is  right.    I  must  be  silent V 

There  is  a  great  deal  of  beauty,  force  and  truth 
in  this  dialogue.  Still,  neither  the  views  it  expresses, 
nor  the  whole  work  of  which  it  is  a  part,  ought  to 
lead  us  into  the  belief  that  it  is  entirely  indifferent 
or  irrelevant  what  sect  we  belong  to.  We  know  that 
God  will  accept  every  one,  to  whatever  sect  he  may 
belong,  if  he  is  only  sincere  in  his  belief,  and  dili- 
gent in  making  his  life  the  sincere  expression  of  his 
faith.  But  we  ought  not  to  say  that  all  sects  are 
equal  as  to  the  probability  of  making  it  easy  for  us 
to  be  sincere  in  our  belief,  or  to  make  our  life  the 
true  and  real  effluence  of  our  faith. 

We  live  in  a  century  and  in  a  country  and  in  cir- 
cumstances that  cannot  fail  to  open  our  minds  more 
or  less  to  reflection,  and  we  cannot  abide  by  the 
traditions,  by  the  history  and  by  the  opinions  of  our 
fathers  and  grandfathers.  We  must  compare ;  we 
must  choose.  And  in  doing  so,  we  shall  find  a  vast 
difference  between  the  various  sects.  Some  will 
seem  to  us  repulsive,  because  our  minds  revolt 
against  subscribing  to  their  tenets,  or  because  their 
rites  and  outward  regulations  in  general  do  not 
awaken  any  sympathy  in  our  hearts.    Others  will 


32 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


have  a  contrary  effect,  and  if  we  deliberately  choose 
to  join  any  sect,  we  must  bestow  our  preference  where 
we  hope  entirely,  or  almost  entirely,  to  find  ourselves 
free  from  danger  of  subscribing  to  tenets  which 
seem  erroneous  or  doubtful  to  us  ;  where  we  are  sure 
that  the  forms  and  regulations  will  not  hinder  us  in 
leading  a  sincere  and  godly  life ;  where  on  the  con- 
trary, everything  will  tend  to  assisting,  inciting  and 
strengthening  us  in  our  endeavors  to  become  perfect 
as  our  Father  in  Heaven  is  perfect. 

I  know  that  Providence  does  not  grant  equal  pow- 
ers and  equal  opportunities  to  all  men  by  their  own 
observation,  investigation  and  experience  to  come  to 
a  comprehensive  view  and  decision  concerning  all  or 
even  most  of  the  many  sects  of  Christians.  Still,  as 
I  have  said  before,  at  the  present  time,  in  this  country 
most  persons  are  more  or  less  enabled,  obliged  and 
forced  to  decide  and  to  choose  for  themselves  on  some 
ground  or  other.  It  is  their  duty  to  use  those  means 
which  God  may  send  them,  by  which  he  induces  them 
to  think,  and  by  which  he  assists  them  in  choosing. 
Thus  I  consider  it  to  be  the  duty  of  every  one  who 
has  read  the  foregoing  pages,  carefully  to  examine 
the  following  narrative  of  my  experiences. 

Providence  has  guided  me  so  far  in  a  strange 
manner  through  a  checkered  life.  On  my  way 
through  the  past  years  I  have  had  many  occasions 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY. 


33 


and  inducements  to  compare  the  different  christian 
sects,  as  well  concerning  their  different  creeds,  as  con- 
cerning their  different  forms.  I  have  probably  had 
more  experience  of  this  kind  than  commonly  falls  to 
the  lot  of  man,  and  finally  the  conviction  slowly 
ripened  within  me,  that  I  should  not  have  lived  in 
vain,  if  I  had  communicated  to  my  fellow-men  my 
experiences  and  opinions  concerning  the  two  aspects 
of  religion  I  have  mentioned. 

If  humility  towards  our  Creator  allows  us  to  speak 
of  a  special  Providence,  I  might  say,  I  have  reason 
to  believe  that  my  fate,  my  whole  life  has  tended  to 
fit  me  for  the  task  I  have  undertaken  and  to  awaken 
in  me  the  sense  of  an  imperative  duty,  pointing  out 
to  me  this  task  as  the  only  way  in  which  I  could 
make  my  life  the  truthful  reflection  of  a  sincere  faith, 
of  a  faith  dearly  bought  through  long  years  of  doubt, 
darkness  and  severe  trials. 

Under  these  impressions  I  write ;  under  these 
impressions  I  trust  in  the  issue  of  my  undertaking. 
May  God  destine  it  to  assist  individuals  in  their 
search  after  holiness  and  truth  ;  or  may  it  pass  by 
silently,  unnoticed  and  as  to  the  world  at  large, 
ineffective — one  happy  result  it  will  produce — it  will 
ease  the  conscience  of  one  person  ; — finished  or  unfin- 
ished, it  will  prepare  one  person  to  die  with  the  con- 
viction of  having  tried  to  do  his  duty,  and  will 
3 


34 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


thus  enable  him  to  die  in  tranquillity  and  peace. 

I  wish,  therefore,  as  I  have  intimated,  to  relate 
the  incidents  of  my  past  life,  as  far  as  they  seem  to 
be  either  directly  or  indirectly  connected  with  the 
subject  of  religion  ;  as  far  as  they  in  themselves  are 
apt  to  show  which  religious  sect  seems  to  be  the  best 
adapted  to  promoting  through  its  tenets  and  its 
forms,  the  aims  of  religion  ;  or  at  least  as  far  as 
they  have  given  me  occasion  to  meditate  on  this 
subject.  Among  other  subjects  of  general  or  particu- 
lar interest  I  shall  mention  only  those  which  seemed 
to  have  some  influence  upon  the  development  of  my 
individual  religious  life  and  thus  indirectly  upon  my 
opinions  concerning  religion  in  general. 

I  will  not  raise  the  reader's  expectations  so  much 
as  to  cause  him  to  anticipate  a  narrative  full  of  start- 
ling facts  and  events  :  on  the  contrary,  many  things 
may  appear,  in  themselves,  insignificant ;  their  only 
claim  to  attention  will  be  that  they  afford  me  an 
occasion  for  making  reflections,  and  that  they  may 
induce  the  reader  to  look  back  upon  his  own  life,  to 
compare  his  own  experiences  and  opinions  with  mine, 
and  thus  to  come  to  a  conclusion  of  his  own.  What- 
ever this  conclusion  may  be,  God  will  bless  it  with 
happy  consequences,  if  it  is  only  formed  with  sincerity 
and  with  a  good  will  towards  God  and  humanity. 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY. 


35 


CHAPTEK  HI. 

REMINISCENCES  OF  CHILDHOOD. 

I  was  born  in  the  year  1821  in  Germany,  in  the 
Northern  part  of  the  Granddukedoni  of  Oldenburg. 

There  is  nothing  that  has  so  great  an  influence 
upon  a  person's  relations  throughout  his  life,  as  the 
circumstances  connected  with  the  beginning  of  his 
earthly  career.  In  what  age  or  century  a  person  is 
born ;  in  what  country  and  place  ;  who  are  his  parents 
and  what  their  constitution,  temperament,  character 
and  condition ;  whatever  other  agencies  act  upon  a 
person  about  the  time  of  his  birth — all  this  together 
has  such  an  influence  upon  his  bodily  and  mental 
constitution,  upon  his  development,  upon  his  feelings, 
thoughts,  character  and  fate  throughout  his  life,  that 
it  is  very  difficult  to  draw  a  line  between  the  two 
parts  of  his  actions  and  fate  which  depend,  or  do  not 
depend  upon  his  free  will. 

This  general  remark  is  applicable  to  a  good  many 
things  connected  with  religion  ;  particularly  have  the 
circumstances  connected  with  a  person's  birth,  a  great 
influence  as  to  the  religious  sect  to  which  he  after- 
wards may  belong.  This  is  more  noticeable  in  Europe 
than  in  this  country ;  in  fact,  in  any  other  country 


36 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


more  so  than  in  the  United  States.  There  are  mil- 
lions and  millions  of  people  on  earth  of  whom  it 
could  never  be  expected  that  they  should  have  the 
remotest  idea  of  belonging  to  any  other  sect  than 
to  that  of  their  parents.  And  even  if  every  indi- 
vidual's mind  were  so  far  developed  as  to  be  able  to 
comprehend  such  a  possibility,  still  there  would  be 
millions  of  people  left  who  would  not  be  at  liberty 
to  follow  their  own  choice.  This  shows  how  little 
difference  it  makes,  as  to  acceptableness  with  God,  to 
what  denomination  a  person  belongs  ;  that  is,  not  by 
choice,  but  in  fact. 

In  Germany,  the  inhabitants  of  the  same  region 
belong  almost  exclusively  to  the  same  denomination. 
The  South  is  Catholic;  the  North  Protestant.  In 
some  large  cities  one  may  find  considerable  congre- 
gations formed  by  people  who  do  not  belong  to  the 
prevailing  sect ;  but  in  smaller  towns  and  in  the 
country  there  are  usually  only  a  few  dissenting  indi- 
viduals ;  in  many  regions  there  is  not  one  such  person 
to  be  found.  In  the  Northern  part  of  my  native 
state,  the  inhabitants  belonged  to  the  Lutheran 
denomination.  Probably,  I  did  not  see  in  my  child- 
hood any  person  who  was  not  a  Lutheran,  except, 
perhaps,  a  few  Jews  who  lived  here  and  there  as 
pedlers  or  hucksters. 

Everything,  therefore,  which  had  a  religious  influ- 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY. 


37 


ence  upon  me,  or  which,  at  least,  was  intended  to 
have  such  an  influence,  came  to  me  through  the 
channel  of  the  Lutheran  creed  and  the  Lutheran 
rites.  There  and  at  that  time  every  child  was  bap- 
tized a  few  days,  or  a  few  weeks  after  its  "birth.  I 
suppose,  no  parent  would  have  heen  at  liberty  to 
deviate  from  this  rule.  At  least,  I  recollect  that 
once,  (even  more  than  twenty  years  later)  a  child 
was  taken  by  the  constable  and  carried  to  the  church 
to  be  baptized.  Its  parents  had  refused  to  have  the 
child  baptized  by  the  parish  minister,  since  they  had 
been  converted  to  a  sect  which  just  then  began  to 
make  proselytes  in  Germany  without  being  tolerated 
and  without  being  allowed  to  withdraw  from  the 
existing  church  and  ritual. 

During  my  childhood,  however,  there  was  no  agi- 
tation of  any  kind  concerning  religion.  Most  parents 
had  their  children  baptized,  not  exactly  because  the 
government  commanded  it,  nor  because  they  them- 
selves had  investigated  the  doctrine  of  baptism  and 
had  come  to  the  conviction  of  its  necessity.  I  sup- 
pose, they  were  only  prompted  by  a  superstitious,  or 
at  least  a  vague  belief  in  the  purifying  power  of 
baptism,  and  by  the  desire  of  giving  the  child  a 
name.  Perhaps  they  ventured  upon  choosing  a 
name  sometime  before  baptism,  and,  though  rarely, 
upon  using  this  name  ;  but  nobody  believed  that  the 


38 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


latter  could  be  lawfully  given  except  by  the  minister 
while  baptizing.  I  know  of  one  instance  where 
the  minister  forgot  to  pronounce  the  name  intended 
to  be  given.  The  child's  parents  had  no  peace  of 
mind  until  the  minister  had  come  once  more,  had 
baptized  the  child  again  and  given  it  a  name. 

According  to  the  rule  I  have  spoken  of,  I  was 
baptized  when  about  a  fortnight  old.  Whether  I 
have  reason  to  rejoice  in  this  circumstance,  I  am 
hardly  able  to  decide.  I  know  it  has  done  me  no 
harm,  and  on  the  whole,  I  know  only  of  two  things 
which  might  be  said  in  opposition  to  such  a  rite. 
The  one  which  is  merely  local  and  outward,  is  this : 
The  life,  or  at  least  the  health  of  children  is  often  ex-' 
posed  to  danger,  if  the  baptism  is  performed  in  the 
church,  and  if  the  children  are  carried  there  during 
the  winter,  as  it  is  done  in  Germany  where  the 
churches  are  not  warmed.  And  the  immersion  of 
adults  cannot  fail  to  bo  injurious  under  such  circum- 
stances as  we  sometimes  hear  of.  It  is  true  that 
during  an  intense  excitement  a  person  can  endure  a 
great  deal ;  still,  such  a  power  of  endurance  ought 
not  to  be  put  to  so  severe  a  test. 

The  other  objection  is  of  a  graver  nature.  People 
are  apt  to  have  too  high  an  opinion  of  the  influence 
of  baptism,  an  opinion  degenerating  into  superstitious 
awe  and  hope.    There  are  whole  sects  whose  creed 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  39 


enjoins  the  belief  in  the  purifying  effect  of  baptism. 
We  ought  not  to  find  fault  with  Luther  for  standing 
still  and  halting  half  way ;  for  saying  in  his  some- 
what mystical  explanation  of  the  sacraments  :  "  the 
water  does  not  do  it,  but  the  word  of  God  which 
cometh  with  and  by  the  water."  Luther  was  a  great 
man,  a  giant  who  dared  to  storm  the  fortress  of  the 
Catholic  hierarchy,  formalism  and  superstition ;  but 
should  we  wonder,  if  he  could  not  rid  himself  from 
some  preconceived  notions?  Truly,  if  Luther  had 
lived  in  the  present  day,  he  would  have  been  a 
reformer  of  a  different  stamp. 

At  the  present  time  it  seems  to  me  infinitely  more 
easy  to  free  one's  self  from  the  dominion  of  precon- 
ceived notions.  A  clearer  view  ought  now  to  be 
expected  even  from  thousands  of  men  who  are  far 
inferior  to  Luther  in  mental  power  and  in  genuine, 
rational  piety.  Nothing  but  want  of  independent 
thought  can  be  the  reason  why  millions  of  Christians 
at  present  ascribe  to  baptism  more  than  a  symbolical 
significance. 

If  I  examine  myself,  with  the  best  intention,  I 
cannot  really  ascribe  to  being  baptized  anything  good 
that  I  might  find  within  me.  The  minister  who 
baptized  me,  was  a  very  good  man,  but  he  could  not 
influence  me  at  the  time,  neither  personally,  nor  as 
God's  medium  or  mediator.    I  met  him  again  when 


40 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


I  was  a  youth,  and  I  honored  him  as  a  good  man, 
but  not  because  he  had  baptized  me.  What  virtue 
or  power  was  there  in  the  act  of  sprinkling  my  head 
with  a  few  drops  of  water?  I  was  certainly  after  it 
identically  the  same  being  in  body  and  soul,  as  the 
moment  before.  The  sacred  words  the  minister  pro- 
nounced, could  not  change  me,  and  transform  me  in 
that  moment  from  a  Heathen  into  a  Christian.  They 
could  not  drive  out  the  inherited  sin,  if  there  was 
any  in  me.  They  could  not  protect  me  against  the 
influence  of  the  devil,  if  I  was  exposed  to  the  malice 
of  such  a  being.  They  could  not  change  the  aim 
for  which  a  kind  Deity  had  created  me,  for  God  is 
good  and  wise,  and  does  not  need  the  rite  of  baptism 
to  connect  himself  kindly  and  closely  with  the  crea- 
tures of  his  hand. 

The  only  influence  my  baptism  could  have,  was 
that  exerted  on  the  grown  persons  concerned  in  it, 
and  I  hardly  venture  to  say  that  it  had  any  decided 
influence  upon  them.  I  suppose,  my  parents'  con- 
science was  eased  by  having  me  baptized,  but  I  do 
not  believe  that  their  conduct  towards  me,  their  care 
for  me  and  their  influence  upon  me  were  much  affected 
by  that  act,  or  by  the  recollection  of  it.  The  min- 
ister who  was  afterward  promoted  to  a  higher  dignity, 
and  in  whose  diocese  I  was  teacher  for  some  time, 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY. 


41 


treated  me  very  kindly ;  still,  I  am  sure  he  would 
have  done  so,  if  he  had  not  "baptized  me. 

I  do  not  think  that  my  sponsors  were  much  influ- 
enced by  that  religious  act ;  at  least,  I  do  not  remem- 
ber that  they  ever  tried,  as  such,  to  promote  my 
bodily  or  mental  welfare.  In  fact,  I  am  not  sure 
that  I  ever  have  known  who  they  were.  When  I 
commenced  this  part  of  my  narrative,  I  did  not  know 
their  names,  and  wishing  to  know  of  my  relation  to 
them,  I  was  obliged,  first  to  examine  the  certificate 
of  baptism  in  my  possession.  I  find  there  one  per- 
son mentioned,  whom,  I  think,  I  have  never  known, 
and  the  other  two  were  not  at  all  remembered  by  me 
as  my  sponsors. 

My  experience  on  this  subject  is  no  exception. 
Persons  in  the  most  widely  differing  situations  must 
acknowledge  to  have  had  the  same  experience.  The 
poorer  classes  of  my  countrymen  chose  sponsors 
principally  with  the  expectation  of  most  welcome 
baptismal  presents,  and  when  the  sponsors  had  given 
these,  they  had  done  all  that  was  expected  from  them. 
In  other  cases,  the  sponsors  were  chosen  on  the 
ground  of  consanguinity,  or  of  other  claims  to  re- 
spect and  attention. 

I  do  not  recollect  often  to  have  met  with  instances 
where  sponsors  were  chosen,  or  were  acting  in  accord- 


42 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


ance  with  the  principle  of  responsibility  and  guar- 
dianship involved  in  this  relation. 

Still,  after  all,  I  would  not  very  decidedly  militate 
against  the  continuance  of  the  rite  of  baptism.  I 
know  the  Quakers  have  good  reasons  for  maintaining 
that  baptism  with  water  is  no  sacrament.  John  the 
Baptist  says  that  he  himself  baptizes  with  water, 
but  Christ  will  baptize  with  the  Hohy  Ghost  and  with 
fire.    (Matt,  iii :  11.    Lukeiii:  16.) 

The  Quakers  are  right  when  they  say,  there  is  no 
proof  that  Christ's  injunctions  of  baptizing  and  of 
being  baptized,  include  the  necessity  of  baptizing 
with  water.  They  are  right  in  saying  there  is  no 
record  of  Christ's  having  baptized  anybody.  They 
have,  therefore,  some  reason  for  explaining  baptism 
as  a  spiritual  regeneration  and  for  discontinuing  the 
rite  of  baptism  as  a  mere  form. 

I  agree  so  far  with  them,  that  I  personally  do  not 
attach  any  importance  to  having  been  baptized,  and 
that  I  think  the  most  perfect  state  of  the  human 
mind  is  the  one  in  which  an  individual  proves  to  be 
religious  independently  of  all  outward  forms.  I  can- 
not help  wishing,  therefore,  that  all  Christians  might 
adopt  the  view  of  the  Quakers,  and  that  everybody 
might  be  baptized  with  the  Holy  Ghost  and  with  fire, 
and  not  with  water.  Still,  I  believe,  that  at  present 
the  world  at  large  is  not  prepared  for  leading  a  reli- 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY. 


43 


gious  life  entirely  independent  of  forms  and  rites, 
and,  therefore,  I  think  we  ought  to  be  tolerant  enough 
to  look  without  great  disappointment  upon  the  con- 
tinuance of  baptism  among  some  sects,  for  an  indefi- 
nite space  of  time. 

However,  if  I  should  express  my  opinion  fully,  I 
ought  to  add  that  I  should  have  much  more  sympathy, 
in  this  respect,  with  the  Baptists,  than  with  the  other 
denominations  who  consider  the  baptism  of  infants 
necessary.  As  I  have  stated  above,  the  influence  of 
the  latter  upon  the  assisting  grown  persons  is  very 
slight,  very  rare  and  very  passing.  The  influence 
upon  the  child  I  consider  to  be  null  at  the  time,  and 
problematic  as  to  the  future.  In  this  country,  I  sup- 
pose I  have  seen  grown  persons,  at  least,  I  know  I 
have  seen  children  and  youths,  who  never  had  been 
baptized,  and  certainly  there  was  nothing  about  them 
by  which  to  distinguish  them  from  those  that  had 
been  baptized. 

The  Baptists  have,  at  least,  this  in  their  favor, 
that  they  can  say,  the  baptism  of  adults  is  calculated 
to  have  some  good  influence  upon  the  baptized  indi- 
viduals. If  it  is  not  the  fruit  of  superstition  or  of 
hypocrisy,  it  is  the  result  and  evidence  of  a  right 
state  of  mind  and  probably  a  means  of  strengthening 
and  inciting  a  person  to  strive  for  a  pure  religious 
faith  and  a  pure  religious  life. 


44  THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 

Having  thus  expressed  my  opinion  upon  the  most 
important  religious  subject  connected  with  my  child- 
hood, I  have  hut  little  more  to  add.  My  parents 
were  both  quite  as  religious  as  anybody  around  them. 
My  father  was  a  just,  upright  and  active  man.  He 
was  organist  in  the  church  of  a  small  village  and 
teacher  in  the  parish  school,  and  as  such  he  had  offi- 
cially to  take  a  part  in  all  the  customary  religious 
acts  and  performances.  He  did  this  without  any 
great  amount  of  outward  signs  of  devotion,  but  also 
without  any  carelessness  or  levity.  My  mother  went 
only  once  or  twice  a  month  to  church,  but  her  life 
was  an  uninterrupted  exemplification  of  the  true 
character  of  a  good  wife,  mother,  mistress  and 
neighbor. 

I  can  hardly  remember  any  instance  of  having 
been  obliged  or  induced  during  my  childhood,  to  join 
in  any  religious  exercises,  or  even  to  witness  them. 
I  have  a  faint  recollection  of  having  been  at  church 
and  of  listening  to  the  organ,  but  I  have  not  the 
slightest  recollection  of  having  heard  any  sermon. 
At  home  we  had  no  morning  or  evening  devotions. 
As  I  intimated  above,  this  does  not  prove  that  my 
parents  were  not  religious,  or  did  not  try  to  educate 
their  children  well.  They  were  what  their  time  and 
their  country  made  them.  I  think  there  was  not 
in  the  whole  neighborhood  a  family,  where  the  mem- 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY. 


45 


bers  were  wont  to  meet  for  any  such  religious  exercises. 
Thus  it  could  not  be  expected  of  my  parents,  that 
they  should  do  so. 

What  in  this  country  is  left  to  parents  and  to 
Sabbath- School  Teachers,  was  in  my  native  country 
expected  and  required  from  the  common  schools. 
There,  the  children  are  instructed  in  religion  as  soon 
as  they  enter,  which  is  at  the  age  of  six  years,  and 
there  I  suppose  I  received  my  first  definite  impressions 
concerning  religion.  Still  I  am  unable  to  trace  them. 
Since  my  father  allowed  me  to  enter  the  school  when 
I  was  four  years  old,  I  learned  all  the  first  elements 
of  knowledge,  (writing,  reading,  &c.,)  without  now 
being  able  to  recall  that,  when  and  how  I  learned 
them. 

Whatever  course  my  parents  pursued  in  my  mental 
and  spiritual  education,  whether  they  could  have 
done  more,  or  not,  for  the  sake  of  making  me  a  good 
and  pious  man,  so  much  is  certain,  that  they  did  not 
kill  the  spirit  by  formalism  ;  they  did  nothing  to  make 
me  hate  outward  religion  ;  they  did  not  embitter  my 
early  years- by  useless  and  irksome  attempts  to  foster 
a  precocious  religious  spirit.  I  have  no  recollection 
of  early  griefs  and  sorrows,  and  believe,  therefore, 
to  have  spent  a  very  happy  childhood,  a  childhood 
which  made  it  less  difficult  for  me,  afterwards  to 
aspire  to  purity  and  simplicity  in  religious  faith. 


46 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


I  ought,  however,  on  this  occasion  to  notice  one 
more  thing  which  is  of  the  greatest  importance  as  to 
the  religious  views  which  a  child  may  imbibe,  and 
which  may  perhaps  be  fixed  in  his  mind  forever ;  I 
mean  superstition.  A  child  can  be  made  to  believe 
anything,  and  what  it  does  believe  at  the  time — this 
is  entirely  the  work  of  outward  influences.  And 
what  the  grown  person  believes,  or  disbelieves,  may 
be  different  from  the  belief  of  his  childhood  ;  still, 
the  latter  cannot  be  considered  as  entirely  irrelevant. 
Happy  are  those  who  in  their  childhood  are  neither 
made  to  believe  too  little,  nor  too  much ;  for  any  one 
is  apt  on  coming  to  years  of  discretion  to  be  driven 
into  an  extreme  either  on  the  same  side  where  he 
erred  in  his  childhood,  or  on  the  opposite. 

My  parents,  as  far  as  I  recollect,  did  nothing  to 
make  me  superstitious  in  religious  matters.  I  only 
remember  that  my  mother  used  to  relate  incidents 
like  the  following. 

One  evening  during  her  childhood,  a  gentleman 
and  his  wife  who  had  paid  a  visit  at  her  father's 
house,  were  accompanied  home  by  a  servant  with  a 
lantern.  On  the  way  they  were  overtaken  by  a 
thunderstorm,  and  the  servant,  in  spite  of  all  admoni- 
tion, spoke  about  it  in  a  very  irreligious  way,  saying, 
"  light  up,  devil,  &c."  Because  the  weather  was  so 
bad,  he  was  persuaded  to  stay  over  night  at  the 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  47 


neighbor's  house.  There,  he  lay  down  to  sleep  on  a 
bench  in  a  front  room.  The  lightning  struck  the 
house,  entered  at  the  gable  end,  went  down  into  that 
room,  killed  that  servant,  and  went  out  again  without 
injuring  any  one  else,  or  setting  the  house  on  fire. 

I  know  we  ought  not  to  judge  others,  and  ought 
not  to  call  anybody's  misfortunes,  except  our  own, 
punishments,  judgments,  admonitions  of  the  Deity. 
Still,  I  would  rather  have  been  taught  by  my  mother 
that  God  punishes  the  wicked  directly  on  this  earth 
than  to  be  told  that  money  paid  for  a  mass,  will  help 
a  soul  sooner  to  get  out  of  purgatory,  &c. 

From  other  children  and  from  grown  people  of  a 
limited  education  I  heard  occasionally  some  things 
which  were  superstitious  and  absurd  enough.  There 
was  more  superstition  among  the  people  at  large  than 
one  would  expect  to  find  in  the  19th  century,  in  a 
protestant  community.  Many  there  were  who  firmly 
believed  in  ghosts,  in  forebodings,  in  places  being 
haunted  &c.    I  will  only  give  one  specimen. 

In  our  neighborhood  there  was  an  estate  which  in 
feudal  times  had  been  owned  by  a  noble  family. 
Several  centuries  ago  there  lived  on  this  estate  a  man 
who  was  a  tyrant  over  his  subjects.  He  built  a 
church,  and  when  it  was  finished,  and  the  preacher 
was  to  preach  in  it  for  the  first  time,  he  told  the 
latter  not  to  begin  his  sermon  before  he  should  arrive. 


48 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


The  preacher  waited  a  long  time,  but  at  last,  when 
he  gave  up  all  hope  of  seeing  the  nobleman,  he  began 
his  sermon.  Very  soon,  however,  his  patron  entered 
the  church,  and  finding  that  he  had  been  disobeyed, 
he  killed  the  minister  instantly  in  the  pulpit. 

This,  and  other  such  evil  deeds  showed  his  estrange- 
ment from  God ;  he  went  on  from  one  crime  to 
another,  and  at  last,  for  some  purpose  or  other,  he 
forfeited  himself  to  the  devil.  However,  when  he 
lay  on  his  death-bed,  he  determined  upon  cheating 
the  devil  out  of  his  reward,  and  gave  his  directions 
accordingly. 

His  servants,  therefore,  when  their  master  had 
died,  placed  him  in  a  coffin  upon  the  threshing  floor. 
Around  it  they  drew  a  magic  circle,  and  inside  of 
the  circle  they  seated  themselves  to  watch  and  to 
pray  over  the  corpse,  and  thus  to  keep  off  the  devil. 
At  midnight,  the  lord  of  the  infernal  regions  made 
his  appearance  and  demanded  his  own.  However, 
he  could  not  break  the  spell  and  could  not  pass  into 
the  circle.    Enraged  he  disappeared. 

The  second  night  he  was  not  much  more  successful. 
Misfortune  only  befell  a  chanticleer,  whom  the  ser- 
vants had  kept  within  the  circle  to  tell  by  his  song 
the  hour  of  the  night ;  he  ventured  across  the  line, 
and  the  devil  in  his  rage  tore  him  into  pieces.  Dur- 
ing the  third  night,  by  some  unaccountable  mistake, 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  49 

the  coffin  had  been  placed  too  near  the  circumference. 
The  devil  found  it  possible  to  lay  hold  of  the  corpse. 
The  servants,  when  they  saw  this,  tried  by  fervent 
and  loud  prayers  to  avert  the  impending  evil.  The 
devil  became  so  enraged  at  this  that  he  knew  no 
bounds  to  his  wrath  ;  he  fleeced  the  dead  body  in 
an  instant,  and  threw  the  skin  at  the  servants'  heads. 
The  men  stooped,  and  the  skin  hit  the  opposite  wall. 
It  made  a  reddish  spot  there,  and  this  spot  can  be 
seen  "  up  to  the  present  day no  whitewashing  can 
blot  out  the  stain. 

I  will  not  say  that  I  ever  believed  this  and  other 
stories  of  the  same  stamp,  but  I  know  I  listened  to 
them  with  infinite  delight  and  "  pleasant  horror," 
and  I  am  sure  there  were  many  old  people  and  chil- 
dren who  firmly  believed  them. 


4 


50 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


CHAPTER  IV. 

BOYHOOD. 

For  several  reasons  early  childhood  is  usually  con- 
sidered as  terminating  with  the  eighth  year.  For  a 
special  reason  I  must  consider  this  age  still  more 
decidedly  as  the  end  of  my  childhood.  At  that  time, 
my  father  was  promoted  to  a  better  situation  in  a 
village  about  nine  miles  distant  from  my  birthplace, 
and  this  change  of  residence  had  a  great  influence 
on  me.  At  least  it  seems  to  me,  as  if  it  all  at  once 
developed  my  mental  faculties  to  a  considerable 
degree. 

That  event  itself  left  a  very  lively  impression  on 
my  mind,  and  from  that  time  on,  I  can  not  only 
remember  many  single  facts  and  occurrences,  but  can 
also  trace  the  effects  these  events  had  on  me.  On 
the  other  hand,  the  years  just  preceding  that  change 
are  almost  a  blank  in  my  memory.  This  leads  me 
to  believe  that  it  does  not  injure  children  to  leave 
their  birthplace  when  young.  It  is  true,  they  ought 
not  to  travel  much,  nor  ought  they  to  be  transplanted, 
single  and  alone  ;  but  their  home  need  not  always 
be  in  the  same  place.  If  the  family  ties  remain 
unbroken,  a  change  of  residence  is  more  influential 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  51 


and  desirable  than  the  forming  of  local  attachments 
by  remaining  in  one  place. 

Kelio-ious  exercises  did  not  enter  into  our  domestic 
life  as  a  regular  thing,  any  more  than  in  our  former 
residence.  For  some  reason  or  other,  however,  my 
father  attempted  once,  or  twice  to  introduce  prayers 
before  dinner.  One,  or  two  of  us  children  had  to 
recite  a  short  prayer  which  we  had  learned  by  heart. 
This  rule,  however,  was  kept  up  only  a  few  weeks  or 
months,  and  I  recollect  very  well  how  delighted  we 
children  were  at  being  freed  from  such  a  duty.  I 
am  not  aware  that  any  religious  thought  or  feeling 
ever  was  awakened  in  me,  by  and  during  those 
prayers  ;  but  I  have  not  forgotten  what  an  irksome 
thing  they  seemed  to  be. 

I  do  not  know  what  induced  my  father  to  discon- 
tinue this  practice,  but  I  should  praise  him  and  con- 
sider him  very  judicious,  if  he  gave  it  up,  because  he 
found  it  a  disagreeable  task  for  us.  I  will  not  say 
that  parents  ought  to  do  nothing  that  displeases 
their  children,  but  I  think  children  who  are  indiffer- 
ent, or  averse  to  frequent  and  regular  praying,  show 
more  good  judgment  and  common  sense  than  their 
parents  who  insist  upon  forcing  it  upon  their  children 
against  their  wishes. 

At  school,  religion  formed  the  principal  part  of 
our  exercises  and  instruction.    Every  morning  and 


52 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


afternoon,  the  whole  class  sang  at  the  "beginning, 
three  or  four  stanzas  of  a  hymn ;  thereupon  one 
scholar  read  a  long  prayer ;  then  the  next  recited 
the  Lord's  prayer,  and  two  or  three  others  followed 
reciting  short  prayers  from  a  collection  which  each 
of  us  possessed.  At  noon  and  in  the  evening  the 
school  was  closed  by  a  short  prayer,  or  by  singing 
one  stanza  of  a  hymn.  My  recollection  of  these 
exercises  is  not  a  very  pleasant  one.  I  cannot  trace 
any  good  impression  they  made  on  me ;  on  the  con- 
trary, I  know  how  anxious  I  often  was  to  get  through. 
And  I  am  sure  I  was  no  more  irreligious  or  wicked 
than  the  other  scholars  ;  they  all  felt  and  spoke 
about  the  subject  as  I  did. 

More  favorable  and  cheerful  are  my  impressions 
of  the  religious  instruction  imparted  at  school.  My 
father  had  commenced  teaching  before  the  year  1810, 
when  the  methods  of  instruction  had  not  yet  been  so 
much  developed  and  perfectioned  as  they  were  when 
I  began  teaching ;  moreover,  at  that  time,  there  ex- 
isted no  special  institutions  like  the  teacher's  semi- 
naries of  a  later  date  in  which  we  younger  teachers 
were  directly  prepared  for  our  business.  Thus  it 
could  not  be  expected  from  my  father  that  he  should 
make  his  religious  instruction  as  interesting  and 
useful,  as  I  know  from  my  own  experience  they  can 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  53 


be  made.  Still,  even  his  labors,  I  think,  were  not 
in  vain. 

The  first  school  hour  of  two  mornings  in  the  week, 
was  dedicated  to  the  catechism  ;  of  two  others,  to 
Bible  history,  and  of  the  remaining  two,  to  the  Epis- 
tles and  to  Hymns.    The  first  branch  of  these  in- 
structions did  not  consist  in  the  teacher's  asking 
questions  from  the  book  and  the  scholars'  reciting 
answers  that  were  learned  by  rote.    The  teacher  had 
prepared  a  dialogue  upon  a  definite  plan.    For  exam, 
pie,  if  he  was  to  teach  about  Omnipotence,  he  first 
tried  to  elicit  from  the  scholars,  or  to  develop  in  their 
minds  the  idea  of  power  and  of  omnipotence.  Then 
he  made  them  find  in  the  Universe  around  them  and 
in  their  own  being,  the  proofs  of  God's  Omnipotence. 
Then  he  explained  the  verses  in  the  Bible  which 
speak  of  God  as  the  Almighty.    Lastly,  he  tried  to 
bring  this  knowledge  home  to  the  scholars  by  helping 
them  to  find  out  what  influence  this  truth  had,  or 
must  have  on  every  human  mind.    He  exemplified 
this  by  adducing  or  relating  instances  of  historical 
persons  whose  lives  showed  the  impress  of  this  truth, 
and  he  finished  by  a  short  epilogue  calculated  to 
awaken  in  the  scholars  a  desire  to  let  their  lives  be 
influenced  by  the  religious  truth  they  had  contem- 
plated.   If  a  teacher  did  not  always  succeed  in  warm- 
ing the  hearts  of  his  scholars,  at  least  he  was  apt  to 


54 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


enlighten  their  minds,  since  he  always  instructed  by 
means  of  free  and  unembarrassed  dialogues ;  and 
this  seems  to  me  to  be  doing  a  great  deal. 

The  second  branch  oi  religious  instruction  consisted 
in  reading,  reciting,  explaining  and  applying  those 
parts  of  the  old  and  new  Testament,  which,  connected 
wi  th  occasional  supplementary  information,  gave  a 
knowledge  of  the  ante-Mosaic  history,  of  the  origin, 
continuance  and  downfall  of  the  Mosaic  religion,  and 
of  the  origin  of  Christianity.  To  this  was  often 
added  an  outline  of  ecclesiastical  history  up  to  the 
present  time. 

The  third  branch  consisted  partly  in  reading,  analyz- 
ing, explaining  and  reciting  hymns,  but  principally 
in  reading  and  explaining  the  Epistles  of  the  Apostles, 
impressing  as  much  as  possible  upon  the  minds  and 
hearts  of  the  scholars  the  importance  and  necessity 
of  regulating  one's  life  in  accordance  with  the  precepts 
given  in  the  text. 

Besides  this  instruction,  complete  in  itself,  we  also 
received  instruction  from  the  minister,  and  I  recollect 
distinctly  what  a  useless  and  disagreeable  addition 
this  seemed  to  us.  On  Sundays,  the  scholars  of  the 
first  class  were  obliged  to  go  to  church,  and  when  the 
sei  vices  were  over,  we  had  to  place  ourselves  in  the 
aisle,  the  boys  in  a  file  on  one  side,  and  the  girls  on 
the  other.    As  I  was  at  the  head  of  the  class,  I  had 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY. 


55 


first  to  say  along  prayer  which.  I  had  learned  by  heart. 
Then  the  minister  tried  to  give  us  religious  instruction, 
but  he  never  made  it  interesting,  or  useful.  On  the 
whole,  never  afterwards  did  I  hear  a  minister  instruct 
the  children  so  well  in  religion,  as  the  primary  teach- 
ers. The  former  were  not,  like  the  latter,  directly 
prepared  and  trained  for  teaching  children,  through 
the  medium  of  dialogues,  and  failed,  therefore,  in 
forming  the  right  plan,  in  putting  the  right  questions* 
in  making  the  right  use  of  answers  they  received.  On 
the  whole,  they  were  deficient  in  tact,  and  the  latter 
makes  the  good  teacher,  much  more  than  any  amount 
of  erudition. 

On  Wednesdays  and  Saturdays  the  minister  came 
to  the  school.  On  the  latter  day,  he  explained  to  us 
Luther's  small  catechism.  On  the  former,  he  ques- 
tioned us  about  the  sermon  of  the  preceding  Sunday, 
of  which  he  expected  us  to  have  written,  at  least,  the 
text,  the  subject  and  the  principal  heads  or  subdivisions 
"We  did  not  like  this  much  ;  still  if  it  did  not  make  us 
better,  it  obliged  us,  at  least,  to  be  partially  attentive, 
and  it  proved  thus  to  be  a  good  mental  exercise.  I 
learned  to  give  quite  an  extensive  sketch  of  a  sermon, 
but  the  minister  once  made  a  great  mistake,  and  spoiled 
the  pleasure  I  might  have  derived  from  it.  Once, 
when  I  showed  him  such  a  sketch,  he  said,  he  supposed 
that  "  I  had  ploughed  with  another  person's  oxen," 


56 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


moaning  that  I  had  copied  from  the  notes  which  he 
knew  my  father's  assistaut  was  wont  to  make.  I  do 
not  think  I  wrote  again  an  extensive  sketch  of  a  ser- 
mon, until  I  went  to  another  school  and  heard  other 
ministers. 

Truly,  suspicion,  or  any  kind  of  injustice,  cuts  sha/p- 
ly  into  the  heart  of  a  child,  and  grown  persons  ought 
to  beware  of  hurting  a  child's  feelings.  I  remember, 
for  instance,  that  some  years  later,  one  of  my  teachers, 
in  a  fit  of  passion,  threw  a  book  at  the  head  of  a 
scholar.  The  latter  dodged,  and  the  book  hit  me  who 
was  sitting  on  the  bench  behind  him.  The  teacher 
did  not  say  a  word  of  excuse  to  me,  and  I  remember 
it  took  me  a  long  time  to  forgive  him  this  want  of 
justice  and 'of  kindness.  Surely,  the  best  way  of 
teaching  children  religion,  is  to  be  religious  one's  self, 
and  especially  scrupulously  religious  in  one's  treatment 
of  children.  And  by  "  religious  "  I  mean  "  wise,  just 
and  kind,"  towards  them,  as  God  is  towards  us. 

If  I  have  confessed  in  the  foregoing  lines,  that  I 
was  not  interested  in  most  of  the  religious  performan- 
ces I  participated  in  or  witnessed,  I  think  I  do  not 
expose  myself  to  the  blame  of  having  been  more 
irreligious  than  other  children.  I  have  noticed  the 
same  spirit  in  most  children  wherever  I  have  been. 
Even  in  this  country,  in  a  family  where  the  mother 
was  truly  a  pious  woman,  and  the  children  were  as  good 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  57 


and  as  well  educated  as  in  any  other  family,  I  noticed 
that  the  children  were  not  always  interested  in  our 
family  devotions,  (at  least,  not  in  tke  long  ones  on 
Sundays,)  and  that  they  really  disliked  heing  taught 
their  catechism. 

Instead  of  believing,  as  their  mother  did,  that  this 
was  owing  to  inherent  sin,  I  thought  they  followed 
their  uncorrupted  instinct  and  best  guide. 

As  to  public  worship,  I  think  the  Quakers  are,  by 
far,  the  most  judicious.  If  I  am  rightly  informed 
they  do  not  oblige  their  children  to  be  present  at  the 
Sunday  meetings,  but  hold  a  meeting  in  the  middle 
of  the  week,  which  is  appointed  principally  to  meet 
the  wants  of  children. 

I  must  notice  one  instance  from  my  boyhood  which 
shows,  in  opposition  to  other  things  mentioned,  that 
I  was  neither  thoughtless,  nor  inaccessible  to  religious 
impressions.  For  several  years,  my  father  let  me  go 
a  part  of  the  week,  to  a  neighboring  village  for  the 
sake  of  taking  Latin  lessons  from  a  candidate  of 
Divinity.  I  remember  that  every  morning  just  after 
having  started,  I  recommended  myself  to  God's  pro- 
tection, by  repeating  Christ's  words  :  "  Father,  into 
thy  hands  I  commend  my  spirit."  I  suppose,  I  was 
principally  influenced  by  fear,  to  do  so,  for  my  path  led 
me  through  many  meadows  where  there  were  herds  of 
cattle.    Occasionally  some  of  them  became  furious, 


58 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


and  we  heard  now  and  then  of  instances  where  a  person 
had  heen  attacked  by  them.  But  even  if  it  was  fear, 
and  not  the  higher  motive  of  disinterested  love  that 
first  led  me  thus  to  pray  of  my  own  accord,  I  look 
hack  upon  that  circumstance  with  great  delight.  It 
showed  that  I  spontaneously  acknowledged  God  to  he 
my  father  and  protector.  And  certainly  my  childish 
religion  was  as  good  as  that  of  most  grown  persons ; 
for  how  many  are  there,  who  can  say,  "  I  am  entirely 
free  from  fear  and  from  self-interest,  and  I  pray  to 
God  with  disinterestedness  and  pure  love ;  my  prayers 
are  not  the  result  of  mere  hahit,  nor  prompted  hy  the 
dread  of  impending  evil,  or  by  the  hopes  of  future 
gifts  and  rewards  ?  " 

When  I  was  about  12  years  of  age,  my  father  sent 
me  to  the  gymnasium  or  college,  in  a  neighboring 
town.  This  change  could  not  fail  again  to  have  a  de- 
cided influence  on  me  ;  it  changed  my  whole  course  of 
studies  ;  it  forced  me  into  entirely  different  associations  ; 
it  taught  me  somewhat  early  to  depend  upon  myself, 
since  my  father  hired  a  room  for  me  in  a  private  house 
where  the  people  had  and  exercised  no  control  over 
me.  Still  I  was  not  entirely  removed  out  of  my  fami- 
ly's circle.  I  was  only  five  miles  from  home  and  spent, 
therefore,  many  a  Satarday  and  Sunday  with  my 
parents,  besides  all  my  vacations  which  came  five  times 
a  year,  and  lasted  from  one  to  three  weeks  each. 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  59 


For  some  time  there  occurred  hardly  anything  of 
which  I  could  say  that  it  had  a  decidedly  new  religious 
influence  upon  me.  At  college  we  were  instructed  in 
religion  in  a  manner  which  has  left  no  deep  traces  in 
my  mind,  no  more  than^  the  Sunday  catechizations 
which  all  the  students  under  14  years  of  age  were 
ohliged  to  attend.  When  I  was  at  home,  I  often  went 
with  my  father  to  church/principally,  I  suppose,  "because 
I  liked  to  hear  the  organ  and  occasionally  to  play  it 
myself. 

When  I  was  about  14  years  of  age,  I  applied,  in 
conformity  with  the  laws  of  the  state,  for  being  con- 
firmed. Confirmation  is  the  act  which  allowed  the 
scholars  of  the  common  schools  to  leave  off  going  to 
school,  and  14  years,  or  upward,  was  the  age  requisite 
for  being  admitted  to  that  religious  act. 

According  to  the  law,  we  had  previously  to  go  to 
the  minister  several  times  a  week,  for  several  months, 
in  order  to  be  instructed  in  the  catechism.  This  regu- 
lation was  a  remnant  of  a  former  half-civilized  age. 
When  there  were  no  schools,  or  at  best  only  miserable 
ones,  this  regulation  might  have  been  very  useful  and 
necessary,  but  when  I  went  through  this  course,  there 
was  not  the  slightest  need  of  it,  and  it  seemed  espe- 
cially aggravating  to  us  college  students  thus  to  lose 
so  many  beautiful  and  valuable  hours  which  we  could 
have  spent  so  much  more  usefully  and  pleasantly. 


60 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


The  day  usually  appointed  for  confirmation  was  the 
Sunday  before  Easter,  Palm-Sunday.  On  this  day, 
after  due  preparation,  we  were  confirmed  in  the  church 
surrounded  by  a  large  crowd  of  people.  Such  a  con- 
firmation, on  the  whole,  seemed  to  fill  a  church  more 
than  anything  else ;  on  such  an  occasion  there  was 
always  a  large  congregation, in  churches  even  that  were 
on  other  Sundays  almost  empty.  From  this,  we  may 
infer  that  the  confirmation  was  considered  by  old  and 
young  as  one  of  the  most  solemn  religious  acts. 

After  the  usual  prayers  and  the  singing  of  hymns, 
the  "  Confirmandi "  ranged  themselves  in  the  aisle, 
and  the  minister  went  through  a  kind  of  examination 
or  recapitulation  of  the  instruction  during  the  preced- 
ing winter,  intended  to  give  the  scholars  an  occasion, 
by  their  answers  to  show  that  they  had  sufficient  reli- 
gious knowledge.  This  was  followed  by  an  exhorta- 
tion, in  which  the  minister  partly  addressed  the  con- 
firmandi, partly  their  parents  and  other  relations,  and 
partly  the  whole  congregation. 

Thereupon  the  minister  took  his  stand  at  the  altar  ; 
the  confirmandi  successively  came  up  to  him,  perhaps 
in  the  number  of  8  or  10,  and  knelt  round  the  altar. 
By  giving  the  right  hand  to  the  minister  they  promised 
to  keep  the  covenant,  if  I  may  thus  term  the  signifi- 
cance of  the  rite,  which,  in  other  words,  is  a  comple- 
tion and  corollary  of  baptism,  since  the  "  confirmand,, 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  61 


declares  that  he  now  acknowledges  the  validity  of 
what  has  been  done  to  him  when  an  infant ;  that  he 
now  takes  upon  himself  the  responsibility  which,  be- 
fore, rested  upon  his  sponsors  ;  that  he  will  try  to  lead 
a  true  Christian  life  &c.  Finally,  the  minister  blessed 
the  confirmandi  two  by  two,  laying  his  hands  on  their 
heads,  and  giving  them  some  cardinal  verse  from  the 
Scriptures  as  a  guide  or  as  a  treasure  by  which  to 
remember  this  moment. 

I  must,  however,  confess  that  I  have  long  ago  for- 
gotten what  verse  was  pronounced  over  me.  By  saying 
this,  I  do  not  wish  to  intimate  that  this  religious  act 
made  no  impression  upon  me.  On  the  contrary,  I 
remember  very  few  religious  acts  that  have  impressed 
me  so  deeply  as  this  one.  In  the  afternoon,  a  friend 
of  mine  and  I  planted  each,  in  a  flower-pot,  a  rose, 
which  each  of  us  kept  for  a  long  time  as  a  token  of 
remembrance.  Such  a  thing  I  have  not  done  on  any 
other  occasion  in  my  whole  life. 

What  I  have  to  object  to  this  custom,  is  this :  it 
ought  not  to  be  subjected  to  law,  but  ought  to  be  the 
result  of  an  inward  necessity  and  of  a  person's  free- 
will. 

Then  the  period  of  life  appointed  for  it,  was  not  the 
right  one.  I  do  not  think  I  was  old  enough  fully  to 
realize  the  importance  and  significance  of  the  act, 
and  I  am  sure  there  was  not  one  out  of  a  hundred 


62 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


who  was  at  that  age  more  able  than  I,  to  comprehend 
the  meaning  of  the  act,  to  meditate  on  its  consequences 
and  to  form  resolutions  adequate  to  the  circumstances. 
Moreover,  the  thing  has  its  dangers.  Besides  the 
many  who  go  thoughtlessly  through  such  a  ceremony, 
and  who  consequently  desecrate  a  solemn  rite,  there 
are  thousands  who  knowingly  and  intentionally  do  not 
keep  their  promises,  and  swear  thus  a  false  oath  before 
their  God. 

My  opinion,  therefore,  is  that  it  is  best  not  to  have 
any  such  ceremony  at  all,  and  to  leave  such  declarations, 
promises  and  resolutions  to  each  individual,  as  a  pri- 
vate affair  between  him  and  his  God.  Still,  if  some 
one  should  say  that  the  generality  of  Christians  need 
some  outward  signs  and  forms,  I  would  answer  him, 
that  I  consider  the  baptism  of  adults  alone  by  far 
superior  to  infant  baptism  combined  with  its  completion 
— compulsory  and  universal  confirmation. 

With  us,  the  confirmation  had  a  great  influence  up- 
on a  person's  social  relations  ;  directly  after  it  every 
one  was  admitted  on  an  equal  footing  to  the  different 
relations  and  branches  of  the  life  of  adults.  As  to 
religion,  that  act  was  followed  by  the  first  admission 
to  the  communion-table  which  was  again  one  of  the 
most  important  events  of  one's  whole  life.  The 
Thursday  after  Palm-Sunday  (Maundy-Thursday)  was 
the  day  appointed  for  this  act.    The  Germans  call 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  63 


that  day  Green-Thursday,  because  the  ancient  Jews 
on  that  day  ate  their  passover  with  green  herbs. 

The  young  Christian  usually  went  to  the  first  com- 
m union  together  with  his  parents,  sisters,  brothers  and 
friends.  This  made  it  the  more  solemn.  And  one 
other  thing  among  the  Lutheran  ordinances,  I  con- 
sidered to  be  especially  useful.  When  they,  after  the 
reformation,  abolished  the  auricular  confession  which 
is  still  kept  up  among  the  Catholics,  a  general  public 
confession  was  instituted  in  its  stead.  That  is,  all 
those  who  wished  on  a  certain  day  to  go  to  communion, 
met  on  the  preceding  day  at  the  church.  Here  the 
minister  addressed  them  in  such  words  as  mi^ht  be 
calculated  to  lead  his  hearers  to  a  rigid  self-examina- 
tion &c,  so  as  to  approach  the  communion-table  on  the 
following  day  with  a  contrite  heart,  with  a  humble 
mind  and  with  good  and  strong  resolutions.  But  it 
was  a  pity  that  in  many  places  a  custom  was  connected 
with  this  beneficial  preparatory  act  which  seemed  to 
me  entirely  to  spoil  the  effect  of  the  latter. 

I  went  once  to  such  a  meeting  in  a  strange  place,  and 
with  all  the  others  who  intended  to  go  to  the  commu- 
nion, I  stood  before  the  altar  listening  to  the  minister's 
address.  "When  he  had  finished,  he  turned  round  and 
laid  his  head  upon  the  altar  as  if  he  was  praying. 
At  the  same  time  the  file  of  communicants  beo*an 
to  move,  and  walked  in  procession  around  the  altar. 


64 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


I  did  not  join  the  ranks  and  stood  looking  on  in  utter 
amazement.  Soon,  however,  the  mystery  was  solved. 
When  the  leader  of  the  procession  appeared  again  on 
the  other  side  of  the  altar,  he  deposited  there  a  piece 
of  money,  and  all  the  others  followed  his  example. 
They  payed  for  their  communion,  and  the  minister 
depended  for  a  part  of  his  income  upon  the  money 
thus  raised. 

About  the  first  communion,  I  must  repeat  what  I 
said  about  confirmation.  For  the  same  reasons  it 
ought  not  to  be  such  a  general  thing,  and  young  people 
of  14  years  rarely  ought  to  be  admitted  to  it.  I  do 
not  recollect  whether  on  that  day  I  really  had  already 
investigated  the  doctrine  of  the  sacrament  of  com- 
munion ;  if  I  had,  I  could  not  well  have  joined  in  the 
communion  with  sincerity  and  in  good  faith.  At  least, 
I  do  not  recollect  ever  to  have  consciously  believed  in 
the  Lutheran  doctrine  of  co-substantiation,  and  much 
less,  therefore,  in  the  Catholic  doctrine  of  transub- 
stantiation.  How  any  sane  human  mind  ever  could 
believe  the  latter,  has  always  been  a  mystery  to  me< 
But  even  the  Lutheran  belief  of  "  receiving  Christ's 
body  in,  with  and  by  the  bread  "  does  not  seem  to  me 
much  more  comprehensible  and  acceptable  than  the 
former.  I  know,  ever  since  I  had  a  belief  of  my  own, 
I  looked  upon  communion  as  a  mere  symbolical  rite — 
according  to  the  creed  of  the  Eeformed  Church.  I 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  65 


only  went  once,  or  twice  again  to  communion,  and  that 
only,  for  the  sake  of  yielding  to  my  parents'  wishes  ; 
afterwards  my  conscience  would  not  have  allowed  me 
even  tacitly  and  practically  to  assent  to  the  Lutheran 
doctrine  of  co-substantiation. 

At  present  I  should  hardly  feel  able  with  sincerity 
to  join  in  communion  with  Christians  of  any  denomi- 
nation, at  least  if  they  call  communion  a  sacrament. 

First,  I  consider  it  to  he  of  the  greatest  importance 
that  we  should  look  upon  tenets  and  forms,  in  the 
true  light  and  spirit  of  the  Christian  religion  which 
is  expressed  in  Christ's  words,  "  the  true  worshippers 
shall  worship  the  Father  in  spirit  and  in  truth.' ' 
The  Christian  religion  is  pre-eminently  a  spiritual 
and  inward  religion,  and  does  not  depend  upon  forms 
or  types.  The  less  it  is  alloyed  with  the  latter,  the 
nobler  and  purer  it  is.  And  that  sincere  and  pure 
Christianity  can  and  does  exist  independent  of  forms, 
we  see  verified  in  the  lives  of  many  pious  Quakers. 

The  Quakers  have  discontinued  the  rite  of  com- 
munion. Among  other  things  which  justify  them  in 
doing  so,  they  adduce  the  following.  On  the  same 
occasion,  when  Christ  broke  the  bread,  he  also  washed 
the  disciples'  feet,  and  insisted  very  earnestly  upon 
their  doing  to  each  other  the  same.  Now,  if  all 
Christian  sects  agree  in  explaining  this  act  as  a  sym- 
bolical one,  and  construe  the  injunction  in  a  figurative 
5 


G6 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


sense,  why  should  not  the  other  act  of  breaking  bread 
be  explained  in  the  same  way,  since  it  is  not  any  more 
plainly  and  solemnly  performed  than  the  former? 

But  even  if  we  would  grant  that  Christ  meant  to 
institute  a  religious  rite,  which  T  verily  believe  he  did 
not  mean  to  do — even  then,  it  would  not  follow  that 
this  rite  ought  to  be  performed  in  the  mode  it  is  per- 
formed, or  rather  I  ought  to  say,  in  any  of  the  various 
modes  in  which  it  is  performed.  The  members  of  one 
denomination  believe  they  really  eat  the  body  and 
drink  the  blood  of  Christ  (what  a  shocking  idea  this 
must  seem  to  an  intelligent  "  outsider  99  who  thinks 
of  anthropophagi  as  only  living  on  some  islands  in 
the  Pacific  Ocean. ) 

The  members  of  another  denomination  believe  they 
mystically  eat  the  body  and  drink  the  blood  of  Christ, 
and  others  have  various  other,  more  or  less  exalted, 
ideas  of  the  Lord's  supper. 

Not  only  the  doctrine,  but  also  the  rite  itself  varies 
much.  Some  say  the  priest  only,  must  perform  the 
rite.  Others  consider  it  necessary  that  the  laity  should 
eat  the  bread.  Some  refuse  the  lay  members  the  wine, 
some  insist  upon  giving  it.  Some  consider  it  necessary 
to  give  the  bread  in  the  shape  of  wafers,  others  give 
pieces  of  common  household  bread.  Some  are  of  the 
opinion  that  wax-candles  must  burn  during  the  per- 
formance, others  are  opposed  to  it.    Some  think  the 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  G7 

communicants  ought  to  kneel  around  the  altar  ;  others 
think  they  may  remain  in  their  pews. 

Surely,  if  we  contemplate  all  this,  and  if  we  then 
study  the  history  of  the  Christian  Church,  we  are 
tempted  to  agree  with  an  Author  (a  Quaker)  who 
says,  "  These  ordinances  which  have  been  the  cause 
of  endless  divisions  and  contentions  and  persecutions, 
cannot  truly  appertain  to  the  law  of  God." 

I  must  repeat,  if  Christ  meant  to  institute  a  reli- 
gious rite,  he  did  not  mean  to  institute  such  a  sacra- 
ment as  the  Church  has  made  of  it.  His  command 
ought  to  he  explained  either  as  referring  merely  to 
the  annual  passover,  or  to  an  act  more  universal  and 
common  than  the  rite  of  communion.  The  example 
of  the  disciples  and  of  the  first  Christian  society  shows 
that  they  put  the  latter  construction  upon  it. 

Still,  though  I  believe  the  best  Christians  to  be  those 
who  are  pious  and  good  without  depending  upon  the 
rite  of  communion  either  for  moral  strength,  or  for 
humility  towards  God,  or  for  love  to  Christ,  I  grant 
there  are  many  Christians  who  are  really  benefited  by 
partaking  of  the  Lord's  supper,  and  we  ought  to  admit 
that  those  who  cannot  do  without  forms,  are  justified 
in  continuing  the  rite  of  communion. 

We  would  only  insist  upon  one  thing.  It  is  un- 
worthy of  an  enlightened  age,  country  and  religious 
society,  that  any  one  should  look  upon  communion  as 


63 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


anything  more  than  a  useful,  symbolical  rite.  Nobody 
ouo-ht  to  believe  that  the  mere  act  should  insure  re- 
demption,  cleanse  from  all  sins  and  open  the  gates  of 
heaven.  Much  less  ought  it  to  be  relied  upon  as  an 
indulgence  and  as  a  pretext  for  deviations  from  the 
right  path,  at  other  times.  In  Germany  I  once  knew 
a  man  who  went  one  Sunday  to  communion,  and  the 
following  Sunday  a  poaching.  I  fear,  that  He  who 
reads  clearly  the  history  of  every  human  life  and 
heart,  finds  many  such  sad  contrasts  and  inconsistencies. 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  69 


CHAPTER  V. 

V  YOUTH. 

Though  confirmation  and  first  communion,  as  I  have 
ohserved,  admitted  hoys  and  girls  into  the  ranks  of 
grown  persons,  still  they  had  not  so  much  apparent 
influence  upon  the  outward  life  of  us,  college  students, 
since  we  had  a  rank  of  our  own,  which  was  graduated 
according  to  the  class  we  "belonged  to. 

The  following  year  I  was  in  a  class  where  we  had  a 
teacher  upon  whom  I  look  as  on  a  mystery,  even  at 
the  present  day,  after  having  had  myself  so  much  ex- 
perience as  a  teacher.  He  was  less  capahle  than  any 
other  teacher  I  have  ever  seen,  to  govern,  and  morally 
or  intellectually  to  improve  his  class.  He  was  intelli- 
gent ;  at  least  I  do  not  think  that  any  scholar  ever 
suspected  him  of  not  "being  master  of  the  subject  he 
taught.  He  was  not  negligent,  for  he  performed  his 
duties  as  regularly,  and  carefully,  as  any  of  the  other 
teachers.  We  all  gave  him  the  credit  of  being  a  very 
good  man  ;  yea,  we  believed  him  to  be  strictly  a  pious, 
a  religious  person.  He  had  been  a  settled  minister, 
before  he  was  appointed  as  our  teacher,  and  we  knew 
that  he  had  been  a  less  worldly-minded  minister,  than 
any  other  in  the  whole  neighborhood.    And  still,  he 


70 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


kept  no  discipline.  It  is  incredible  what  liberties  the 
scholars  took,  what  pranks  and  tricks,  what  mischief 
and  wickedness  were  practised  in  his  classes. 

Tn  later  years,  I  have  often  thought,  and  tried  to 
find  out,  what  could  have  been  the  reason,  that  he 
failed  just  where  some  others,  an  hour  before,  or  after, 
kept  the  most  admirable  discipline.    I  have  never  been 
able  to  find  a  fully  satisfactory  explanation.    He  was 
usually  too  impassive,  too  weak,  or  "  too  good";  he 
allowed  many  things  to  pass  a  long  time  unnoticed, 
but  at  long  intervals  he  happened  to  be  roused,  and 
then  he  became  so  passionate,  that  he  lost  all  control 
over  himself.    Once  I  noticed  that  his  mouth  foamed, 
and  even  such  scenes  were  rather  a  source  of  sport 
for  the  scholars.    If  I  recollect  rightly,  he  once  fell 
upon  his  knees  and  prayed,  but  also  without  effect. 
Whether  his  want  of  strength,  and  of  the  right  degree 
of  equanimity  explains  all  this,  I  do  not  know.    I  can 
only  surmise  one  other  cause,  which  is  the  secret 
reason  of  many  failures  in  teaching,  and  in  education 
generally,  viz.,  want  of  disinterested  love  towards  the 
single  scholars ;  but  I  have  no  right  to  accuse  this 
teacher  of  such  a  want ;  on  the  contrary  I  owe  him 
much  gratitude  for  private  lessons  which  he  gave  me 
gratuitously. 

It  will  be  easily  comprehended,  that  religious  in- 
struction from  such  a  man,  could  have  no  good  effect 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  71 


on  us.  I  can  picture  hira  to  myself  as  standing  before 
us,  with  the  beautiful  book  "  Charity,  Faith,  and 
Hope  "  of  Draeseke  in  his  hand,  but  I  have  no  recollec- 
tion of  what  he  said ;  I  remember  much  better  that 
one  of  the  students  used  to  make  all  sorts  of  sport 
during  the  lessons,  of  a  picture  of  Christ,  which  was 
in  his  book. 

I  remained  only  one  year  after  my  confirmation,  in 
this  class ;  at  that  time  I  left  the  college  entirely. 
My  father  had  sent  me  there,  wishing  and  expecting 
that  I  should  study  divinity.    For  the  sake  of  doing 
this,  I  should  have  been  obliged  to  remain  two,  or 
three  years  longer  at  college,  and  then  to  go  for  three 
years  to  the  university.    Although  my  father  had  not 
the  means  of  letting  me  go  through  such  a  course  of 
studies,  still  I  could  have  done  so  ;  the  college  was 
richly  endowed,  and  was  able  always  to  assist  several 
students  throughout  their  stay  at  college  and  at  the 
university.    Sometime  before  I  left,  one  "  stipendium  " 
was  at  the  disposal  of  the  consistory,  and  it  was  offered 
to  me. 

Though  my  teachers  wished  me  to  accept  it,  though 
it  was  my  father's  desire,  one  day  to  see  me  in  the 
pulpit,  still  I  could  not  make  up  my  mind  to  enter 
upon  the  course  proposed.  I  cannot  say  that  I  had 
any  weighty  reasons  for  shunning  the  study  of  divinity, 
nor  do  I  recollect  that  my  father  required  me  to  give 


72 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


any.  When  he  saw  me  reluctant  to  remain  at  college, 
he  did  not  urge  me  any  further ;  he  was  probahly 
wise  enough  to  know  that  a  youth  ought  not  to  he 
forced  into  any  vocation  against  his  will. 

I  have  never  yet  regreted  my  perseverance,  or  my 
father's  indulgence  in  this  case.  There  is  much  pre- 
judice in  Germany  concerning  the  standing  which  a 
stay  at  the  university  gives.  I  say  a  stay,  and  not  an 
education,  for  the  college  gives  the  entire,  regular  and 
general  education.  The  university  gives  freedom. 
Some,  therefore,  learn  there  merely  what  is  necessary 
in  their  profession;  some  learn  what  they  just  happen 
to  fancy ;  others  learn  hardly  anything  at  all  except 
fencing,  drinking  beer  &c. 

The  usual  course  at  the  university  of  studying,  or 
of  neglecting  studies,  or  of  misapplying  study,  is 
particularly  very  little  calculated  to  produce  pious 
and  practical  ministers,  and  this  is  one  of  the  reasons 
why  Germany,  especially  Protestant  Germany,  has  so 
few  good,  practical  and  efficient  ministers. 

I  have,  therefore,  often  been  led  to  think  that  a 
regular  course  of  the  prescribed  studies  would  have 
made  of  me  a  minister  of  as  little  worth  as  so  many 
others,  and  I  rejoice  in  having  been  preserved  from 
this  fate.  Otherwise  I  might  have  had  reasons  to 
regret  my  course  of  action,  at  least  as  long  as  I  lived 
in  Germany ;  for  as  I  said,  the  bare  fact  of  having 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY. 


73 


been  at  the  university  procures  many  worldly  privi- 
leges, some  of  which  another  person  never  can  enjoy. 
And  those  even  that  he  can  reach,  he  has  to  conquer 
by  great  perseverance,  or  extraordinary  qualities  and 
attainments. 

I  left  college  with  the  intention  of  preparing  my- 
self in  the  regular  and  established  way,  at  the  Teach- 
ers' Seminary  of  the  State,  for  the  profession  of 
teaching.  At  this  institution  they  received  new 
students  only  once  every  two  years,  and  in  expectation 
of  such  a  new  term  I  spent  an  intervening  space  of 
six  months  at  home.  Once  or  twice  every  week  I 
went  to  town  to  take  private  lessons  from  my  former 
teachers  ;  on  the  other  week  days,  I  made  some  at- 
tempts at  teaching  under  my  father's  guidance.  On 
Sundays  I  went  to  church,  but  more  for  the  sake  of 
playing  the  organ,  than  from  any  other  motive. 

The  time  I  spent  subsequently  at  the  Teachers' 
Seminary  was  one  of  the  most  influential  periods  of 
my  life,  as  far  as  my  religious  education  is  concerned. 
Just  as  in  all  the  other  branches,  our  religious  in- 
struction had  two  aims  ;  the  one  to  develop  us  individ- 
ually for  our  own  sake  ;  the  other  to  impart  to  us,  or 
to  develop  in  us  all  the  sentiments,  knowledge  and 
skill  that  would  enable  us  to  be  good  teachers. 

We  had  one  teacher  of  religion  who  was  not  a 
minister  and  who  taught  us  only  the  methodical  part 


74 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


of  religious  instruction,  i.  e.  the  way  of  forming  the 
plan  of  a  catichization  ;  the  way  of  forming  good 
questions,  of  making  the  right  use  of  a  scholar's 
answer,  of  adapting  the  right  words  to  the  different 
subjects,  times,  scholars  &c.  &c. 

A  second  teacher  (he  was  one  of  the  grandduke's 
chaplains)  seemed  to  me  to  be  appointed  to  teach 
us  religion,  for  the  sake  of  making  us  religious.  If 
he  was,  he  missed  his  aim,  or  rather  was  faithless  to 
his  task,  because  he  gave  us  all  the  impression  (by  his 
yawning,  by  his  listless  behavior  and  attitude  &c.) 
that  he  was  not  with  heart  and  soul  engaged  in  his 
business.    So  it  could  not  but  be  a  failure. 

A  third  teacher  (he  was  also  court  chaplain  and  the 
director  of  our  Seminary)  taught  us  Bible  and  ecclesi- 
astical history.  He  was  seriously  engaged  in  what  he 
taught,  and  had,  therefore,  a  decided  influence  upon 
all  of  us.  According  to  the  bent  of  mind  of  the  dif- 
ferent students  he  made  some  very  orthodox,  and  some 
perhaps  more  heterodox  than  they  would  have  been 
without  his  teaching.  He  himself  was  a  very  orthodox 
Lutheran.  He  believed  and  taught  that  the  Mosaic 
account  of  the  Creation,  of  its  six  days,  &c,  were  to 
be  understood  literally  ;  he  believed  that  Moses  had 
known  more  of  natural  sciences,  than  we  moderns, 
and  was,  therefore,  right  in  saying  that  God  created 
the  light  on  the  first  day,  but  the  sun,  moon,  and  star:; 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY. 


75 


on  the  fourth  day,  (the  light  being  a  substance  in- 
dependent of  the  heavenly  bodies.)  He  taught  us 
that  Balaam's  ass  really  had  spoken  ;  that  the  sun 
really  had  stood  still  to  give  Joshua  time  to  fight  his 
battle,  which  fact,  he  said,  was  corroborated  by  Chinese 
records. 

These  few  instances  will  be  sufficient  to  give  an 
idea  of  the  spirit  in  which  this  teacher  tried  to  influence 
us.  He  did  not  carry  me  the  whole  length  of  his 
views.  On  the  contrary,  he  awakened  in  me  the 
spirit  of  investigation  and  of  doubt,  if  it  had  not  been 
awake  before.  I  do  not  think  that  I  was  conscious  at, 
or  before  that  time,  of  wishing  to  avoid  all  error, 
superstition,  and  hypocrisy,  and  I  am  sure  I  did  not 
wish  to  throw  off  the  imaginary,  or  real  yoke  of  a 
certain  creed,  or  sect.  But  a  spontaneous  impulse,  or 
various  influences  led  me  to  take  my  own  views. 

I  recollect,  one  day  while  walking  with  a  friend,  I 
said  that  "  Father,  Son,  and  Holy  Ghost,"  certainly 
were  only  three  different  names  for  three  different 
activities  or  influences  of  one  single  being.  My  friend 
thought  he  agreed  with  me,  but  he  would  not  like  to 
hear  me  say  the  same  thing  in  the  presence  of  our 
teachers  who  did  not  think  so.  At  that  time,  I  had 
never  heard  of  the  distinction  between  Unitarians  and 
Trinitarians,  but  my  mind  proved  thus  to  have  a 
direction  even  then,  which  would  not  make  it  doubtful 


76 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


which  of  the  two  parties  I  should  prefer  in  later  years. 

Our  fourth  teacher  of  religion  was  the  general 
Superintendent  of  the  churches  and  schools,  and  as 
such  the  supervisor  of  our  Seminary. 

He  was  a  rationalist,  and  prohahly  from  fear  that 
we  might  be  too  much  under  opposite  influences  he 
undertook  to  instruct  us — nominally  in  catechetics, 
hut  effectually  in  anything  he  just  happened  to  hit 
upon.  He  engaged  us  in  dialogues  on  theological 
subjects,  on  education,  on  fine  arts,  &c.  &c,  and  his 
mode  of  instruction  was  most  captivating  and  effective  ; 
he  knew  how  to  make  us  think  and  speak.  His  lessons 
always  seemed  to  be  too  short,  too  few,  and  too  far 
between. 

In  a  model  school  which  was  connected  with  the 
Seminary,  we  made,  one  after  the  other,  attempts  at 
giving  religious  and  other  instruction,  and  derived 
great  benefit  from  the  advice,  hints,  and  criticisms  of 
our  teachers,  who  were  present  during  these  exercises. 
In  tbe  Seminary,  we  had  regular  morning  and  evening 
devotions,  and  a  part  of  our  musical  instruction  was 
dedicated  to  the  singing  of  hymns  in  four  parts.  The 
latter  I  recollect,  made  sometimes  really  a  solemn 
impression  on  my  mind. 

On  Sundays  we  were  obliged  to  go  once  to  church. 
The  city  (Oldenburg)  contained  only  one  Lutheran 
church,  though  almost  all  its  eight  thousand  inhabi- 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY. 


77 


tants  were  Lutherans.  There  were  two  services  in  the 
morning,  and  one  in  the  afternoon.  The  sixty  students 
of  the  Seminary  were  divided  into  four  divisions. 
These  had  to  go  alternately,  one  to  the  first,  two  to 
the  second,  and  one  to  the  third  service — avowedly  for 
the  purpose  of  leading  the  singing. 

In  order  to  complete  my  sketch  of  the  religious  in- 
fluences of  this  period  of  my  life,  I  must  add  one 
thing,  which  will  tend  to  prove  that  we  are  all  more 
or  less  the  children  of  our  time,  of  our  country,  and 
of  chance.  We  students  at  the  Seminary  whose  every 
movement  was  ordered  and  regulated  by  one  of  the 
most  orthodox  and  pious  ministers  of  the  country — we 
were  allowed  now  and  then  to  go  to  the  theatre  on 
Sundays,  but  on  no  other  evening  in  the  week. 

After  a  stay  of  eighteen  months,  I  was  permitted  to 
leave  the  Seminary,  and  to  accept  the  situation  of 
private  tutor  in  the  family  of  a  civil  officer  who  was 
chief  magistrate,  or  judge  in  the  most  southern  county 
of  the  State.  The  inhabitants  of  this  portion  of  the 
state  were  all  Catholics  ;  only  the  family  with  which  I 
was  to  live,  and  a  few  other  persons  were  Protestants. 

I  sent  my  baggage  to  my  place  of  destination,  and 
set  out  alone  to  travel  the  distance  of  sixty  miles  on 
foot.  Towards  the  close  of  the  first  day,  I  had  to 
traverse  a  heath,  where  there  were  no  houses  and  hard- 
ly any  trees  in  sight,  on  either  side  of  the  turnpike. 


78 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


In  the  midst  of  this  heath,  at  some  distance  from  the 
turnpike,  one  sees  a  large  number  of  enormous  unhewn 
stones  placed  in  two  rows.  The  legend  calls  them  the 
Bride  of  Visbeck. 

It  is  told  that  a  young  lady  in  the  parish  of  Visbeck 
was  urged  by  her  parents  to  marry  a  young  man  whom 
she  did  not  like.  She  declined,  remonstrated,  refused, 
but  all  in  vain ;  her  parents  insisted  upon  it.  The 
day  for  the  wedding  was  appointed ;  the  bridegroom 
and  the  guests  repaired  to  the  bride's  house  ;  the  bride, 
though  she  declared  she  would  rather  be  turned  into 
stone,  than  to  be  married  to  that  unwelcome  lover, 
was  dressed  in  bridal  attire ;  a  procession  was  formed, 
and  the  whole  company  set  out  to  walk,  two  by  two, 
to  the  church.  But  lo  !  on  their  way  the  bride's  wish 
was  fulfilled  ;  all  at  once  the  whole  company  were 
turned  into  stone ;  and  there  they  stand  now,  for  cen- 
turies, just  as  their  fate  overtook  them. 

The  fact  is,  one  finds  here  and  there  in  that  region 
several  similar  collections  of  stones,  and  sometimes 
there  are  several  large  stones  in  the  midst  between  the 
others,  arranged  as  if  they  were  intended  to  form  a 
rude  altar.  Historians  affirm  that  here  the  ancient 
Germans  held  their  assemblies,  and  performed  their 
sacrifices  in  accordance  with  the  description  Tacitus  and 
later  writers  give  of  them. 

Without  taking  these  historical  recollections  into 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  79 


consideration,  one  is  apt  to  be  peculiarly  affected  by 
the  appearance  of  such  a  large  heath  as  I  then 
crossed  ;  and  as  I,  moreover,  was  somewhat  excited  by 
the  expectation  of  what  I  knew  to  be  before  me,  this 
lonely  walk  of  about  six  miles  over  the  heath,  is  one 
of  the  most  interesting  among  the  recollections  of  the 
many  excursions  and  rambles  I  have  enjoyed,  during 
my  life,  as  a  pedestrian. 

When  I  emerged  from  this  solitary  waste,  I  was  in 
a  Catholic  country.  Near  the  first  village  I  saw  a 
crucifix  on  the  road  side. 

I  knew  from  books  how  much  reverence  the  Catho- 
lics showed  to  these  images,  which  are  not  only  found 
in  the  churches,  and  in  small  chapels  outside  of  towns 
and  villages,  but  are  also  erected  by  private  persons 
anywhere,  on  the  road  side,  or  in  the  midst  of  their 
fields.  I  did  not  know  whether  it  was  safe  for  a  stran- 
ger to  deviate  from  the  usual  custom  of  making  a  cross, 
or  of  taking  off  one's  hat ;  still  my  feelings  revolted 
against  such  an  act  of  homage  to  an  image.  I  looked 
shyly  around,  and  when  I  saw  no  one  near  enough  to 
notice  me,  I  followed  my  inclination  and  passed  by 
"  straight  as  an  arrow." 

This  first  success  gave  me  courage,  and  I  did  not 
comply  with  the  custom  mentioned.  I  found  afterwards 
that  my  Catholic  friends  and  acquaintances,  at  least, 
did  not  expect  me  to  do  as  they  did  ;  except  perhaps  to 


80 


THE  PROBLEM  OE  LIFE,  OH 


take  off  my  hat,  when  passing  a  funeral,  or  one  of  the 
grand  processions  that  marched  on  certain  holy  days 
through  the  streets  hehind  the  host,  which  was  carried 
in  pomp  by  priests  walking  under  a  baldachin. 

Such  an  expectation  I  found  reasonable,  especially 
if  I  put  myself  into  the  way  of  such  things.  Then 
and  ever  since,  I  have  considered  it  my  duty,  if  possi- 
ble, not  to  hurt  any  one's  feelings,  or  to  disturb  his 
devotions  by  not  complying  with  the  established  forms 
and  rites.  If  it  was  my  own  free  will,  perhaps  even 
mere  curiosity,  that  led  me  to  be  present  at  other  peo- 
ple's religious  performances,  I  thought  they  had  a 
right,  either  to  make  me  comply  with  their  customs, 
or  to  expel  me.  If  I  was  forced  by  circumstances  to 
be  present  at  such  performances,  I  thought  it  was  lau- 
dable to  behave  like  the  rest,  if  I  did  so  without  being 
guilty  of  hypocrisy,  i.  e.  if  I  did  not  wish  from  selfish 
motives  to  appear  pious,  but  wished  not  to  give  offence, 
or  to  be  injurious  to  children,  or  to  grown  persons  of  a 
childlike  faith.  I  have,  therefore,  with  a  pure  con- 
science knelt  as  well  at  that  time  in  Catholic  churches, 
as  in  later  years  during  public  and  private  devotions 
of  Episcopalians. 

About  six  miles  from  my  new  residence  there  was  a 
small  Protestant  congregation.  I  sometimes  went 
over,  induced  by  a  feeling  of  equality,  to  pay  a  visit  to 
their  teacher,  and  several  times  I  also  stopped  at  the 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  81 

minister's  house.  The  latter  and  his  wife  were  both 
from  the  same  part  of  the  state  wmere  I  came  from. 
If  I  may  say  so,  they  did  not  feel  much  at  home  in 
this  oasis  in  a  large  Catholic  desert,  and  they  felt  the 
need  of  communing  with  congenial  and  kindred  spirits. 
They  received  me,  therefore,  always  very  kindly,  and 
we  had  many  a  pleasant  conversation  which  naturally 
often  turned  upon  the  difference  between  Catholicism 
and  Protestantism. 

The  Protestants  and  Catholics  of  this  village  made 
use  of  the  same  church.  The  latter  who  were  the  more 
numerous,  used  it  Sunday  mornings  before  eleven 
o'clock,  and  in  the  evening.  The  former  held  their 
service  a  little  before  noon,  and  contented  themselves 
with  a  little,  very  modest  looking  altar  which  was  erect- 
ed at  some  distance  from  the  more  splendid  Catholic 
altar. 

On  the  whole,  I  did  not  go  over  very  often  to  attend 
this  Protestant  worship.  I  went  more  frequently  to 
the  Catholic  church  of  the  place  where  I  resided.  Here 
I  found  the  services  for  several  reasons  much  more  at- 
tractive. It  is  true,  up  to  this  time  my  life  had  been 
a  very  happy  one,  but  it  had  rather  lacked  an  element 
which  I  might  call  a  combination  of  beauty,  poetry, 
romance  and  sensualism. 

I  had  been  born  and  raised  in  a  fertile  region  where 
the  fields  showed  for  a  few  summer  months,  the  most 
6 


82 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


exuberant  beauty  of  plenty  and  utility,  but  nothing 
else.  I  had  never  seen  a  hill,  had  never  seen  during 
my  childhood  a  collection  of  trees  larger  than  an  or- 
chard. I  had  been  a  few  times  on  the  sea-shore,  but 
had  never  seen  any  fresh  water  except  in  ditches  and 
sluggish  canals.  My  education  had  been  plain,  though 
in  no  wise  puritanical.  The  religious  ceremonies  and 
other  such  things  that  I  had  witnessed,  were  not  calcu- 
lated to  develop  the  element  I  have  spoken  of.  Almost 
all  the  inhabitants  of  that  region  bore  in  their  char- 
acter, temperament,  customs  and  usages  the  impress 
of  their  climate,  soil,  institutions  &c. 

It  is  true,  I  had  been  under  the  influence  of  some 
circumstances  which  could  not  fail  to  develop  the  im- 
agination and  an  appreciating  sense  of  the  beautiful. 
In  my  childhood  my  mind  had  been  nourished  with 
fairy  tales  which  are  certainly,  though  untrue,  yet  ad- 
missible and  even  useful  if  they  do  not  inculcate  really 
superstitious  and  irreligious  views  and  sentiments. 
When  I  was  about  eleven  years  old,  there  came  a  re- 
spectable troop  of  actors  into  our  place.  Some  of  the 
members  were  admitted  into  private  society,  and  some 
private  persons  assisted  them  as  amateurs  to  perform 
large  pieces.  The  directress  obtained  from  my  parents 
the  permission  for  me  to  take  some  appropriate  part 
of  some  plays.  I  desired  nothing  more  than  this,  and 
entered  into  it  with  great  enthusiasm. 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  83 


I  was  thus  made  familiar  with  the  stage  and  with 
dramatic  poetry,  and  was  led  to  read  the  whole  of 
Schiller's  works  in  a  very  short  time.  This  I  suppose 
was  the  cause  of  my  taking  it  into  my  head  at  the 
age  of  fourteen  years,  to  write  a  tragedy  in  four  acts 
for  a  school  exercise.  My  teacher  declared  it  to  be  a 
very  successful  attempt,  except  "  in  the  love  scenes." 

Moreover,  I  had  seen  a  few  castles,  the  remnants  of 
feudal  times  which  led  my  mind  to  the  contemplation 
of  the  middle  ages,  so  full  of  chivalry  and  romance. 
In  the  town  where  I  went  to  college,  there  was  a  castle 
with  a  tower  180  feet  high  and  over  600  years  old. 
saw  near  it  the  entrance  of  a  subterranean  passage 
which  was  said  to  lead  one  for  4  miles  below  the  ground. 
But  nobody  attempted  to  verify  it.  About  this  as 
about  other  similar  things  there  were  wonderful  stories 
afloat.  In  spite  of  all  such  things,  however,  I  think 
I  was  surrounded  in  my  younger  years  more  by  pro- 
saic than  by  poetic  influences. 

Now  all  at  once  I  was  transported  into  a  region 
where  the  landscape  was  beautifully  varied.  I  could 
sit  in  the  shades  of  a  grove,  could  muse  on  the  banks 
of  a  murmuring  brook,  could  wander  through  lovely 
vales  and  climb  on  hills  which  seemed  to  me  immensely 
high,  could  look  out  upon  a  distant  lake  and  beyond 
upon  a  beautiful  mountain  range,  could  gather,  exam- 
ine and  admire  flowers  which  I  had  never  seen  before, 


84 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


could  at  night,  for  the  first  time  in  my  life,  listen  to 
the  sweet  and  melancholy  sounds  of  the  nightingale, 
which  sang  below  my  window  in  the  garden,  and  very 
soon  I  could  satisfy  the  longing  which  the  aspect  of 
the  distant  mountains  awakened  in  me. 

During  a  pedestrian  excursion,  I  visited,  among 
others,  the  ancient  cities  of  Osnabruck  and  Minden, 
and  saw  the  Porta  Westphalica,  one  of  the  most  beau- 
tiful mountain  sceneries  in  Germany,  formed  around 
the  Weser  which  flows  here  at  right  angles  through  a 
gap  in  the  mountain  range.  I  recollect  I  said  in  a 
description  of  this  journey :  If  an  atheist  should 
stand  on  this  mountain  top  and  look  upon  the  land- 
scape around  him,  I  think  he  would  bend  his  knee  in 
adoration.,  and  confess  there  is  a  God,  there  must  be  a 
God  who  made  this  great,  beautiful  and  wonderful 
globe. 

The  people  with  whom  I  associated  about  this  time, 
were  under  the  influence  of  a  different  religion,  climate 
and  soil,  and  seemed  to  me  less  cold,  prosaic,  material 
and  matter  of  fact  than  those  of  my  native  province. 

I  felt  that  this  change  had  a  great  effect  on  me,  and 
the  more  so,  because  I  had  attained  just  that  age, 
(about  17  years)  when  a  person  must  be  influenced  by 
such  a  change  if  he  is  susceptible  at  all.  I  know  I 
have  been  visionary  enough  at  different  times  of  my 
life, but  never  very  poetic  and  romantic.    Still  if  ever 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY. 


85 


a  spark  of  such  a  quality  appeared  in  my  life,  it  must 
have  been  at  this  time.  And  really  it  never  was  more 
perceptible  than  at  this  period. 

I  liked,  therefore>  to  attend  the  Catholic  church.  I 
liked  to  look  upon  the  large  congregation  which 
thronged  the  spacious  edifice,  and  filled  every  corner 
and  passage.  I  liked  to  hear  the  solemn  chanting  of 
the  priest  if  he  had  "  music  in  him  I  liked  to  see  the 
thousands  of  people  kneel  in  apparent  humility,  at  a 
given  sign  ;  I  liked  the  momentary  deep  silence  during 
the  offering  of  the  host,  interrupted  now  and  then  by 
the  clear  sound  of  the  bell,  while  burning  incense 
seemed  to  transport  one  into  another  sphere  ;  I  liked 
to  hear  the  strains  of  sacred  song  arising  in  unison 
from  thousands  of  voices.  Especially  did  I  like  during 
passion  week  to  go  to  church  in  the  evening,  to  seat 
myself  in  a  corner  of  the  unilluminated  edifice,  to  see 
the  priest  and  a  dozen  of  acolytes  approach  the  altar, 
to  hear  the  latter  sing  a  Latin  hymn,,  and  to  see  them 
kneel  around  the  altar,  dressed  in  white  robes,  and 
burning  wax  candles  in  their  hands. 

Truly  there  is  a  certain  stage  of  development,  a 
certain  state  of  the  mind  and  heart  to  which  the  Cath- 
olic service  is  admirably  adapted.  I  did  not  wonder, 
therefore,  that  my  pupils  liked  to  go  to  the  Catholic 
church,  nor  did  I  ever  try  to  dissuade  them  from  ac- 
companying me.    On  the  whole  I  liked  the  country, 


86 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


the  people,  and  many  of  their  customs  and  institutions 
so  much  that  the  time  I  spent  there,  was  one  of  the 
happiest  periods  of  my  life,  and  that  I  should  have 
liked  to  prolong  it,  perhaps  to  the  end  of  my  days. 

Nevertheless  I  can  say  that  I  never  was  tempted  to 
become  a  Catholic.  My  mind  was  too  far  developed  to 
be  made  a  captive  by  appearances.  Though  at  that 
time  the  Catholic  forms  might  seem  to  be  congenial 
to  me,  still,  I  could  not  accept  them  connected  with 
and  inseparable  from  such  monstrous  superstition  as  I 
knew  the  Catholic  creed  embodied  and  enforced.  On 
the  contrary,  by  observation,  meditation,  arguments, 
and  occasional  conversation  with  priests  and  laymen, 
my  protestant  views  became  clearer,  more  decided  and 
deeply  rooted. 

Catholicism  is  for  an  enlightened  and  well  disposed 
mind,  a  sad  subject  to  dwell  upon.  Without  doubt  it 
has  a  good  and  salutary  element  within  it.  I  cannot 
help  thinking  that  God  would  not  have  allowed  it  to 
exist  so  many  centuries,  and  still  to  extend  over  the 
greater  part  of  Christian  lands,  if  it  did  not  serve  some 
great  end  in  the  development  of  the  human  race ;  I 
am  almost  inclined  to  say,  if  it  was  not  in  itself  wor- 
thy to  exist.  Surely  it  has  aided  millions  of  human 
beings  to  lead  a  pious  and  useful  life,  and  to  die  in 
peace  with  God,  with  the  world,  and  with  themselves. 
And  if  these  millions  were  guided  and  comforted  by 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  87 


a  delusive  and  superstitious  faith,  what  right  have  we 
to  take  exception  at  it  ?  The  only  condemnable  idola- 
try, as  Carlyle  says,  is  insincere  idolatry. 

On  the  other  hand,  if  we  read  the  history  of  the 
church  and  see  what  cruelties  and  crimes  Catholicism 
is  guilty  of ;  if  we  examine  the  present  spiritual,  social 
and  political  condition  of  the  Catholic  nations  on  the 
earth ;  if  we  consider  what  dangerous,  incredible  and 
monstrous  things  the  Catholic  church  forces  individuals 
to  believe  and  to  practise  (transubstantiation,  purga- 
tory, indulgences,  and  remission,  celibacy  &c.) — really 
we  cannot  help  feeling  sad  at  the  existence  of  Cathol- 
icism. If  it  could  be  purged  of  its  enormities  so  that 
a  priest  could  be,  at  the  same  time,  a  priest  and  a  think- 
ing and  sincerely  pious  man  ;  so  that  a  layman  could 
be  a  good  Catholic  and  a  sincere,  divinely  rational 
being ;  then  I  should  say,  let  Catholicism  exist  until 
the  end  of  the  world  as  the  best  religion  for  children, 
and  for  adults  in  the  lowest  stage  of  spiritual  develop- 
ment. But  if  Catholicism  pretends  that  it  is  right 
and  perfect,  as  it  now  exists ;  if  it  fears  to  fall  as  soon 
as  it  changes  one  iota  of  its  tenets  ;  then  I  should  wish 
it  would  fall  as  soon  as  possible,  and  be  swept  from 
the  earth  and  out  of  man's  recollection. 

After  having  resided  about  eighteen  months  in 
the  midst  of  .  a  Catholic  community,  I  applied  to 
the  director  of  the  Seminary  for  another  situation. 


83 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


The  government  did  not  usually  furnish  private  fami- 
lies with  teachers,  and  I  had  only  been  excused  from 
teaching  in  the  schools  of  the  State,  principally  on 
account  of  my  health.  Since  the  latter  now  allowed 
me  to  teach  larger  classes,  I  considered  it  my  duty  to 
enter  into  the  public  service  for  which  I  had  been 
educated.  I  was  sent  to  a  hamlet  where  the  services 
of  a  teacher  were  only  needed  for  the  winter. 

My  new  situation  seemed  to  be  destined  exactly  to 
force  me  into  continuing  my  meditations  and  obser- 
vations on  the  various  religious  sects.  The  place  was 
situated  just  on  the  confines  of  the  catholic  and  prot- 
estant  sections  of  the  State.  One  or  two  miles  towards 
the  west,  there  was  a  village  in  which  a  protestant, 
and  a  catholic  teacher  resided.  I  walked  over  once 
or  twice  every  week,  and  met  these  two  colleagues 
with  whom  I  spent  my  time  very  profitably. 

On  Sundays  I  sometimes  went  to  a  village  situated 
five  miles  south  of  us.  There  I  met  with  a  most 
remarkable  fact :  the  Catholics  and  Protestants  used 
the  same  church,  together,  and  at  the  same  time. 
The  services  were  opened  by  the  first  part  of  the 
mass  ;  thereupon  the  Protestants  sang  a  hymn,  which 
was  selected  by  their  school-teacher  (for  they  had  no 
minister  of  their  own) ;  then  the  mass  was  continued, 
and  after  the  Protestants  had  again  sung  one  of  their 
hymns,  the  priest  finished  the  mass,  and  finally 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  89 

preached  a  sermon  to  both  parties  together.  What  I 
heard  there,  was  quite  reasonable,  and  on  the  whole, 
the  parties  got  along  quite  well  together,  at  that  time, 
though  there  had  been  occasional  disputes  and  scuffles, 
even  in  the  church  itself. 

On  other  Sundays  I  went  to  the  church  of  our 
parish,  situated  four  miles  north  of  our  hamlet. 
There  I  spent  some  delightful  clays.  The  teacher  (at 
the  same  time  organist)  with  whom  I  associated,  was 
one  of  the  most  genial  persons  I  ever  met  with.  1 
often  remained  over  night  at  his  house  ;  we  read  and 
conversed  much  together,  and  became  very  familiar, 
and  I  think  useful  to  each  other.  I  never  shall  forget 
one  remark  he  happened  to  make  to  me.  I  wish  and 
hope,  said  he,  that  you  sometime  will  become  very 
unhappy.  His  wish  has  been  fulfilled,  and  I  have 
often  thought  whether  my  fate  produced  the  effect 
which  I  supposed  he  hoped  from  it. 

My  attendance  at  public  worship  I  recollect  to  have 
been  sometimes  not  entirely  without  effect.  My 
friend  had  a  great  talent  for  music,  and  he  played  the 
organ  in  an  edifying  style.  The  minister  preached 
better  than  most  of  those  that  I  had  heard  before. 
He  was  a  learned  man,  and  I  received  some  useful 
information  from  him  in  private  conversation.  He 
was  the  first  minister  whom  I  heard  venturing  to  say, 
for  instance,  that  the  Mosaic  account  of  the  Creation 


90 


TIIE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


ought  not  to  be  explained  literally ;  that  the  word 
"deluge"  was  not  "  siindfluth  (a  flood  to  punish 
sins,  a  universal  flood)  but "  sindfluth  "  (derived  from 
the  Syrian,  or  some  other  oriental  language  and 
merely  signifying  a  large  flood.) 

The  remainder  of  my  leisure  time  during  this 
winter  I  spent  in  close  study  and  in  solitary  walks ; 
on  the  whole,  I  think  very  beneficially.  A  journal 
which  I  began  to  keep,  gave  at  least  a  slight  evidence 
of  thought  and  general  development. 

In  this  situation  as  well  as  in  the  preceding  and  in 
several  succeeding  ones,  my  attention  was  particularly 
directed  to  the  investigation  of  religious  subjects,  and 
I  studied  very  carefully  several  commentaries  of  the 
Bible,  and  other  practical  and  theoretical  works  on 
religion.  I  did  this  not  from  any  inward  necessity, 
or  inclination  to  piety,  but  merely  because  it  was  in- 
cluded in  a  careful  and  conscientious  preparation  for 
my  daily  business. 

In  the  Spring  one  of  my  former  teachers  at  the 
Seminary  who  had  always  taken  a  great  interest  in 
me,  induced  me  again  to  accept  a  situation  as  private 
tutor.  In  a  town  just  about  half  way  between  my 
parents'  residence  and  the  capital  of  the  State,  there 
was  a  very  wealthy  man  who  intended  to  let  his  son, 
a  part  of  the  time,  go  to  a  high  school,  which  had  been 
newly  established  in  the  place ;  he  wished,  however, 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY. 


91 


to  keep  a  private  tutor  besides,  who  might  he  a  com- 
panion for  the  boy  and  try  to  conquer  his  very  decided 
dislike  against  study. 

My  patron  thought,  if  I  accepted  this  place,  I  might 
become  connected  with  the  high-school,  which  he  be- 
lieved to  be  the  right  place  for  me.  I  found  my  new 
situation  in  many  respects  a  delightful  one.  My 
salary  was  very  liberal ;  my  accommodations  comfort- 
able, even  splendid,  and  the  attendance  exceedingly 
good ;  only  a  small  portion  of  my  time  seriously 
occupied  ;  my  access  to  refined  society  directly  and 
indirectly  facilitated  through  the  family  with  whom  I 
resided.  Still  the  time  I  spent  there,  was  one  of  the 
most  unhappy  periods  of  my  life.  Several  circum- 
stances combined  to  deprive  me  of  all  peace  of  mind, 
and  where  that  is  wanting,  it  would  seem  to  me  im- 
possible ever  to  be  happy  through  fortunate  outward 
circumstances. 

First,  I  did  not  succeed  in  making  my  pupil  like 
his  studies.  I  tried  hard  enough  to  teach  him,  but 
my  character  was  not  calculated  to  attract  him,  and 
to  carry  him  along  with  me,  through  liveliness,  mirth 
and  childlike  simplicity,  nor  could  I  subdue  the  boy 
into  passive  obedience  and  willingness,  through  stern- 
ness, firmness,  and  manly  superiority.  Several  years 
afterwards,  when  I  resided  in  another  town,  this  pupil 
of  mine  called  on  me,  and  his  behavior  showed  that 


'92 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


he  wished  me  well  and  had  learned  to  appreciate  what 
I  had  tried  to  do  for  him.  But  while  I  was  his  teacher, 
our  relation  became  less  and  less  satisfactory. 

Secondly,  it  was  every  teacher's  duty  to  show  his 
appointment  to  the  minister  of  the  place,  in  which  he 
was  to  reside.  The  minister  was  ex  officio  the  inspector 
of  his  school,  and  to  the  minister  he  was,  for  several 
years,  obliged  every  three  months  to  show  an  essay 
of  his  own.  Now  with  the  church  of  this  town,  there 
were  connected  two  ministers. 

Unfortunately  my  employer  introduced  me  to  the 
second,  and  not  to  the  first.  The  former  was  a  genial 
person,  and  with  him  I  remained  on  good  terms, 
though  I  wrote  occasionally  a  few  things  in  my  essays 
which  he  did  not  like.  The  latter,  however,  was  a 
cold,  domineering  man,  and  could  not  brook  the  slight- 
est sign  of  neglect,  or  of  independence.  Moreover, 
I  suspect  he  knew  about  my  wish  of  being  connected 
with  the  high  school  which  was  under  his  direction ; 
incautiously  I  had  spoken  of  it  to  a  protege  of  his, 
who  unexpectedly  feared  me  as  a  rival. 

With  the  good  intention  of  making  up  for  former 
neglect,  and  of  originating  at  the  same  time  a  good 
work,  I  had  handed  to  this  minister  one  of  my  essays, 
about  Sunday  schools  for  apprentices.  But  instead  of 
accepting  and  viewing  it  kindly,  he  tried  to  use  it  as 
a  means  of  crushing  me. 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  93 


He  impeached  my  motives  for  writing  it ;  put  a 
wrong  construction  on  some  parts  of  it ;  on  the  whole 
criticised  it  in  the  hitterest  and  most  malicious  way. 
This  criticism  did  me  good,  because  it  roused  me  to  a 
deeper  investigation  of  the  disputed  points  and'  to  the 
writing  of  a  replication,  and  gave  me  more  firmness, 
independence  and  prudence.  On  the  other  hand, 
however,  it  caused  me  great  sorrow,  about  being  mis- 
understood, and  I  fear  it  also  raised  in  me  the  spirit 
of  bitter  opposition  to  the  unjust  and  galling  yoke  of 
clercial  dominion,  under  which  most  of  the  teachers 
in  Germany  were  chafing  with  more  or  less  intensity. 

Thirdly,  during  my  sojourn  among  Catholics  the 
spirit  of  negation  had  been  fostered  in  me,  and  into 
this  direction  my  mind  was  turned  more  decidedly  at 
this  time  by  the  reading  of  Eousseau's  Emile.  I  will 
not  condemn  this  book  for  I  know  how  much  good  it 
has  done  in  the  world.  At  present  I  can  read  it  with 
composure,  and  pleasure,  and  without  danger.  At 
that  time,  however,  I  was  too  young  to  comprehend  it 
fully,  and  I  was  not  in  the  right  state  of  mind  to  be 
benefited  by  it. 

With  books  it  is  as  with  music,  with  food,  medicine, 
and  many  other  things  ;  the  same  thing  does  not  agree 
with  eve^body.  The  same  thing  does  not  even  have 
at  all  times  the  same  effect  upon  the  same  individual. 
Eousseau's  Emile  led  me  at  that  time  only  further 


94 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


into  doubts  about  man's  destiny,  duties  and  rights, 
into  doubts  about  his  relations  to  God,  and  to  his 
fellow-men. 

These  and  perhaps  some  other  influences  all  together 
spurred  me  on  to  aspire  to  higher  things,  but  I  hardly 
think  that  my  feelings  deserved  a  better  name  than 
pride,  or  ambition.  I  wrote  to  my  father  that  I  could 
no  longer  be  satisfied  with  myself  and  my  condition, 
and  asked  him,  if  he  could  not  do  more,  at  least  to 
let  me  study  for  a  year  at  Diesterweg's  celebrated 
Seminary  in  Berlin,  or  to  allow  me  to  come  home,  and 
to  stay  there  a  year  occupied  in  nothing  but  studying. 
My  father,  however,  would  not  accede  to  any  of  my 
wishes,  and  desired  T  might  remain  in  my  advantage- 
ous situation. 

I  held  out  for  sometime  longer  until  my  state  of 
mind  became  utterly  intolerable  to  me.  I  told  my 
employer  that  I  wished  to  leave,  because  I  thought 
his  son  would  be  benefited  by  only  and  fully  attending 
the  high  school.  I  was  told  they  were  well  satisfied 
with  me,  and  was  urged  to  remain.  This  gentleman 
on  the  whole,  always  treated  me  very  kindly,  as  he 
did  everybody  else.  He  seemed  to  be  a  very  good 
man,  though  he  never  went  to  church,  nor,  if  I  surmise 
rightly,  had  any  positive  religious  belief.  Several 
years  afterwards  he  was  led  into  commercial  and  in- 
dustrial undertakings,  and  lost  the  greater  part  of 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  95 


his  property.  He  was  said  then  to  have  attempted 
suicide,  which  I  lamented  very  much,  since  it  might 
prove  that  in  prosperity  he  had  only  heen  good  from 
habit,  or  from  weakness. 

I  persisted  in  my  resolution  to  give  up  my  situation, 
and  asked  my  father  to  apply  to  the  government  to 
appoint  me  as  his  assistant  teacher,  instead  of  a 
stranger,  who  then  held  that  place.  My  father  did 
so,  and  thus  I  returned  once  more  under  the  parental 
roof. 


96 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OB, 


CHAPTER  VI. 

EABLY  MANHOOD.     FIRST  PERIOD. 

A  considerable  change  was  produced  in  my  mental 
condition  by  this  change  of  residence  and  of  outward 
circumstances.  First  the  renewal  of  the  most  inti- 
mate connection  with  parents  and  brothers  and  sisters 
could  not  fail  to  have  a  beneficial  influence  on  my 
mind.  It  is  true,  our  family  ties  had  never  been 
broken  ;  but  for  the  last  four  years  I  had  not  been 
able  to  visit  my  parents  oftener  than  every  six,  twelve 
or  eighteen  months,  and  thus  our  intercourse  had 
mostly  been  limited  to  written  communications. 

The  possibility  of  corresponding  with  relations  and 
friends  is  perhaps  sufficient  for  a  satisfactory  intellect- 
ual relation  between  mind  and  mind,  but  not  for  a 
satisfactory  intimate  relation  between  heart  and  heart. 
The  direct  heartfelt  influence  of  a  loving  spirit  is  not 
apt  to  be  transmitted  by  writing ;  it  needs,  as  an 
adequate  sphere,  the  multiplicity,  the  convenience, 
the  trivialities  and  conventionalities  of  common  inter- 
course and  every-day  life.  In  accordance  with  this 
remark,  my  stay  at  home  had  the  tendency  to  influence 
me  in  a  salutary  way,  bringing  my  troubled  soul  * 
nearer  to  a  desirable  state  of  tranquillity  and  serenity. 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY. 


97 


Secondly,  my  mind  derived  great  advantage  from 
the  circumstance,  that  I  had  an  immense  amount  of 
labor  to  perform.  Early  in  the  morning  I  instructed 
a  younger  brother  of  mine,  whom  my  father,  on  my 
return  home,  had  taken  away  from  the  burgher-school 
of  the  neighboring  city.  During  the  day,  I  acted  as 
my  father's  assistant,  and  taught  for  six  (during  the 
Summer  for  seven)  hours,  about  one  half  of  his  one 
hundred  and  seventy  scholars.  And  teaching  in  a 
public  school  in  Germany  is  a  very,  very  laborious  work, 
because  the  prevailing  method  there  requires  so  much 
oral  instruction  and  direct  exertion  of  the  teacher. 
In  the  evening  I  gave  instruction  to  some  private 
scholars  in  several  higher  branches  which  needed  much 
preparation  on  my  part. 

Besides  I  was  induced  to  open  a  gymnasium  during 
a  part  of  the  year.  The  exercises  and  duties  devolv- 
ing upon  me  through  this  institution  made  a  consider- 
able demand  on  my  time,  though  on  the  other  hand  I 
acknowledge  that  I  owe  to  gymnastics,  at  this,  and  at 
other  times,  the  preservation  of  a  sufficient  degree  of 
health,  perhaps  of  life  itself. 

Furthermore,  I  wrote  some  very  elaborate  essays 
which  I  delivered  to  the  minister  of  the  parish,  in 
accordance  with  the  regulation  I  have  spoken  of  on  a 
former  occasion.  Now  and  then  I  also  wrote  some 
articles  for  periodicals  and  newspapers,  and  tried,  in 


98 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


addition,  by  reading  to  remain  familiar  with  the  pro- 
gressive literature  of  my  profession. 

This  vast  amount  of  labor,  however,  did  not  entirely 
absorb  all  my  time.  I  could  always  eke  out  some 
leisure  hours.  But  as  I  was  inclined,  induced  and 
obliged  to  spend  these  hours  in  society,  I  was  not 
tempted  to  indulge  in  private  and  silent  meditations, 
and  I  must,  therefore,  adduce  sociability  as  a  third 
cause  for  my  being  led  into  other  channels  of  thought 
and  feeling.  I  will  not  decide  whether  the  change 
was  entirely  and  exclusively  for  the  better. 

I  will  give  the  reader  a  picture  of  my  life  at  that 
time,  as  far  as  it  related  to  society.  This  will  be 
partly  applicable  to  German  life  in  general.  And, 
though,  of  course,  allowances  must  be  made  on  all 
sides  for  modulations  according  to  places,  times  and 
individuals,  still  I  think  the  reader  will  be  able  to 
form  a  somewhat  correct  idea  of  the  influences  for  good 
or  bad  which  German  life  would  seem  to  have  on  the 
religion  and  morals  of  individuals. 

My  position  in  the  midst  of  all  the  people  around 
me,  was  extremely  flattering.  Though  I  was  only  21 
years  of  age,  and  though  I  had  been  known  at  home 
all  along,  as  a  boy,  and  as  a  youth,  still  I  had  not  the 
slightest  difficulty  in  taking  my  position  as  a  man, 
and  as  the  equal  of  the  most  prominent  members  of 
the  community.    I  certainly  did  not  find  the  saying 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  99 


verified  "  a  prophet  is  not  without  honor,  save  in  his 
own  country."  My  position,  however,  did  not  involve 
me  in  a  regular  round  and  routine  of  "  calls,"  such  as 
one's  social  position  in  any  New  England  village  inva- 
riably requires.  At  home  I  never  saw  people  go  to 
other  people's  houses,  because  their  social  duties  re- 
quired them  to  do  so.  They  usually  went  either  on 
business,  or  on  invitation.  If  they  did  go  at  any  other 
time,  it  was  in  the  most  unceremonious  way,  without 
thinking  whether  it  was  "  their  turn  v  &c.  They  went 
because  they  felt  like  it,  and  stayed  as  long  as  they 
pleased.  I  had  no  idea  at  that  time  that  I  should  ever 
go  into  a  house Jfor  five  or  ten  minutes  merely  for  the 
sake  of  "  making  a  call." 

My  parents,  the  minister,  the  government's  admin- 
istrator, some  merchants,  a  few  of  the  better  class 
among  the  farmers,  on  the  whole,  the  aristocracy  of  the 
place,  formed  by  mutual  consent  a  circle  of  acquaint- 
ances who  invited  each  other,  especially  in  the  winter 
about  the  time  of  beef  and  hog-killing.  As  there 
were  no  butchers  in  places  like  that  one,  the  latter 
circumstance  was  an  important  item. 

The  company  who  had  been  invited  several  days 
beforehand,  met  at  their  host's  house  about  4  o'clock 
P.  M.,  usually  on  Sundays.  All  the  ladies  and  gentle- 
men were  seated  around  a  large  table  ;  they  conversed 
while  they  enjoyed  a  cup  of  coffee  and  a  variety  of 


100 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


cake.    The  gentlemen  smoked  a  pipe  at  the  same  time. 

About  6  or  7  o'clock  the  gentlemen  were  seated  at 
the  card  table,  after  having  been  out  perhaps  to  admire 
the  horses  and  cattle  belonging  to  the  host,  which  were 
always  kept  in  fine  stables  being  under  the  same  roof 
with  the  dwelling. 

Sometimes  one  or  the  other  of  the  ladies  might  assist 
in  making  up  the  necessary  number  at  a  card  table, 
but  usually  they  conversed  in  the  mean  time,  knitting, 
eating  cakes  and  fruit  and  perhaps  sipping  their  wine, 
while  the  gentlemen  drank  theirs. 

About  ten  o'clock  the  whole  company  sat  down  to  a 
sumptuous  supper,  consisting  of  several  kinds  of  meat 
and  a  variety  of  accompanying  dishes,  and  of  a  suffi- 
cient supply  of  wine.  After  supper  the  company  re- 
tained their  seats,  and  while  engaged  in  the  most  lively 
conversation,  they  took  tea  somewhere  about  midnight, 
and  reached  home,  thereupon,  at  or  sometime  after  one 
o'clock. 

If  the  fare  on  such  occasions  was  rather  sumptuous, 
we  must  not  conclude  from  this  that  the  people  usually 
were  high  livers.  On  the  contrary,  these  occasions  were 
only  welcome  interruptions  in  the  routine  of  a  most 
simple,  frugal  and  economical  domestic  life. 

Most  of  these  families  were  accustomed,  on  week 
days  to  breakfast  on  coffee  and  brown  bread,  to  dine 
on  one  kind  of  vegetables  and  a  very  small  piece  of 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  101 


meat,  and  to  sup  on  boiled  buttermilk.  It  is  certainly 
very  desirable  to  have  the  facility  of  procuring  ample 
and  luxurious  means  of  sustenance  at  any  time,  and 
every  American  ought  to  thank  God  that  there  has 
hardly  been  a  time  when  a  healthy  and  industrious 
man,  within  the  limits  of  this  Union,  could  not  make 
a  little  more  than  a  comfortable  living.  Still,  it  is 
doubtful  whether  it  is  best  always  to  have  so  good 
breakfasts  and  dinners  as  even  the  lower  classes  in  this 
country  enjoy,  or  to  be  frugal  in  the  main,  and  to  in- 
dulge one's  appetite  only  at  longer  or  shorter  intervals. 

Kabelais  says  with  some  truth "  mirthfulness  comes 
from  the  stomach ; "  and  as  dyspepsia,  hypochondria, 
gloominess  and  despondency  are  often  the  consequence 
of  high  living,  but  never  of  frugality,  a  joyous  temper 
has  much  to  do  with  a  person's  morals  and  religion. 
The  customs  and  habits  I  have  mentioned,  as  well  as 
those  I  am  about  to  mention,  may  therefore  not  be  so 
triflmg  and  so  far  out  of  the  range  of  my  present  un- 
dertaking, as  they  might,  at  first  sight,  seem  to  be. 

A  second  and  very  prominent  part  of  our  social 
enjoyments  consisted  in  dancing.  The  landlords  of 
a  few  of  the  hotels  and  inns  in  our  village  and  in  the 
surrounding  places,  arranged  during  the  winter  each 
about  four  subscription  balls,  and  the  landlords  of  the 
remaining  public  houses  received  permission  from  the 
court  each  to  hold  at  least  one  ball  in  the  course  of 


102 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


the  season.  These  balls  were  only  frequented  by  the 
so  called  higher  classes  of  the  community,  and  though 
these  gatherings  were  not  exclusive,  still  they  were 
not  disturbed  by  any  unwelcome  intruders.  In  Ger- 
many every  one  seems,  so  to  say,  to  know  his  station, 
and  the  lower  classes  do  not  have  the  desire  to  mingle 
with  the  higher  classes,  and  to  rival  with  them  in  show, 
expenses,  modes  of  enjoyment  &c.  As  a  usual  thing, 
every  one  goes  where  he  knows  he  finds  his  equals 
and  where  he  is  welcome. 

The  court  allowed  the  landlords  on  other  days, 
(always  on  Sundays)  to  give  the  farmers'  helps  and 
others,  an  occasion  to  dance. 

Most  of  us,  young  and  old,  attended  balls  quite  reg- 
ularly, and  many  a  time  we  marched  for  a  mile  or  two 
across  meadows  and  fields,  through  mud  and  rain, 
through  snow-drifts,  storm  and  darkness,  after  having 
danced  from  8  o'clock  in  the  evening  until  3,  4,  5  or 
6,  in  the  morning. 

During  the  winter,  the  roads  in  our  alluvial  soil  were 
often  impassable,  and  no  one  could  rely  on  horses  for 
locomotion  ;  but  even  at  other  times  the  farmers  them- 
selves and  their  ladies  would  walk  in  preference  to 
riding.  Our  ladies  were  as  healthy  and  robust  a  set 
of  people  as  I  have  ever  seen  anywhere. 

At  a  ball  every  young  man  danced  first  with  his 
mother  and  with  other  elderly  female  relatives  and 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  103 


acquaintances,  and  afterwards  with  his  younger  lady 
friends.  Among  the  latter  it  was  not  really  the 
youngest  ones  that  were  most  desired  as  partners.  Ger- 
man girls  are  not  so  early  developed  as  American  girls, 
and  therefore  not  so  early  attractive  and  not  so  early 
considered  as  equals  in  the  society  of  grown  people. 
On  the  other  hand,  however,  young  ladies  were  not  in 
danger  of  being  counted  so  soon  among  "  old  maids." 
Thus,  I  think  the  age  between  20  and  25  years  was 
the  culminating  period  of  a  lady's  attractiveness  at 
balls  and  other  such  places. 

The  fondness  for  dancing  which  we  find  to  be  preva- 
lent among  the  Germans,  has  several  causes,  one  of 
which  I  will  mention.  Dancing  is  a  necessary  institu- 
tion to  produce  and  facilitate  sociability  between  unmar- 
ried people.  In  Germany  a  married  lady  is  neither 
under  too  little,  nor  too  much  restraint.  The  wedding 
is  for  her  not  the  event  which  closes  the  time  "  when 
she  could  enjoy  herself."  On  the  contrary,  she  can 
now  participate  in  all  that  is  going  on  around  her,  and 
married  and  unmarried  men  pay  her  now  more  atten- 
tion and  homage  than  before.  An  unmarried  lady 
who  is  engaged,  is  also  well  provided  for.  As  soon  as 
her  betrothal  is  made  public  (and  this  is  done  forthwith 
by  sending  cards,  merely  containing  the  two  names,  to 
all  her  friends,)  and  as  soon  as  she  and  her  intended 
have  made  the  customary  round  of  visits  to  their 


104 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


friends,  they  can  go  together  to  any  place  of  amuse- 
ment :  on  the  whole,  their  social  intercourse  is  unre- 
strained. 

But  as  for  the  rest,  unmarried  ladies  in  the  hotter 
classes  of  society  are  under  great  restraint.  They  do 
not  receive  calls  from  young  men  all  to  themselves ; 
they  are  not  invited  and  would  not  dare  to  accept  an 
invitation  from  a  young  man  to  go  with  him  alone  to 
a  concert,  a  hall  &c. ;  at  a  party  they  have  to  he  mod- 
est, quiet,  retiring  ;  on  going  home,  no  one  of  them 
is  ashed  by  a  young  man  whether  "  he  shall  have  the 
pleasure  to  see  her  home."  No,  on  all  occasions  the 
mothers  and  aunts  take  care  of  the  young  ladies,  or 
send  a  faithful  and  trusty  maid  servant  after  them. 

Under  such  circumstances,  dancing  is  often  the  only 
occasion  where  the  young  people  can  throw  off  their 
reserve,  and  where  they  can  fully  enjoy  each  other's 
society.  No  wonder,  then,  that  they  should  often  pro- 
long their  halls  almost  until  the  dawn  of  day. 

No  wonder  that  an  occasion  for  dancing  was  welcome 
at  any  time.  The  halls  I  have  spoken  of,  were  all  held 
during  the  winter  ;  but  the  summer  also  brought  many 
occasions  for  dancing — at  fairs,  target-shootings  &c. 

Even  at  the  present  time,  with  very  different  views 
of  life,  I  cannot  say  that  T  look  back  with  sorrow  upon 
the  many  precious  hours  I  have  seemingly  wasted  in 
dancing.    Those  occasions  might  induce  many  a  young 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  105 


man  to  indulge  during  the  pauses  too  freely  in  drink- 
ing and  smoking.  And  though,  on  many  occasions,  I 
may  have  entered  the  schoolroom  on  such  mornings 
after  a  hall,  wearied  in  body,  yet  I  recollect  I  felt 
enlivened  and  refreshed  in  soul  and  spirit,  and  was, 
therefore,  working  to  greater  advantage  than  at  other 
times.  The  dancing  itself  and  the  intercourse  with 
the  other  sex  which  it  brought  about,  will  ever  be 
remembered  by  me  as  a  pure,  innocent  and  desirable 
social  enjoyment,  and  though  I  know  that  it  is  liable 
to  be  abused  as  well  as  every  other  good  thing,  I  should 
not  like  to  condemn  it  in  toto,  as  a  snare  of  the  devil. 

Another  source  of  enjoyment  I  found  in  a  glee-club 
which  I  formed  soon  after  my  return  home,  on  the  plan 
of  those,  of  which  I  had  been  a  member  in  larger 
places. 

If  Americans  believe  that  the  Germans  are  particu- 
larly a  Musical  Nation,  they  are  mistaken  as  far  as 
the  North  Western  part  of  Germany  is  concerned. 
There  I  should  much  sooner,  even  in  this  century, 
renew  the  complaint  of  Bonifacius  who  compared  the 
singing  of  the  ancient  Germans  to  the  rumbling  of  a 
wagon  over  a  road  made  of  logs.  It  is  true,  almost 
every  boy  and  every  girl  of  the  higher  classes  learned 
music  as  a  part  of  a  complete  education,  but  as  to  the 
lower  classes  in  the  cities  and  the  country  people  on 
the  whole,  there  was  very  little  music  among  them. 


106 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


My  father  had  a  harpsichord,  but  that  was  the  only 
instrument  of  that  kind  in  the  village  and  neighbor- 
hood, and  only  here  and  there  a  single  flute,  or  violin 
might  be  found.  There  was  not  much  singing  to  be 
heard,  and  that  which  might  be  heard,  was  not  of  the 
best  description  and  not  occasioned  by  the  best  motives. 

It  is  true,  in  all  my  experience  with  hundreds  of 
scholars,  I  met  very  seldom  a  child  that  could  not 
sing  a  note,  but  such  an  entire  absence  of  latent  musi- 
cal talent  is  also  very  rare  among  people  of  other 
nations. 

The  glee-club,  which  I  organized,  was  the  first  one 
formed  in  a  village,  in  that  region.  With  persons, 
many  of  whom  did  not  know  the  notes,  I  had  a  very  hard 
time  of  it,  and  was  obliged  to  use  the  violin  to  guide 
one  part,  and  to  help  with  my  voice  in  either  of  the 
other  parts.  But  it  was  a  labor  of  love,  and  therefore, 
it  did  not  seem  hard  to  me.  By  weekly  exercises,  I 
succeeded  so  far  that  we  could  celebrate  our  first  anni- 
versary publicly  and  to  every  body's  satisfaction,  and 
I  had  the  pleasure  to  see  that  within  a  short  time  the 
inhabitants  of  eight  neighboring  villages  followed  our 
example,  and  that  glee-clubs  became  one  of  the  ele- 
ments of  social  enjoyment  in  that  region. 

On  days  and  evenings  when  I  was  not  induced  to 
dedicate  my  leisure  hours  to  any  of  the  subjects  I  have 
mentioned  so  far,  I  went  to  a  club  which  was  held  every 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  107 


evening  alternately  in  the  two  principal  hotels  (or 
rather  inns)  of  the  place. 

During  the  winter,  the  time  was  spent  in  playing 
cards.  The  minister,  and  a  few  other  dignitaries  of 
the  village,  were  the  most  regular  attendants.  A  min- 
ister was  the  person  that  induced  me,  when  I  was  ahout 
16  years  old,  for  the  first  time  to  play  cards  at  a  pub- 
lic house.  We  always  played  for  money,  though  not 
at  a  very  high  rate.  It  was  very  rare  that  one  lost, 
or  gained  more  than  half  a  dollar  during  an  evening. 
In  summer,  the  cards  rested  for  the  most  part,  and  the 
evenings  were  spent  in  playing  nine-pins.  This  game 
was  by  itself  a  very  healthy  exercise,  but  it  was  some- 
times rather  too  exciting,  since  it  was  played  for 
money,  and  always  by  two  antagonistic  parties  who,  of 
course,  watched  every  throw  of  their  partners  as  well 
as  of  their  opponents,  especially  the  last  decisive 
throws  of  every  round. 

From  the  whole  preceding  account  it  will  be  evident 
that  I  had  not  a  minute  left  to  spend  on  independent 
philosophical,  abstract,  or  religious  meditations,  and 
I  have  now  only  to  show  whether  religion  did  not  enter 
into  public  life,  or  into  my  private  life,  in  such  a  way 
as  to  have  at  least  now  and  then  some  influence  on  my 
mind.  To  this  end  I  will  give  a  brief  account  of  the 
general  state  of  affairs  concerning  religious  matters. 

To  conclude  from  the  footprints  past  times  have  left 


108 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


in  that  region,  one  would  think  that  its  inhabitants, 
several  centuries  ago,  were  a  very  religious  people. 
There  is  one  custom,  which  I  think,  is  very  beautiful, 
and  though  it  may  be,  for  the  most  part,  thoughtlessly 
complied  with,  still  I  cannot  help  believing  that  it  had 
its  origin  in  a  truly  religious  spirit.  When  a  person 
passes  by  a  garden,  a  field  &c.  where  one,  or  several  per- 
sons are  at  work,  he  says  "  Good  day,  God  help,"  and 
the  individuals  spoken  to  reply  "  Good  day,  I  thank !" 

The  churches  there  are  numerous,  and  very  few  of 
them  were  built  during  the  last  two  centuries.  The 
parishes  contain  only  from  300  to  1800  inhabitants, 
and  thus  one  meets  on  travelling  through  the  country, 
a  "  church  village  "  every  two  or  three  miles.  Most 
of  the  churches  are  very  spacious,  and  are  built  of 
large  granite  blocks  which  are  not  found  in  the  neigh- 
borhood, and  must  have  been  brought  from  afar,  at 
great  expense. 

The  belfry  is  usually  built  near  the  church,  and  the 
latter  is  not  adorned  with  a  steeple.  In  the  belfry 
there  are  generally  three  bells,  and  these  are  rung 
on  all  possible  occasions,  singly,  or  together  in  differ- 
ent combinations.  It  required  seven  persons  to  ring 
the  bells  which  were  under  the  charge  of  my  father 
(as  teacher,  organist  and  church  warden),  4  persons 
for  one,  2  for  the  other,  and  1  for  the  third.  I  re- 
member with  delight  how  beautiful  it  seemed  to  me 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  109 


on  a  calm  Sunday  morning  to  hear  the  bells  of  5  or 
6  neighboring  villages,  sending  their  sweet  and  solemn 
harmonies  through  the  reposing  atmosphere. 

Almost  all  the  churches  are  richly  endowed  with 
real  estate,  which  was  given  them  by  the  builders,  or 
in  subsequent  times,  (though  not  of  late)  by  parish- 
ioners as  a  legacy.  There  were  churches  that  could 
be  supported  without  any  taxes  being  levied  for  such 
a  purpose. 

I  do  not  know  whether  building  churches  and  going 
to  church  were  then  an  index  of  the  moral  and  re- 
ligious state  of  communities  and  individuals,  with 
any  greater  or  inferior  accuracy  than  now.  However, 
so  much  is  known,  that  in  feudal  times,  the  "  Younk- 
ers  "  (a  princely  aristocracy  of  our  region)  used  the 
churches  as  fortresses,  when  they,  in  their  petty  war- 
fare, were  urged  too  closely  by  their  adversaries. 
Many  churches  were  perhaps  built  with  this  end  in 
view,  or,  at  least,  with  an  eye  to  such  an  emergency  ; 
the  thick  walls,  the  small  and  elevated  windows  &c. 
prove  this. 

Moreover,  the  churches  which  were  built  on  small 
hills,  were  places  of  refuge  when  the  North  Sea  broke 
through  the  then  very  imperfect  dykes,  and  inundated 
the  whole  level  region.  As  late  as  1825  there  was 
such  an  inundation.  As  I  was  then  4  years  old,  I 
have  a  slight  recollection  of  seeing  the  water  around 


110 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


our  house,  of  our  having  the  furniture  carried  into 
the  church  and  our  cattle  driven  upon  the  grave-yard 
which  surrounded  the  church.  And  we  ourselves 
went  to  the  minister's  house  which  was  situated  higher 
than  ours.  When  the  water  subsided,  and  the  roads 
became  passable,  a  number  of  drowned  persons  were 
brought  to  the  grave-yard. 

Not  far  from  us  there  was  a  bay  which  had  been 
formed  several  centuries  ago  during  such  an  inundation 
which  had  swept  away  seven  parishes.  1  visited  this 
bay  several  times.  During  ebb-tide  one  could  go  out 
a  distance  beyond  the  dyke  to  a  small  hill  which  still 
showed  the  foundation  of  one  of  the  churches  that 
were  destroyed.  As  I  spoke  of  not  knowing  whether 
there  was  really  more  religion  in  old  times  than  now, 
I  will  notice  one  tradition  connected  with  the  event,  I 
have  just  recalled.  It  is  related  that  those  7  parishes 
were  swept  away,  because  their  inhabitants  were  so 
wicked.  Among  others  things,  it  is  said,  for  instance, 
that  a  farmer  sent  for  a  clergyman  to  administer  the 
rite  of  "  communion  "  to  his  dying  wife ;  but  the 
minister  on  his  arrival  found  on  the  supposed  death- 
bed, a — pig,  instead  of  a  woman. 

The  inhabitants  of  my  native  province,  while  I 
lived  among  them,  did  not  thus  boldly  defy  and  mock 
religion  and  its  ministers,  but  on  the  other  hand  they 
envinced  very  little  interest  in  them,  and  had  on  the 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  Ill 


whole  very  little  to  do  with  them.  There  was  always 
a  sufficient  number  of  young  men  who  acquired  at 
college  a  thorough  education,  and  who  went  thereupon 
to  a  university  there  to  study  theology.  After  their 
return  home,  they  were  examined  by  the  consistory 
(the  state's  church  government),  and  if  they  passed 
this  examination,  they  were  allowed  to  preach  occa- 
sionally. According  to  the  evidence  of  scholarship 
they  had  given  in  this  first  examination,  they  could 
apply  for  a  second  examination;  the  best  of  them 
after  one,  the  others  after  two,  or  three  years.  Having 
passed  this  second  ordeal,  they  were  allowed  not  only 
to  preach,  but  also  to  administer  the  sacraments.  But 
they  had  to  bide  their  time  to  become  settled  ministers. 

When  a  minister  died,  or  if  a  parish  needed,  for 
some  other  reason,  a  minister,  the  government  selected 
a  person  to  fill  this  vacancy.  If  the  place  was  one 
richly  endowed,  the  government  chose  from  out  of  the 
ministers  who  were  not  quite  so  well  paid,  that  one 
who  had  been  the  greatest  number  of  years  in  his 
actual  situation.  The  place  then  vacated  was  again 
filled  on  the  same  principle,  and  so  on,  until  a  place 
for  a  beginner  was  opened,  and  there  the  government 
sent  the  oldest  of  the  unemployed  candidates  of 
divinity.  It  was  a  rarity,  if  any  minister,  or  candi- 
date was  preferred  and  advanced  on  any  other  ground 
than  age  and  length  of  service. 


112 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


It  is  true,  the  ministers  lived  principally  on  the 
income  of  the  landed  estate  with  which  their  places 
had  been  endowed  in  old  times,  and  on  fees,  which  had 
to  be  paid  for  every  funeral,  marriage  and  baptism, 
and  on  produce,  (grain,  bread,  cheese,  milk,  meat  &c.) 
which  the  farmers  were  obliged  to  contribute  every 
year  (as  a  kind  of  tithe  I  suppose.)  Thus  the  largest 
salaries  of  the  ministers  were  not  made  up  by  the 
heaviest  direct  taxes.  Still  it  was  hard  for  the  parishes 
with  the  richest  churches  and  parsonages,  in  conse- 
quence of  the  above-mentioned  arrangement  always 
to  have  the  oldest  and  most  inefficient  ministers,  and 
thus  to  derive  very  unwelcome  fruits  from  their  parish 
treasures. 

The  oldest  ministers  were  the  most  inefficient,  not 
only  on  account  of  their  age.  A  young  man  who 
had  recently  and  freshly  come  from  his  books  and 
from  other  sources  of  learning,  might  hold  out  for  a 
few  years  and  show  some  scientific  zeal,  though  he 
might  not  have  the  remotest  idea  that  religious  zeal 
was  the  kind  of  enthusiasm  he  and  others  ought  to 
wish  to  find  in  him.  But  even  that  scientific  zeal 
could  not  fail  to  vanish  very  soon.  What  was  there 
to  keep  his  zeal  alive,  or  to  infuse  any  into  him,  if 
there  wa3  none  ?  The  people  had  not  wished,  or 
bidden  him  to  come ;  perhaps  they  had  never  seen  him, 
or  heard  of  him  before  his  installation.    They  took 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  113 


him  because  they  could  not  help  it,  or  because  they 
thought  it  was  none  of  their  business  to  have  any 
opinion  about  the  matter.  Why  should  he  try  to  do 
anything  particularly  for  his  parishioners  ?  He  had 
not  come  among  them,  because  he  liked  them,  or 
because  he  thought  he  had  a  mission  from  God,  for 
the  welfare  of  immortal  souls. 

To  be  a  minister  was  the  way  he  had  chosen  for  the 
sake  of  getting  through  this  life.  There  was  a  parish  ; 
he  was  sent  to  be  its  minister  until  he  should  get  a 
better  situation.  And  then,  why  should  he  even  strive 
to  deserve  and  soon  to  reach  a  better  situation,  by 
good  behavior,  good  preaching  &c.  ?  He  knew  he 
would  be  promoted,  anyhow,  in  his  turn. 

The  consequence  was  this.  The  ministers  preached 
once  every  Sunday,  and  on  every  Christian  festival 
(Christmas  &c.)  because  this  was  a  business  imposed 
upon  them  by  the  church  laws.  They  had  received  a 
good  education,  and  their  sermons,  therefore,  could 
not  be  all  poor  ;  still,  on  the  whole,  I  think  the  preach- 
ing was  not  effective,  because  it  was  a  mere  matter  of 
routine,  a  sounding  brass. 

The  ministers  performed  the  baptismal  and  mar- 
riage rites,  and  officiated  at  funerals  if  they  were 
particularly  called  upon  and  paid.  They  kept  the 
parish  registers  of  these  events,  and  they  acted  as 
superintendents  of  the  parish  schools,  and  as  chairmen 
8 


114  THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 

of  the  boards  of  overseers  of  the  poor.  Very  few  of 
them  had  any  idea  of  ever  paying*  pastoral  visits. 
They  went  where  they  were  invited,  to  such  feasts  as  I 
have  described  above.  And  the  minister  of  whom  I 
have  spoken  as  my  companion  in  playing  cards  and 
nine-pins,  dancing  and  drinking  at  balls  &c.,  was  no 
exception.    Most  other  ministers  did  the  same. 

The  people  looked  upon  such  worldliness  either 
with  indifference,  or  with  approbation.  Their  indif- 
ference, or  submissiveness,  or  want  of  feeling  (or 
whatever  one  may  call  it)  went  even  so  far,  that  I 
know  of  instances  where  they  were  satisfied  with 
keeping  for  many  years,  a  minister  among  them,  who 
was  known  to  have  committed  flagrant  crimes.  It 
was  a  thing  hardly  ever  heard  of,  that  a  minister 
should  be  removed  on  the  wish  of  his  parishioners. 
What  did  they  care,  who  was  their  minister  ?  If  he 
let  them  alone,  and  if  he  was  a  man  they  could  toler- 
ably well  get  along  with,  he  might  stay  if  he  liked, 
take  it  easy  and  preach  to  empty  pews  if  this  pleased 
him,  or  sometimes  not  at  all,  if  he  liked  that  better. 

I  was  once  told  of  a  minister  in  a  small  parish  who 
went  for  a  month  to  the  church  always  with  the  same 
sermon  in  his  pocket  without  finding  an  audience 
before  which  to  deliver  it.  The  parish  in  which  my 
father  was  organist,  consisted  of  about  1800  persons, 
and  the  usual  attendance  at  church  on  common  Sun- 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY. 


115 


days  ranged  between  30  and  50  individuals.  Later  I 
played  the  organ  in  a  town  of  4  or  5000  inhabitants 
with  only  one  church.  There  were  morning  and 
afternoon  services.  In  the  former,  I  counted  usually 
about  50  persons  present,  in  the  latter  about  6  or  10. 

Under  such  circumstances,  ministers  could  hardly  be 
expected  to  be  zealous  in  their  calling,  for  as  I  have 
intimated,  there  was  nothing  that  would  be  likely 
inwardly  to  develop  religious  sentiments  in  their  souls 
individually  ;  there  was  nothing  in  their  surroundings 
that  could  act  as  a  stimulus  outwardly  ;  the  govern- 
ment even  provided  her  foster  children  only  with  plenty 
of  food  and  raiment,  but  did  hardly  anything  to  develop 
their  spiritual  life  and  influence.  All  it  did,  consisted 
in  sending  every  two,  three,  or  four  years  a  committee 
successively  into  all  the  parishes.  It  was  composed  of 
the  general  superintendent,  (somewhat  like  a  bishop) 
and  a  civil  officer  or  magistrate.  The  former  was  to 
look  into  the  spiritual  concerns  of  the  churches  and 
schools,  and  the  latter  into  the  management  of  their 
temporal  affairs.  Accordingly  one  day  was  appointed 
for  "  school  visitation "  and  another  for  church 
visitation. 

The  latter  was  hardly  more  than  a  mere  form.  The 
minister  had  to  preach  and  to  catechize  in  the  presence 
of  the  superintendent.  The  principal  event  of  the 
day  was  a  grand  dinner  which  the  minister  gave  to  his 


116 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


guests  and  to  the  dignitaries  of  the  parish,  and  for 
which  he  was  reimbursed  from  the  church  funds.  The 
people,  therefore,  liked  to  call  these  stated  visitations, 
Kwclicn  (kitchen)  visitations  instead  of  Kirchen 
(church)  visitations. 

Thus  religion  entered  into  public  life  and  into  the 
life  of  individuals  for  the  most  part  only  so  far  as  the 
laws  of  the  state  made  it  obligatory.  The  few  even 
who  voluntarily  engaged  in  some  act  of  public  wor- 
ship, seemed  hardly  to  be  animated  by  any  spiritual 
or  religious  thought  or  feeling.  And  private  worship 
there  was  none,  for  neither  single  households  were  in 
the  habit  of  keeping  family  worship,  nor  did  friends 
or  neighbors  meet  for  any  such  purpose.  If  they  had 
done  the  latter,  the  police,  probably,  would  have  dis- 
turbed their  meetings.  This  happened,  at  least,  a  few 
years  after  the  time  I  have  been  speaking  of,  when 
the  Methodists  began  to  send  emissaries  into  that  part 
of  the  country. 

Considering  these  circumstances  I  cannot  find  it 
strange  that  religion,  at  that  time,  should  have  entered 
into  my  life,  merely  as  a  matter  of  business.  More- 
over, since  my  father  was  so  sickly  that  he  was  entirely 
confined  to  the  house  during  the  greater  part  of  the 
year,  I  had  to  perform  that  part  of  his  duties  (or  his 
business)  which  related  to  the  religious  institutions  of 
the  community.    This  caused  me  still  more  decidedly 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY. 


117 


to  have  no  spiritual  concern  in  religious  matters. 

On  Sunday  mornings,  I  went  to  church  to  play  the 
organ  which  I  liked  very  much  and  which  was  really 
now  and  then  edifying  to  me,  viz.  if  on  a  festive  occa- 
sion there  was  a  larger  congregation  than  usual,  so 
that  their  singing  would  rise  majestically  and  sol- 
emnly above  the  sounds  of  the  organ.  Congregational 
singing,  or  a  large  choir  is  necessary  to  bring  out  the 
character  and  effect  of  a  simple  hymn  ;  the  singing  of 
a  small  choir  and  especially  of  a  quartett  is  a  lament- 
able innovation  as  to  this  kind  of  music.  I  was, 
therefore,  glad  that  there  was  hardly  anywhere  a  choir 
in  the  churches  of  my  native  country.  The  singing, 
however,  was  spoiled  by  another  thing ;  it  was  too 
slow,  and  the  organist,  moreover,  had  to  play  a  short 
interlude,  not  only  between  every  two  stanzas  but  even 
between  every  two  lines  ;  a  means  of  badly  mangling* 
and  destroying  the  thoughts  and  feelings  of  almost 
every  sentence. 

The  other  parts  of  the  services  I  hardly  noticed. 
The  minister  read  his  prayers  from  a  book  containing 
a  collection  of  formulas,  probably  published  by  the 
government ;  but  about  their  style  and  contents  I  rec- 
ollect nothing.  The  sermons  were  not  calculated  to 
arrest  my  attention,  or  that  of  any  other  person. 

After  the  sermon,  the  minister  catechized  the  older 
scholars  of  the  parish  school  collected  in  the  aisle,  but 


lis 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


all  the  younger  teachers  of  that  time,  who  had  "been 
educated  in  the  teacher's  Seminary,  believed  to  under- 
stand "  that  business  "  much  better  than  the  ministers, 
i 

and  looked  with  compassion  upon  their  crude  and 
unskilful  mode  of  teaching.  If  there  was  a  baptism 
to  be  performed  after  the  services,  I  had  to  send  warm 
water  to  the  font,  for  which  service  my  father  received 
4  cts,  while  the  minister  made  8  cts  by  the  perform- 
ance itself.  Both  of  us  were  usually  as  expeditious 
as  possible  in  performing  all  these  duties,  and  as  soon 
as  the  door  of  the  church  was  locked,  I  should  almost 
say,  religion  was  laid  aside  for  the  remainder  of  the 
day,  and  if  possible  for  the  remainder  of  the  week. 

Daring  the  week,  however,  we  were  sometimes  sum- 
moned to  attend  a  marriage;  the  minister  in  his  offi- 
cial capacity,  since  civil  marriage  was  not  allowed ;  I, 
.  usually  as  a  guest,  except  on  particularly  splendid 
occasions,  where  I  was  required  to  take  about  a  dozen 
of  school-boys  with  me  to  sing  before  and  after  the 
wedding  ceremony.  The  latter,  however,  was  always 
the  most  unimportant  part  of  the  whole  celebration. 
Sometimes  the  dancing  began  soon  after  the  religious 
act  and  lasted  often  until  the  next  morning.  The 
father  of  the  bride,  or  the  minister  used  to  open  the 
ball  with  the  bride.  The  wedding  sometimes  lasted 
three  days,  though  of  late  not  so  often  as  in  old  times. 

The  way  in   which  the  minister  and  I  and  the 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  119 


church-bells  were  concerned  in  funerals,  depended  upon 
the*  money  that  was  paid.  I  forget  what  fees  the  min- 
ister received.  My  father  was  paid  30  cts  for  the  funer- 
al of  a  child  (the  hells  ringing  a  quarter  of  an  hour)  ; 
GO  cts  for  the  funeral  of  a  grown  person  in  the  evening, 
unattended  by  the  minister  and  organist,  (the  hells 
ringing  an  hour  at  noon)  ;  72  cts  for  a  funeral  in  the 
afternoon.  On  the  latter  occasions  the  hells  rang 
during  the  burial,  as  well  as  the  day  before  at  noon, 
one  hour.  I  had  to  meet  the  funeral  procession  at  the 
gate  of  the  church-yard.  The  minister  and  I  went  in 
front  of  it  with  a  dozen  or  two  of  boys,  singing  while 
we  slowly  walked  round  the  cemetery  and  into  the 
church.  Here  the  bier  was  placed  in  the  aisle  ;  some 
hymns  were  sung ;  the  minister  preached  a  funeral 
sermon,  and  read  a  short  sketch  of  the  life  of  the 
deceased  which  had  been  written  by  the  organist. 
Then  the  procession  was  formed  again  and  proceeded 
to  the  grave  where  the  coffin  was  deposited  while  a 
hymn  was  sung. 

Now  and  then  there  was  a  funeral  with  some 
additional  solemnities  on  which  occasion  the  organist 
received  $5,00.  The  minister  and  I  and  the  singers 
must  then  go  to  the  house  of  mourning.  There 
the  former  and  I  were  placed  in  the  seats  of  honor 
among  the  numerous  guests.  We  and  all  the  other 
men  smoked  out  of  long,  white,  earthen  pipes,  drank 


120 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


coffee,  and  partook  afterwards  of  a  frugal  repast  of 
bread,  cheese  and  small-beer.  Then  after  the  funeral 
sermon  had  been  preached  over  the  corpse,  I  and  the 
boys  were  seated  on  the  vehicle  which  opened  the  train, 
and  before  every  house  we  passed  on  the  road,  we  must 
sing  a  stanza  of  a  hymn. 

The  coffin  was  placed  on  a  second  vehicle,  and  this 
was  followed  by  other  carriages,  containing  the  mourn- 
ing friends  and  guests.  At  the  church,  the  same  rites 
were  performed  which  I  have  described  above,  but  in 
addition  the  organ  was  played,  and  the  church  (as  it 
was  now  evening)  was  illumined  by  a  great  many  can- 
dles. At  the  grave,  one  boy  who  was  usually  chosen 
on  account  of  being  the  best  singer,  had  to  stand  very 
near  the  grave  and  to  sing  a  solo  alternating  with  the 
chorus  of  the  others,  and  representing  the  departed 
spirit. 

I  have  thus  given  a  description  of  the  mode  in  which 
religion  was  connected  with  public  life,  and  as  it 
appeared  on  the  surface  in  the  life  of  individuals.  And 
I  have  very  little  reason  to  believe  that  there  was  much 
internal  and  invisible  religious  life.  It  is  true,  a  per- 
son may  make  very  little  show  of  religion  and  may 
still  have  built  an  altar  in  his  heart.  Thus  I  remem- 
ber that  my  mother  who  made  no  pretensions  to 
appearing  as  a  religious  person,  once  said  to  me  :  "  she 
had  prayed  many  a  time  that  I  might  become  a  good 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  121 

man,  and  hoped  her  prayer  might  be  granted."  This 
one  word  was  to  me  a  greater  proof  of  her  inward  reli- 
gious life,  than  many  so  called  religious  acts  would 
have  been. 

Of  myself,  I  also  must  say  that  I  was  not  entirely 
lost  to  religious  thoughts,  feelings  and  conversation. 

I  remember,  I  came  home  one  evening  from  the  club 
later  than  usual.  My  mother  who  had  been  waiting 
and  watching  for  me,  expressed  her  fear  that  I  had 
been  dissipated.  I  told  her  "  quite  the  contrary."  I 
had  forgotten  the  time  over  a  conversation  with  a 
friend  who  had  said  among  other  things,  "  if  there 
was  no  God,  the  government  ought  to  make  one,"  and 
I  had  tried  to  strengthen  him  in  the  belief  in  the 
existence  of  God. 

From  this  incident,  it  appears  that  I  was  not  an 
atheist,  or  an  infidel.  Still  I  think  I  could  not  have 
called  myself  a  religious  man.  I  say  this  not  on 
account  of  my  not  believing  in  all  the  doctrines  of  the 
Catholic,  the  Lutheran,  or  the  Calvinistic  church,  but 
because  I  think  religion  was  not  the  only,  or  even  prin- 
cipal motive  of  my  actions.  I  did  a  vast  deal  of 
labor,  and  I  hope  I  did  a  great  deal  of  good  and  but 
little  harm.  I  say,  but  little  harm,  because  I  think 
that  teachers  and  physicians  ought  not  to  be  too  sure 
of  doing  no  harm.  A  person  belonging  to  either  of 
these  professions,  may  he  be  ever  so  skilful  and  con- 


122 


THE  PKOBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


scientious,  is  apt  sometimes  to  make  a  mistake  in  the 
treatment  of  those  he  practises  on.  Still  this  fact  need 
not  discourage  him  ;  he  is  allowed  to  continue  his  pro- 
fession, if  he  knows  he  is  as  fit  for  it  as  most  other 
people  would  be  in  his  stead. 

Whatever  good  I  did,  was,  however,  not  the  embod- 
iment of  a  really  religious  feeling.  A  part  of  my 
labors  I  performed  merely  because  it  was  my  business ; 
a  part  because  I  earned  advantages  and  honor  from  it, 
and  a  part  because  I  liked  to  do  it.  As  to  that  part  of 
my  time  which  I  spent  in  society,  I  cannot  look  back 
upon  it  with  remorse,  taking  it  on  the  whole.  Over 
those  enjoyments  I  did  not  neglect  my  duties,  since  I 
was  no  idler,  but  bore  at  least  the  average  share  of 
the  work  mankind  has  to  perform.  I  withheld  from 
nobody  what  was  due  to  him  ;  1  earned  enough  to  have 
ample  means  to  meet  all  my  expenses.  I  did  not  set 
a  bad  example,  because  the  national  conscience,  so  to 
say,  did  not  condemn  our  mode  of  enjoying  ourselves. 
Thus  on  the  one  hand  I  must  say,  that  considering  the 
circumstances,  my  life  at  that  time  was  not  a  worthless 
one,  though  on  the  other  hand,  I  should  not  allow  my- 
self now  to  live  it  over  again  exactly  in  the  same  way. 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  123 


CHAPTER  VII. 

EARLY  MANHOOD.     SECOND  PERIOD. 

How  long  I  should  have  wished  to  remain  in  the 
position  I  have  described,  I  do  not  know.  I  was  called 
away  from  it,  when  I  had  as  yet  no  desire  to  leave  it. 
The  college  in  the  neighboring  town  had  lost  its  teacher 
of  gymnastics  who  had  received  a  call  to  the  capital 
of  the  state.  It  was  hard  to  find  a  successor  to  fill  his 
place,  as  teachers  of  gymnastics  were  rare  at  that  time. 
The  director  of  the  college,  my  former  teacher  there, 
had  heard  of  my  being  engaged  in  teaching  this  branch 
of  education,  and  desired  to  procure  my  services.  He 
could  not  offer  me  a  sufficient  salary,  but  there  hap- 
pened to  be  a  vacancy,  at  the  girls'  school  of  the  city. 
He  mentioned,  therefore,  to  the  superintendent  of  the 
schools  the  expediency  of  inducing  the  government  to 
appoint  me  as  teacher  in  that  school,  so  that  he  at  the 
same  time  might  avail  himself  of  my  services  as 
teacher  of  gymnastics.  His  wish  was  granted,  and 
I  received  the  appointment  quite  unexpectedly. 

My  father  and  I  were  not  pleased  with  it.  Perhaps 
the  government  would  not  have  forced  me  to  accept 
the  situation,  if  I  had  refused  it.  But  my  father  did 
not  like  to  injure  the  feelings  of  the  superintendent. 


124 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


The  latter  was  his  friend ;  he  was  the  minister  who 
had  baptized  me,  had  known  and  liked  me  as  a  child, 
and  had  believed  now  to  confer  a  favor  upon  me. 
Moreover,  my  father  thought  the  city  would  be  a  better 
place  for  me  to  enter  upon  a  successful  career.  I 
accepted,  therefore,  the  offered  situation. 

I  was  connected  with  the  girls'  "  town  school 99  for 
five  years.  I  entered  as  the  youngest  or  the  fifth  in 
the  corps  of  teachers,  but  about  eighteen  months  later 
there  was  another  vacancy,  and  I  was  promoted  to  the 
place  of  the  fourth  teacher,  and  about  two  years  after- 
wards I  was  made  third  teacher.  Our  school  contained 
about  three  hundred  girls.  The  first  class  was  a  select 
school  with  twenty  scholars,  the  second  contained  sixty, 
the  third  eighty,  the  fourth  and  fifth  each  seventy 
pupils.  "We  taught  five  hours  a  day.  Most  of  the 
time  I  was  engaged  in  my  own  class,  but  the  French, 
writing,  drawing  and  (for  some  time)the  singing  lessons 
in  the  two  upper  classes,  were  entrusted  to  me.  In 
consequence  of  this,  I  had  always  a  number  of  private 
pupils  from  the  second  class  who  wished  especially  to 
prepare  themselves  for  entering  the  select  class. 

During  the  day,  I  gave  some  other  private  lessons; 
I  was  appointed  as  writing  master  in  one  of  the  classes 
of  the  college  ;  in  the  evening  I  directed  the  gymnas- 
tic exercises  of  the  seventy  students  of  the  college. 
Besides,  I  taught  gymnastics  to  a  private  class  of  small 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  125 


boys,  and  for  some  time  to  a  class  of  grown  men.  For 
two  summers,  I  walked  once  every  week  over  to  another 
town,  to  teach  gymnastics  there  for  two  hours,  and 
walked  hack  the  six  miles,  the  same  day.  For  several 
years,  I  walked  on  Saturdays  over  to  my  parents'  home, 
to  lead  the  glee-club  there  whose  members  thought 
they  could  not  do  without  me. 

Thus  I  led  again  a  very  active  life,  and  the  affair 
turned  out  much  better  than  I  had  expected.  I  had 
hesitated  to  accept  the  situation  of  fifth  teacher  there, 
partly  on  account  of  the  pitifully  small  salary  connect- 
ed with  it  (eighty  dollars  a  year  and  free  lodging) 
and  still  even  during  the  first  year,  I  made  money 
enough.  And  a  few  years  later,  at  the  age  of  twenty- 
six  years,  I  had  an  income  as  large  as  most  teachers 
obtained  only  at  the  age  of  forty  or  fifty  years,  and 
some,  perhaps,  never  in  their  whole  lives.  My  social 
life  became,  from  year  to  year,  more  satisfactory. 

In  the  higher  classes  of  German  society,  there  exists 
a  prejudice  which  I  might  call  partly  the  effect  of  a 
real  aristocracy  of  learning,  partly  the  remnant  of 
ancient  barriers  of  custom,  rank  and  privileges.  I 
have  no  personal  experience  of  the  pride  and  haughti- 
ness of  a  feudal  aristocracy  of  nobility,  since  my  native 
state  fortunately  had  got  rid  of  this  aristocracy  of  the 
"  shot-pouch,"  as  Carlyle  calls  it.  There  were  some 
noblemen  at  court,  who  had  mostly  come  over  from 


126 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


other  states,  but  they  were  dependent  011  court  favors 
and  salaries,  and  had  no  prerogatives  out  of  their 
proper  sphere. 

We  had,  however,  a  half  real,  half  imaginary  aris- 
tocracy of  learning.  The  government  officers,  minis- 
ters, lawyers  and  physicians  who  had  all  been  obliged 
to  spend  three  or  four  years  at  the  university,  usually 
considered  themselves  superior  to  everybody  who  had 
not  "  studied."  There  may  have  been  a  time  when 
knowledge  and  education  were  found  nowhere  except 
among  the  "  studied  "  classes,  but  that  time  had  passed. 
Especially  had  the  teachers'  Seminaries  for  the  last 
thirty  years  educated  a  class  of  men  who  had  in  some 
respects  a  superior  education,  and  the  burgher  schools 
began  in  opposition  to  colleges  and  universities  to  send 
forth  their  pupils  educated  by  the  means  of  mathe- 
matics and  natural  sciences,  in  preference  to  the  ancient 
languages.  Still,  the  aristocracy  of  learning  were  gen- 
erally not  willing  to  admit  any  persons  thus  educated, 
into  their  society  as  equals.  Some  of  the  wealthier 
merchants  were  admissible  on  account  of  their  money 
and  their  daughters.  Very  few  others  succeeded  in 
gaining  admittance.  I  was,  however,  fortunate  enough 
to  overcome  this  prejudice,  and  was  admitted  on  equal 
terms  into  all  the  circles  of  the  higher  classes  of  society 
in  the  city. 

Nevertheless,  this  circumstance  had  not  the  effect 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY. 


127 


to  separate  me  from  the  primary  teachers,  and  espe- 
cially it  did  not  prevent  me  from  sharing  in  their  gen- 
eral antipathy  against  ministers  as  a  class.  According 
to  law,  ministers  were  the  local  superintendents  of  all 
the  schools,  and  very  ample  power  was  given  them  to 
assist,  or  to  check  the  teachers,  to  interfere,  to  rule, 
to  domineer.  This  might  have  been  a  wise  measure 
in  former  centuries.  But  now  the  teachers  understood 
and  performed  their  business  infinitely  better  than  the 
ministers  could  or  would  understand  and  perform  either 
their  own  business,  or  that  of  the  teachers.  No  won- 
der, therefore,  that  the  latter  should  chafe  under  the 
galling  yoke  imposed  upon  them,  especially  if  this 
yoke  was  made  more  oppressive  by  perverseness,  or 
haughtiness  on  the  part  of  the  superintendent.  I  sup- 
pose many  of  the  teachers  would  have  been  willing  to 
have  superintendents  chosen  from  among  the  people, 
or  chosen  by  the  people  from  among  the  ministers, 
but  they  could  not  be  satisfied  with  being  made,  indis- 
criminately, the  subjects  and  humble  servants  of  the 
ministers. 

As  soon  as  I  had  accepted  the  situation  I  have 
spoken  of,  I  had  ample  reason  for  being,  for  my  part, 
strengthened  in  this  aversion  against  the  existing  reg- 
ulations. The  school  committee,  and  the  second  min- 
ister of  the  parish  church  who  was  our  local  superin- 
tendent, had  a  grudge  against  one  of  the  older  teachers 


128 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


of  our  school,  and  had  hired  two  very  miserable  lodg- 
ing rooms  for  him.  He  refused  to  take  them,  and  as 
they  did  not  dare  to  force  him,  they  thought  they  had 
a  good  opportunity  of  getting  rid  of  the  matter  by 
giving  those  rooms  to  me,  a  new  comer  and  a  young 
man.  I  disappointed  them  by  refusing  in  my  turn. 
The  minister  tried  to  persuade  me,  then  to  frighten 
me  into  yielding. 

Thereupon  I  was  ordered  to  appear  before  the  con- 
sistory (our  ecclesiastical  tribunal)  where  they  also 
tried  to  persuade  and  to  threaten  me  into  acquiescence. 
As  there  was  no  inclination  on  either  side  to  give  up,  I 
told  them  I  should  appeal  to  the  central  government 
and  even  to  the  Grandduke  himself.  So  I  did,  explain- 
ing very  minutely  how  shabbily  my  superiors  intended 
to  treat  me.  The  result  was,  that  they  received  a 
warning  admonition,  and  that  they  had  to  pay  me  a 
sufficient  sum  of  money  wherewith  to  procure  lodgings 
for  myself. 

Still  the  government  was  so  partial  to  the  consistory 
and  the  minister,  that  l  was  not  even  directly  informed 
of  having  gained  my  cause.  The  very  people  against 
whom  I  had  petitioned,  were  the  only  ones  who  received 
the  above  decision  and  directions. 

This  incident  had  the  good  effect  to  rid  me  of  all 
further  trouble.  In  fact,  I  had  afterwards  not  a  single 
disagreeable  experience  with  any  minister,  and  since 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  129 


my  social  position  on  the  whole  was  so  very  satisfactory, 
I  had  no  right  to  complain  of  suffering,  personally, 
from  unjust  laws  and  regulations  and  prejudices  con- 
cerning teachers.  Still,  from  principle,  I  continued 
to  side  with  the  teachers  whenever  there  was  an  occa- 
sion for  showing  one's  sentiments  and  views. 

From  what  T  have  said,  it  is  apparent  that  my  situ- 
ation was  one  that  might  he  envied  by  many  of  my 
colleagues,  and  it  would  not  be  difficult  for  me  to  add 
some  more  remarks  which  would  prove  that  my  lot 
was  really — outwardly — a  very,  very  happy  one.  And 
yet  within  five  years  this  happiness  became  an  intoler- 
able burden  to  me  and  was  mingled  with  the  bitterest 
grief  and  mental  agony.  It  will  perhaps  be  impossi- 
ble fully  to  describe  and  to  explain  this,  still  I  will 
make  an  attempt  at  doing  so. 

During  the  first  summer  that  I  taught  gymnastics 
at  the  college,  I  found  that  many  students  were  much 
more  skilful  than  I,  for  I  had  never  been  taught  by 
any  one,  and  had  practised  but  little  by  myself  after 
having  sought  information  from  books.  Moreover  I 
was  hardly  older  than  some  of  the  students.  I  found 
it,  therefore,  hard  to  be  useful  to  the  scholars,  as  well 
as  to  retain  the  relation  of  superiority  which  a  teacher 
always  ought  to  maintain. 

Thus  I  felt  the  necessity  of  perfecting  myself  in 
gymnastics,  and  consequently  I  took  a  leave  of  absence, 
9 


130 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


and  went  to  the  capital  where  I  received  permission 
to  practise  with  the  subaltern  officers  of  the  garrison. 
This  happened  just  at  the  time  when  gymnastics  were 
the  favorite  and  most  flourishing  part  of  martial  train- 
ing, and  my  stay  there  produced  the  desired  effect. 
Practising  for  six  weeks,  every  day  four  or  five  hours, 
gymnastics,  fencing,  bayonet-fighting  and  common 
evolutions,  I  became  much  more  expert  in  these 
matters. 

At  the  same  time,  however,  I  had  an  opportunity 
to  see  human  life  under  a  new  aspect.  In  the  after- 
noon and  evening  I  frequented  several  circles  of 
military  and  literary  men,  into  which  the  lieutenant 
who  was  my  teacher,  introduced  me.  I  will  not  say 
that  I  met  there  persons  who  weakened  my  faith  in 
human  goodness  and  virtue,  still  I  associated,  more 
than  ever  before,  with  people  who  had  not  a  very 
exalted  idea  of  man's  destiny  and  man's  duties,  but 
made  great  demands  on  life  as  a  source  of  enjoyment. 

Thus,  I  think,  I  returned  home  a  better  teacher  of 
gymnastics  but  also,  more  than  ever  before,  inclined 
to  aspire  to  obtaining  worldly  treasures,  honor,  fame, 
rank,  money — though,  the  latter  not  for  its  own  sake, 
but  only  as  a  means  of  enjoyment. 

During  the  following  summer,  I  did  not  yet  succeed 
in  teaching  gymnastics  entirely  to  my  satisfaction. 
I  told,  therefore,  the  director  of  the  college  that  I 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY. 


131 


must  see  other  large  institutions  for  this  branch  of 
education,  so  as  to  know  where  the  secret  was  of  ruling 
and  guiding  a  large  number  of  boys  who  were  scat- 
tered over  a  large  place  and  practising  at  many  dif- 
ferent instruments  at  the  same  time  and  thus  escaping 
the  teacher's  immediate  notice. 

The  director  who  was  always  a  most  kind  patron 
and  friend  to  me,  offered,  if  possible,  to  procure  for 
me  the  "  nervus  rei  "  as  he  called  it,  and  although  I 
departed  before  he  could  do  so,  he  really  handed  me 
on  my  return,  after  an  absence  of  six  weeks,  a  sum  of 
money  which  almost  reimbursed  me  for  my  expenses  ; 
it  was  a  present,  solicited  and  received  from  the  Grand- 
duke. 

During  my  journey,  I  visited  Bremen,  Hanover, 
Brunswick,  Magdeburg,  Dessau,  Berlin,  Leipsic  and 
Dresden.  I  saw  the  gymnasiums  of  the  different  places, 
and  was  exceedingly  interested  in  the  arrangement, 
management  and  working  of  some  of  these  institu- 
tions.  In  Berlin,  I  visited  the  place  where  Jahn,  the 
father  of  gymnastics,  had  trained  the  youths  of  the 
city  and  of  the  university  to  become  strong  and  bold 
defenders  of  their  fatherland,  against  the  invading 
foe,  against  the  victorious  French. 

This  place  was  now  laid  out  in  beautiful  terraces, 
filled  with  a  gymnastic  apparatus  of  every  description 
and  variety  where  eight  hundred  youths  practised,  all 


132 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


dressed  in  the  "  Turner's  "  costume — white  pantaloons, 
and  white,  or  bluejackets. 

In  several  of  the  places  I  visited,  I  was  disappointed, 
finding  the  teachers  of  gymnastics  to  be  persons  of 
no  culture  or  refinement,  and  the  exercises  to  be  con- 
ducted without  any  order  or  propriety.  Thus  I  had 
the  consolation  to  find  out  that  my  own  unpleasant 
experience  was  not  a  solitary  fact,  but  a  general  one  ; 
that  it  was  either  natural  and  unavoidable,  or  that 
there  was  a  flaw  in  the  system. 

I  was  fully  satisfied  only  in  one  place  viz.  in  Dessau, 
in  the  gymnastic  and  orthopaedic  Institute  of  Pro- 
fessor Werner.  And  this  Institute  was  decried  by  the 
Turners  in  general  as  a  humbug.  It  is  true,  there 
was  much  show ;  still,  while  dancing  and  conversing 
with  the  young  ladies  there,  I  was  convinced  that  Mr. 
W.  had  produced  wonderful  cures  of  deformities. 
And  during  the  daily  exercises  and  performances  the 
strictest  order  was  enforced,  and  beauty  and  grace 
were  the  end  in  view  rather  than  mere  force.  During 
the  present  civilized  age,  I  think  the  latter  ought 
never  to  be  tolerated  when  being  rude  and  brutal,  but 
always  ought  to  be  combined  with  the  former. 

During  my  journey,  I  did  not  turn  my  attention 
exclusively  to  my  principal  object.  I  tried  to  see  and 
to  learn  as  much  as  possible  of  life  in  its  various 
aspects  and  phases. 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  133 


Wherever  I  stopped  I  went  to  the  opera,  to  the 
theatre,  to  concerts,  to  museums,  to  dancing  halls  and 
other  places  of  amusement  for  the  higher  and  lower 
classes  of  society.  In  Berlin,  I  made  it  my  particular 
object  to  become  familiar  with  the  life  and  pursuits 
of  university  students.  Some  of  my  friends  were 
studying  there  at  the  time  ;  I  went  with  them  to  their 
lectures,  and  heard  Neander,  Mitscherlich  and  other 
celebrated  men.  I  entered  fully  into  the  students' 
mode  of  spending  and  enjoying  their  leisure  time, 
and  as  the  students  in  Berlin  were  said  to  be  rather 
sober  and  hardworking,  compared  with  those  of  most 
other  German  universities,  I  was  confirmed  in  my 
opinion,  first,  that  the  German  universities  afford  an 
opportunity  of  hearing  the  most  erudite  men  in  the 
world ;  secondly,  that  the  regulations  of  the  univer- 
sity, however,  do  not  make  it  easy  for,  and  incumbent 
on  the  students  to  derive  full  benefit  from  these 
facilities ;  thirdly,  that  very  many  students  spend  their 
three  or  four  years  very  unprofitably  at  the  university 
as  to  advancement  in  book-learning  and  thorough 
scientific  education  ;  fourthly,  that  it  is  altogether  a 
false  notion  to  make  a  stay  at  a  university  the  cri- 
terion of  a  man's  moral,  intellectual,  social,  politic 
and  civic  worth. 

In  Berlin,  I  also  went  to  see  Diesterweg  to  whom  I 
gained  access  by  a  letter  of  introduction. 


134 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


D.  was,  at  that  time,  one  of  the  most  celebrated 
men  in  the  department  of  education,  and  I  rejoiced 
in  seeing  and  examining  the  Seminary  and  model 
school  which  were  under  his  direction. 

One  of  the  most  important  incidents  of  my  journey 
was  the  last  meeting  of  the  "  friends  of  light  "  which 
I  attended  in  Dessau.  Some  time  before,  Johannes 
Kongo  had  stirred  up  the  general  interest  in  religious 
matters  by  his  attacks  upon  the  Jesuits,  upon  the 
pilgrimages  to  the  wonderworking  seamless  coat  of 
Christ  at  Treves  &c.  I  do  not  know  whether  he  was 
not  capable,  or  not  worthy  of  being  leader  of  a  new 
religious  sect,  or  whether  the  impediments  which  the 
governments  placed  in  the  way  of  his  followers,  were 
sufficient  to  kill  the  flower  in  the  bud  ;  the  fact  is,  the 
new  German  catholic  congregations  soon  decreased  in 
number,  size  and  internal  life.  Still,  I  think  Konge's 
movement  bore  a  share  in  producing,  or  at  least  in 
eliciting  a  greater  interest  in  religion  among  the 
protest  ants. 

In  and  about  Magdeburg  especially,  several  liberal 
ministers  and  literary  men  began  publicly  to  deliver 
speeches  on  religious  subjects.  This  was  done  outside 
of  the  church — taking  this  word  as  well  in  the  mean- 
ing of  "  edifice  "  as  of  "  institution.  "  The  meetings 
were  generally  held  at  the  different  railway  stations 
where  the  beautiful  and  spacious  halls  of  the  usually 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  135 


splendid  depots  afforded  a  convenient  place,  easy  of 
access.  The  tendency  of  all  the  speeches  was  as  well 
to  induce  the  people  to  free  themselves  from  the 
cramping  fetters  of  an  established  church,  as  to  free 
themselves  from  the  fetters  of  a  creed  which  could  no 
longer  satisfy  the  minds  and  consciences  of  an  enlight- 
ened age  and  of  an  enlightened  nation. 

This  was  certainly  the  tendency,  though  on  the 
other  hand  everything  was  conducted  with  great  pro?- 
priety  and  loyalty.  I  am  convinced,  there  were  many 
men  engaged  in  this  movement  who  sincerely  believed 
they  had  hit  upon  the  right  means  of  making  their 
fellow-men  wiser  and  better — more  religious. 

The  different  governments,  however,  could  not  look 
with  indifference  upon  the  existence  of  the  societies 
of  these  "  friends  of  light "  and  upon  their  rapid 
extension  and  propaganda.  They  forbade  these  meet- 
ings in  one  state  after  another.  The  duke  of  Dessau 
was  the  last  to  put  in  his  veto,  and  thus  the  people  of 
the  surrounding  states  flocked  several  times  together 
on  his  territory.  But  in  the  meeting  at  which  I  was 
present,  it  was  known,  that  that  would  be  the  last  one 
they  should  be  allowed  to  hold.  Thus  an  indescribable 
sorrow  and  gloom  pervaded  the  whole  assembly  and 
its  proceedings. 

Personally,  I  concurred  in  the  liberal  views  and 
iieterodox  opinions  which  all  the  speakers  expressed, 


136 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


but  at  that  time  I  could  not  make  up  my  mind  to 
believe  that  the  common  people  were  prepared  for 
seeing  pulled  down  the  whole  structure  of  time- 
hallowed  creeds  and  institutions.  Still,  I  could  not 
help  thinking  that  the  German  people  were  not  to  be 
blamed  if  they  kept  aloof  from  religion  as  it  was 
forced  upon  them.  I  felt  sure  that  I  admired  Frederic 
the  Great,  the  friend  of  Voltaire,  more  than  his 
"  pious  93  descendant  Frederic  William  IV,  were  it  only 
for  that  word  of  his  "  Let  every  one  become  blessed 
after  his  own  fashion. 99 

The  assembly  dispersed  quietly  and  orderly  with  a 
sad  farewell,  and  I  was  more  than  ever  convinced  that 
religion  and  true  piety  could  not  be  expected  to  flourish 
where  state  and  church  are  united,  where  the  heads 
and  the  officials  and  the  sycophants  of  the  two  recipro- 
cally abet  and  aid  each  other  in  using  and  abusing 
the  people  as  a  means  of  promoting  their  own  worldly 
interests. 

Another  incident  occurred  in  Dessau  which  very 
forcibly  led  me  to  think  of  my  own  state  of  mind  and 
character.  One  morning,  while  taking  a  walk  in  the 
suburbs,  I  noticed  a  building,  which,  according  to  an 
inscription,  was  a  school  for  poor  and  neglected  chil- 
dren. I  walked  in,  and  being  introduced  to  the  director, 
I  asked  permission  from  him  to  see  the  institution. 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  137 


I  found  him  to  be  a  very  affable  man  and  a  true- 
hearted  imitator  and  follower  of  Pestalozzi. 

He  politely  showed  me  the  different  parts  of  the 
institution.  By  entreaty  and  persuasion  he  had 
gathered  together  about  two  hundred  poor  children. 
He  taught  them  not  only  all  the  branches  of  a  com- 
mon school  education,  but  he  gave  the  older  boys  an 
opportunity  to  learn  any  trade  they  had  a  particular 
liking  for  ;  he  let  the  girls  learn  whatever  was  practi- 
cally useful  for  them,  housework,  sewing  &c,  and  the 
smaller  children  were  employed,  a  few  hours  daily,  in 
assorting  rags,  bones,  broken  glass  &c.  Each  one 
thus  contributed  a  little  to  supporting  the  institution  ; 
yea,  it  was  almost  entirely  supported  by  itself.  The 
children  were  allowed  to  sleep  at  home,  and  I  was 
told  the  instances  were  not  rare,  where  it  was  evident 
that  they  had  a  good  influence  at  home  and  had  dif- 
fused a  better  spirit  through  a  whole  family. 

I  met  in  the  institution  four  young  men  who  took 
a  part  in  the  labors  of  teaching  &c.  They  were  vol- 
unteers ;  they  had  come  from  different  parts  of  Ger- 
many to  make  themselves  acquainted  with  the  working 
of  the  system  of  this  school,  and  then,  probably,  to 
transplant  it  into  their  native  places.  I  could  not  help 
asking  myself  whether  I  would  be  willing  to  do  the 
same,  and  was  obliged  to  confess  that  I  was  not  hum- 


138 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


ble  and  good  enough  to  sacrifice  my  actual  position  to 
such  an  undertaking. 

This  thought  overpowered  and  confused  me  so  much 
that  on  taking  leave  of  the  director  aud  expressing 
my  admiration,  I  added,  "  I  hope  this  visit  will  do  me 
good."    He  smiled  and  dismissed  me  with  kind  wishes. 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  139 


CHAPTER  VIII. 

EARLY  MANHOOD.     THIRD  PERIOD. 

The  state  of  mind  I  have  alluded  to,  developed 
itself  more  and  more  after  my  return  home.  The 
greater  number  of  the  girls  I  taught,  belonged  to  the 
poorer  classes,  and  I  found  that  teaching  them  became 
more  and  more  a  burden  to  me,  so  that  I  disliked  to 
have  this  duty  for  the  principal  part  of  my  business. 
Certainly,  therefore,  I  should  have  been  much  less 
willing  to  dedicate  myself  entirely  to  teaching  these 
children. 

If  I  should  say  how  this  dislike  could  spring  up  and 
grow  in  me,  I  believe  an  explanation  may  be  found  in 
the  following  circumstances.  Though  I  might  believe 
in  the  existence  of  a  God,  still  this  belief  was  no  prac- 
tical faith.  My  mind  was  biased  and  was  bent  rather 
upon  denying  and  combatting  those  parts  of  our  reli- 
gion and  creed  which  I  believed  to  be  erroneous,  than  to 
be  satisfied  with  the  simple,  essential,  and  incontestable 
part  of  the  Christian  religion.  I  could  not,  therefore, 
believe  that  God  had  destined  me  to  remaining  in  the 
station  I  held,  and  could  not  in  humility  perform  my 
duties  as  a  labor  made  easy  by  love  and  obedience  to 
God.    Nor  did  love  to  man  enter  into  my  character 


140 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


in  such  a  way  as  to  be  a  motive  for  self-sacrificing 
charity. 

I  loved  those  that  loved  me,  and  did  good  to  them 
whenever  I  could  do  so  without  encountering  any  par- 
ticular difficulty.  About  the  remainder  of  society,  at 
least  considering  them  as  individuals,  I  concerned  my- 
self very  little. 

Worldly  considerations  there  were  none  that  could 
attach  me  more  strongly  to  my  principal  business.  Its 
pecuniary  advantages  were  very  small ;  by  teaching 
one  hour  gymnastics  I  earned  more  than  by  teaching 
school  a  whole  day.  Since  my  education  had  been 
better  than  that  of  most  of  the  primary  teachers,  I 
considered  myself  worthy  of  teaching  other  branches 
than  the  common  ones.  With  the  parents  of  my 
scholars  I  had  hardly  any  intercourse  and  connection  ; 
I  mingled  in  society  with  a  class  of  persons  who  looked 
down  upon  most  of  those  people  as  their  inferiors,  and 
in  this  social  position  I  maintained  myself,  therefore, 
in  spite  of  my  official  position. 

When  I  became  fully  aware  of  this  condition,  I 
resolved  upon  extricating  myself  from  such  a  dilemma 
by  giving  up  school  teaching,  and  by  dedicating  myself 
entirely  to  gymnastics.  This  branch  began  to  be  so 
popular  in  the  country  that  it  seemed  to  open  to  me 
a  career  satisfactory  in  a  two-fold  aspect.  First,  I 
might  expect  such  worldly  rewards  from  it  as  I  then 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY. 


141 


aspired  to  obtain  ;  secondly,  I  looked  upon  gymnastics 
with  more  trust  as  to  their  usefulness  and  efficiency 
than  upon  any  other  branch  of  education. 

However,  when  I  revealed  my  intention  to  my 
parents,  I  met  wdth  such  decided  opposition  that  I  felt 
obliged  to  give  up  this  idea. 

Thus  I  went  on  plodding  in  the  usual  way,  without 
being  with  heart  and  soul  engaged  in  the  most  impor- 
tant part  of  my  work.  No  observer  could  be  aware  of 
this  fact,  because  I  performed  my  duties  with  the  utmost 
punctuality,  more  so  than  several  of  the  other  teachers 
with  whom  I  was  connected.  Yea,  I  did  more.  Once 
when  one  of  our  teachers,  my  particular  friend,  was 
dangerously  sick,  I  united  his  scholars  with  mine,  and 
thus  I  taught  one  hundred  and  forty  children  for  three 
months  without  asking  any  of  the  other  teachers  to 
aid  me. 

Since  my  mind  was  not  absorbed  in  my  daily  busi- 
ness, it  turned  itself  to  other  objects.  Though,  as  I 
said,  my  actions  were  not  prompted  by  charity  to  indi- 
viduals, by  a  practical  philanthropy,  still  the  objects  I 
chose,  pertained  to  philanthropy  in  the  abstract,  in 
theory.  I  succeeded  in  most  of  them  ;  if  not  always 
in  the  form,  at  least  in  the  substance  viz.  as  far  as 
they  had  not  been  prompted  by  really  selfish  motives. 

For  instance,  I  published  an  article  endeavoring  to 
show  that  singing  ought  not  to  be  the  prerogative  of 


142 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


the  higher  classes,  as  it  was  then  and  there ;  but  that 
the  burghers  and  even  the  journey-men  (Gesellen) 
ought  to  have  their  glee-clubs. 

A  few  days  after,  a  gentleman  called  on  me,  saying, 
a  number  of  citizens  had  resolved  upon  following  my 
advice  ;  he  asked  me  to  join  the  glee-club  they  were 
ahout  to  form.  Sometime  afterwards  the  journeymen 
also  formed  a  singing  society  of  their  own.  If  I  had 
had  some  expectation  of  being  called  upon  to  act  as 
leader  of  these  societies,  I  was  disappointed  in  this 
respect ;  a  man  older  and  more  experienced  than  I, 
was  chosen. 

At  another  time,  I  published  anonymously  an  arti- 
cle showing  the'necessity  of  controlling  the  organ-grind- 
ers, in  regard  to  the  songs  they  brought  before  the 
public.  A  few  weeks  later  the  government  issued  a  law 
enjoining  upon  the  magistrates  not  to  allow  the  organ- 
grinders  &c.  to  bring  any  immoral  songs  and  pictures 
before  the  public. 

When  the  different  glee-clubs  in  the  city  and  in  the 
country  were  firmly  established,  I  proposed  to  them  to 
meet  once  every  year,  for  a  grand  festival.  I  offered 
to  be  a  medium  for  interchanging  the  songs  which 
each  society  would  like  to  have  sung  by  all  the  others. 
I  am  not  sure  that  I  sought  personal  aggrandizement  by 
this  measure,  since  it  seemed  to  be  a  necessary  practi- 
cal expedient,  and  I  do  not  feel  obliged  to  accuse  my- 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  143 


self  of  ambition.  Still  I  was  violently  attacked  upon 
this  ground  by  some  anonymous  writer,  apparently  a 
secret  enemy,  and  I  bad  to  fight  a  literary  feud.  It 
was  quite  an  ordeal  for  me,  but  on  the  whole  it  did 
me  good  in  every  respect.  My  proposals  were  not 
passed  by  unheeded.  Another  gentleman  took  up  the 
affair,  declaring  to  me  that  he  acted  upon  hints  received 
from  me,  and  the  following  summer  we  celebrated, 
with  great  success,  our  first  annual  singers'  festival. 

When  I  saw  Diesterweg  in  Berlin,  he  was  very  enthu- 
siastic about  preparing  and  causing  all  over  Germany 
a  grand  celebration  of  the  centennial  anniversary  of 
Pestalozzi's  birth-day. 

He  asked  me  to  work  for  it  at  home.  Accordingly 
I  invited  some  teachers  to  meet  for  a  consultation.  We 
agreed  upon  the  necessary  expedients,  and  the  result 
of  our  exertions  was  most  gratifying.  The  teachers 
of  the  whole  province  responded  to  our  invitation  and 
met  in  full  numbers  on  the  appointed  day.  We  had 
not  invited  any  ministers,  even  not  the  teachers  of  the 
college  who  were  men  educated  at  a  university.  Thus 
entire  harmony,  equality,  freedom  and  conviviality 
reigned  during  our  festival  which  began  with  speeches, 
poems,  discussions  and  singing,  and  ended  with  a  din- 
ner which  was  enlivened  by  appropriate  toasts  aud 
refreshing,  unreserved  conversation.  The  fruit  of  this 
festival  was  the  formation  of  teachers*  conferences  viz. 


144 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


monthly  meetings  'of  the  teachers  of  several  small 
districts,  and  annual  meetings  of  the  teachers  of  the 
whole  province. 

I  had  the  pleasure  of  witnessing,  for  a  few  years, 
the  beneficent  results  of  these  institutions,  and  later, 
I  have  had  friendly  greetings  from  them  sent  over  to 
me  across  the  ocean. 

If  I  was  thus  partly  engaged  in  unwelcome  duties 
and  partly  in  self-chosen  and  welcome  labors,  still  I 
had  plenty  of  time  left  to  employ  for  some  other  pur- 
pose, and  this  time  I  did  employ  most  fully  and  assid- 
uously in — worldly  enjoyments.  Before  dinner,  I  went, 
as  others  did,  to  a  club  to  "  sharpen  one's  appetite," 
to  hear  the  news,  to  pass  away  the  time.  On  those 
afternoons  which  were  free  from  school-duties,  I  went 
to  some  coffee  garden  outside  of  the  city  where  play- 
ing ninepins  was  the  usual  amusement.  In  the  eve- 
ning I  went,  once  every  week,  or  every  fortnight,  to 
the  "  aristocratic "  glee-club,  once  to  the  burghers' 
glee-club,  once  to  a  singing  society  for  ladies  and  gen- 
tlemen, once  to  the  glee-club  which  I  had  formed  while 
living  with  my  parents. 

On  those  evenings  which  brought  nothing  particular, 
I  went  to  a  club  where  we  conversed  and  drank,  and 
played  cards  and  lotto ;  or  I  passed  the  evening  with 
some  friends  at  home  over  a  glass  of  beer,  or  wine,  or 
a  bowl  of  punch.    I  was  a  member  of  three  different 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  145 


dancing  societies  or  casinos,  the  aristocratic,  the  citi- 
zens', and  the  young  men's  casino. 

These  societies  had  monthly  festivities,  and  thus  I 
danced  on  three  Sunday  evenings,  every  month.  Be- 
sides I  went  to  almost  all  the  balls  which  were  arranged 
on  other  days,  on  some  particular  occasion. 

Thus  days,  months  and  years  of  my  life  passed 
away — apparently  the  most  delightful  source  of  activ- 
ity and  happiness,  and  yet  in  fact  only  a  whirl,  a 
constant  change  of  burdensome  duties  and  of  a  round 
of  enjoyments  and  gaieties.  The  latter  seemed  to  be 
the  only  means  of  appeasing  the  soul's  longing  for 
something  to  interest  itself  in.  When  I,  sometimes 
during  a  conversation  with  my  parents,  hinted  at  this 
unsatisfactory  state  of  things,  my  mother  always 
recommended  to  me,  as  she  believed,  a  panacea  by 
advising  me  to  take  a  situation  as  teacher  and  organist 
in  the  country,  to  get  married  and  thus  quietly  to 
settle  down.  But  I  would  not  listen  to  such  an  advice. 
I  would  not  leave  the  city  again.  And  while  in  the 
city  I  could  not  think  of  getting  married.  I  was  not 
willing  to  deny  myself  the  worldly  enjoyments  for 
which  I  was  then,  as  a  single  person,  fully  able  to  pay, 
but  which  I  could  not  have  afforded  in  married  life. 
Moreover,  any  of  the  ladies  with  whom  I  associated, 
and  who  then  considered  me  as  their  equal,  would 
hardly  have  been  willing  to  descend  into  the  station 
10 


146 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


of  a  primary  teacher's  wife.  And  to  marry  any  one 
who  would  have  seemed  inferior  to  these  ladies — this 
idea  was  too  revolting  to  me,  seriously  to  occupy  my 
thoughts. 

Fortunately  an  event  happened  which  brought  to  a 
close  (or  at  least  to  a  crisis)  this  dangerous  state  of 
wavering  between  moral  and  spiritual  life  and  death. 
Like  a  thunderbolt  the  news  of  the  French  revolution 
(Feb.  1848)  burst  upon  our  quiet  and  peaceful  lives. 

It  produced  in  me,  as  well  as  in  others,  an  enthu- 
siasm, almost  a  delirium,  such  as  I  had  never  experi- 
enced and  witnessed  before.  Nor  do  I  think  that  I 
should  be  able  ever  to  experience  such  a  feeling 
again ;  it  was  too  beautiful,  too  intense 'to  bless  a  man's 
life  more  than  once.  Truly  if  it  is  as  poets  say,  that 
man  can  love  only  once,  it  is  no  less  certain  that  such 
a  patriotic  enthusiasm  never  can  be  rekindled  when  it 
has  died  away.  And  alas !  the  flames  which  the 
French  revolution  in  '48  kindled  in  so  many  hearts, 
were  extinguished  so  very,  very  soon ! 

However,  if  the  events  of  that  Spring  afterwards 
seemed  to  be  but  a  pleasant  fleeting  dream;  at  the 
time,  at  least,  they  were  as  intense  a  reality  as  any- 
thing can  be.  To  me  they  were  for  a  short  time 
identified  with  life  itself,  because  they  opened  to  me 
a  new  world,  or  rather  a  new  era  into  which  the  thirst- 
ing soul  could  look  with  new  hopes  of  universal  regen 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  147 


oration  and  of  finding  a  stay  and  contents  for  an 
individual  life,  full  of  meaning  and  utility. 

I  must  not  attempt  to  give  an  outline  of  the 
events  of  that  time  in  general.  We,  in  our  remote 
part  of  Germany,  could  take  only  a  general,  sympa- 
thizing interest  in  the  general  affairs  of  Europe,  or 
even  of  our  fatherland ;  but  we  had  besides  enough  to 
do — practically,  in  our  own  state.  Though  our  gov- 
ernment had  not  treated  its  subjects  quite  so  badly  as 
many  others  in  Germany  had  done,  still,  this  was  only 
the  consequence  of  the  Grand-duke's  forbearance  and 
of  other  accidental  circumstances. 

Our  civil  rights  had  not  been  established;  we  had 
no  guarantee  for  being  governed  with  justice  and 
equity.  The  sovereigns  of  Germany  had  promised 
their  subjects  a  constitution  when  the  nation  had  so 
heroically  risen  to  free  the  country  from  Napoleon's 
dominion.  But  the  Grand-dukes  of  Oldenburg  had 
not  fulfilled  that  promise ;  they  had  not  even  given  a 
mock  constitution  as  most  other  German  sovereigns 
had  done.  We  had  no  jury,  no  freedom  of  the  press, 
no  militia.  We  were  not  allowed  to  hold  meetings  of 
any  kind  without  permission  from  government  officers. 
No  parish,  or  county  business  could  be  transacted; 
no  institutions  could  be  carried  on  by  the  people  them- 
selves without  the  supervision  and  interference  of  the 
government. 


148 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


The  sovereign  gave  no  account  of  the  use  he  made 
of  the  taxes  which  were,  moreover,  imposed  and  col- 
lected without  the  people's  consent ;  nohody  knew  how 
much  of  the  public  revenues  was  used  for  government 
purposes,  and  how  much  for  the  Grand-duke's  own 
court. 

All  this  flashed  upon  the  minds  of  the  people  as 
soon  as  the  French  revolution  gave  an  impulse  to 
political  discussion  and  activity.  And  as  our  govern- 
ment, as  well  as  the  others,  seemed  to  he  paralyzed, 
we  felt  entirely  free  to  follow  the  impetus  of  the 
moment.  The  town  in  which  I  lived,  was  the  foremost 
in  the  movement. 

From  one  of  the  mass  meetings  we  held,  we  sent  a 
deputation  of  five  citizens  to  the  Grand-duke  to  peti- 
tion for  a  constitution.  We  requested  them  to  send 
word  if  the  Grand-duke  did  not  yield,  and  we  would 
come  at  a  minute's  warning  to  support  their  petition 
by  the  threats,  and  if  need  be,  by  the  use  of  arms. 

The  Grand-duke  yielded,  and,  I  think,  in  better 
faith  than  most  of  the  other  sovereigns,  for  we  had 
very  soon  almost  all  we  wished  for  at  the  moment. 
A  legislature  was  chosen  on  tolerably  liberal  princi- 
ples ;  it  framed  a  constitution,  and  the  Grand-duke 
accepted  the  same,  though  it  granted,  perhaps,  more 
to  the  people  than  any  other  limited  monarchy  on  the 
continent. 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  149 


In  all  the  movements  which  accompanied  and  im- 
mediately followed  this  great  change,  I  took  an  intense 
interest  and  as  active  a  part  as  circumstances  allowed. 
I  cannot  tell  with  what  sanguine  hopes  I  advocated 
and  assisted  the  formation  of  a  burgher-guard,  or 
opened  and  recommenced  in  the  Spring  the  military 
and  gymnastic  exercises  of  the  college  students,  or 
tried  to  do  some  good  by  speaking  in  public  meetings 
and  by  writing  for  the  press.  And  when  the  legis- 
lature had  almost  finished  its  general  work  and  was 
expected  soon  to  deliberate  about  special  laws  and 
institutions,  there  were  new  incentives  for  hopeful 
activity. 

I  engaged  in  bringing  about  a  general  conference 
of  the  primary  teachers  of  our  province  where  the 
future  organization  of  the  schools  was  discussed.  A 
committee  was  chosen  to  draft  a  sketch  of  a  "  school- 
law  and  to  send  it  with  a  petition  to  the  legislature. 
I  acted  as  secretary  and  was  busy  day  and  night,  until 
the  matter  had  been  discussed,  indicted,  accepted, 
signed  by  the  whole  body,  and  dispatched  to  the  legis- 
lature. 

While  being  thus  concerned  about  the  institutions 
of  my  native  state,  I  watched  as  most  others  did,  the 
progress  of  national  affairs  with  the  intensest  interest. 
We  believed  our  most  sanguine  hopes  would  be  realized. 
At  national  and  provincial  singing  festivals  we  had  so 


150 


TIIE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


often  sung  our  beautiful  national  hymn  :  "  what  is 
the  German's  fatherland"?  We  believed  that  this 
question  would  now  be  answered  in  a  satisfactory 
manner;  that  Germany  would  be  one  in  fact  and  not 
only  in  name ;  that  it  would  be  harmonious  and  free 
within  and  respected  abroad,  its  national  flag  "  black, 
red  and  gold"  being  admitted,  recognized  and  saluted 
on  all  the  oceans  of  the  globe.  Alas !  how  cruelly 
were  such  hopes  deceived  !  The  Parliament  in  Frank- 
fort talked  while  they  ought  to  have  acted,  and  soon 
all  prospects  of  national  greatness,  unity,  freedom 
and  honor  were  lost,  buried  under  the  political,  if  not 
the  moral  ruin  of  the  popular  and  truly  democratic 
movement. 

The  governments  awoke  from  the  lethargy  into 
which  fear  and  momentary  impotence  had  thrown 
them,  and  either  guided  by  base  love  of  tyranny, 
or  deluded  by  a  blind  belief  in  their  own  rights  and 
usefulness,  they  drew  the  reins  of  law  and  violence 
tighter  than  ever  before,  and  crushed  the  national 
movement.  And  very  soon,  when  the  "reaction"  felt 
its  own  strength,  the  new  liberal  institutions  of  the 
single  states  were  also  abolished,  or  at  least  greatly 
modified.  In  my  native  state  the  constitution  was 
revised,  and  robbed  of  many  of  its  best  features ;  and 
the  special  laws  we  had  expected,  were  either  given  up, 
or  appeared  mangled  and  curtailed.    The  people  and 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY. 


151 


their  leaders  made  all  this  easy  for  the  governments. 
The  masses,  on  the  whole,  showed  no  energy,  and  in 
the  few  instances  where  they  did  show  their  strength, 
there  it  ended  in  deeds  of  violence  and  cruelty  against 
the  life  and  property  of  their  oppressors,  and  some- 
times even  of  innocent  persons. 

The  leaders  of  the  democratic  party  were  not  all 
pure  patriots ;  many  tried  to  use  the  masses  merely 
as  a  pedestal  for  their  own  aggrandizement.  The 
well-meaning  and  virtuous  among  the  people  and  its 
leaders,  were  either  too  slow  to  move  and  to  act  at 
the  right  time,  or  too  trustful,  hoping  that  the  govern- 
ments and  everybody  else  would  now  do  right  with- 
out being  watched,  urged,  or  subdued,  as  if  all  on  a 
sudden  the  time  had  come  when  the  lion  and  the 
lamb  would  peacefully  lie  down  together.  If  there 
were  any  men  who  were  free  from  all  selfishness,  and 
had  at  the  same  time  a  large  heart  and  a  clear  head, 
they  .were  either  crashed  by  the  pressure  from  above 
and  from  below,  or  their  efforts  were  at  least  fruitless, 
because  they  were  isolated  and  badly  supported. 

I  do  not  mention  these  sad  occurrences  and  experi- 
ences, for  the  sake  of  blaming  others,  and  of  complain- 
ing about  the  ignorance,  perverseness  and  meanness 
of  individuals,  or  of  the  masses.  No  man  has  a  right 
to  complain  of  others,  until  he  has  exhausted  all  the 
means  for  guiding  and  improving  them,  that  are  at 


152 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


his  command.  When  a  man  sees  that  the  leaders  of 
the  people  are  not  wise,  or  virtuous  enough  to  carry 
their  fellow-citizens  to  the  goal  of  liberty,  justice  and 
prosperity,  then  he  ought  to  aspire  to  being  leader 
himself,  if  he  will  deserve  the  name  of  a  true  patriot. 
He  ought  not  to  give  up  struggling  for  such  a  posi- 
tion, as  long  as  there  is  a  breath  of  life  in  him,  and 
he  may  be  sure,  if  he  is  the  man,  if  he  is  wise,  coura- 
geous and  sincere — then  he  will  be  the  chief,  and  he 
will  lead  his  people  gloriously,  through  all  difficulties 
and  dangers,  to  the  goal  before  them — if  it  is  God's 
will. 

If  a  man  fails  in  any  undertaking,  though  he 
thinks  he  has  acted  prudently  and  has  used  all  the 
means  he  could  use,  then  let  him  be  sure  of  this  thing  : 
he  has  failed  either  because  his  undertaking  was  not 
in  accordance  with  God's  plan  for  the  universe,  for  the 
earth,  for  the  human  race,  for  the  destiny  of  individ- 
uals, or  because  the  undertaking  was  intended  to  pro- 
mote some  selfish  end.  Accordance  with  God's  will 
and  absence  of  egoism,  these  are  the  two  things  which 
make  a  man  infallible  and  sure  of  success  ;  within  the 
sphere  prescribed  by  these  limits,  he  is  christlike,  god- 
like— almighty.  He  may  lose  his  life  in  the  cause 
he  struggles  for,  but  his  death  will  be  the  victory  of 
his  cause;  the  individual  may  perish,  but  the  spirit 
will  live ;  short-sighted  mortal  witnesses  may  deem 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  153 


such  a  hero  and  martyr  unfortunate  and  his  attempts 
a  failure  ;  but  future  ages  and  their  history  will  un- 
fold the  secret  and  testify  to  his  success. 

This  truth  we  find  verified  in  the  history  of  the 
heroes  and  martyrs  of  all  ages — and  in  no  instance 
more  strikingly,  more  divinely  true  than  in  the  histo- 
ry of  the  founder  of  our  religion. 

At  the  time  of  which  I  have  been  writing,  this 
truth  had  never  been  clearly  brought  home  to  my 
mind,  and  there  was  not  a  vestige  of  such  a  genuine 
heroism  in  me.  No  wonder,  therefore,  that  I  then 
thought  I  had  a  right  to  complain  of  others,  to  grieve 
about  the  mistakes  and  crimes  that  were  committed, 
to  be  discouraged  by  the  sorrowful  and  miserable  end 
of  a  political  and  social  revolution  which  seemed  so 
bright  and  promising  in  the  beginning. 

The  last  tie  which  had  retained  me  in  a  worthy  and 
ennobling  union  with  my  fellow-men,  began  to  loosen  ; 
the  last  star  which  had  shone  in  the  firmament  of  my 
moral  and  spiritual  world,  faded  away,  and  all  around 
me  became  darkness  and  utter  ruin. 

For  the  sake  of  merely  making  a  living,  I  could 
not  continue  my  business ;  or  with  other  words,  my 
maxim  was  not  that  which  Werner  advocates  in  his 
letter  to  Wilhem  Meister :  "  Perform  your  business, 
make  money,  enjoy  yourself  with  your  kindred,  and 
concern  yourself  about  the  remainder  of  the  world  no 


154 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


more  than  as  far  as  you  can  make  it  subservient  to 
your  own  advantage.'7 

On  the  one  hand  teaching  seemed,  therefore,  to  me 
too  hard  a  business  to  undertake  it  for  so  mean  an 
object. 

And  really  it  began  to  be  harder  and  harder  for  me. 
I  would  not  give  up  being  punctual  and  faithful ;  still 
I  could  not  interest  myself  in  the  duty  of  the  hour, 
and  consequently  could  not  interest  my  scholars,  so 
that  it  was  hard  for  me  to  make  them  progress  in 
their  studies,  and  without  rigorous  measures  to  keep 
them  in  as  strict  obedience  and  order  as  I  wished  to. 
On  the  other  hand  teaching  seemed  to  me  too  noble  a 
task  to  be  undertaken  without  an  inward  calling, 
without  faith,  without  love.  This  love  of  children, 
love  of  individuals  on  the  whole  which  is  so  necessary 
for  a  teacher — I  was  destitute  of  it ;  I  knew  I  was 
destitute  of  it,  and  I  knew,  therefore,  that  I  could 
not  be  successful  and  happy  as  a  teacher. 

My  love  to  mankind  in  general,  my  faith  in  its 
worthiness  of  being  cared  for,  had  been  shaken.  I 
know  I  did  not  lose  my  faith  in  the  perfectibility  of 
mankind.  I  recollect  I  spoke  one  day  of  the  causes 
which  made  the  revolution  of  that  epoch  a  failure.  I 
said  it  would  take  a  long  time  to  prepare  the  nations 
of  Europe  for  a  republican  government ;  education 
ought  first  to  dispel  ignorance  and  immorality.  A 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  155 

friend  replied  to  this :  "  Thus  you  think  that  we 
teachers  are  the  real  revolutionists  of  the  future?" 
1  replied  in  the  affirmative.  Still  I  did  not  feel  the 
mental  and  moral  capacity  in  me,  to  do  a  great  work 
as  a  teacher,  and  I  was  not  self-sacrificing  enough 
willingly  to  be  a  humble  member  of  that  noble  band 
of  revolutionists,  to  resolve  upon  a  life  of  toil  and 
resignation,  and  yet  to  be  insignificant,  to  disappear 
like  a  drop  of  water  in  the  Ocean. 

My  religion  was  at  that  time  purely  negative  in  its 
influence  upon  my  actions.  I  believed  in  God's 
supremacy  over  the  world  and  mankind,  so  far  that  I 
considered  it  man's  duty  to  look  upon  his  life  as  a 
gift  from  God,  which  he  had  no  right  wilfully  to 
give  up.  Consequently  I  never  was  in  danger  of  de- 
termining upon  suicide  as  the  means  of  ridding  my- 
self of  my  earthly  existence,  though  during  that 
gloomy  period,  life  seemed  to  me  a  riddle,  or  perhaps 
a  thing  without  meaning,  yea,  an  intolerable  burden. 

I  went  even  further  in  the  path  of  duty.  I 
acknowledged  to  myself  that  man  had  no  right  to  do 
evil,  and  ought  not,  therefore,  to  harm  any  of  his  fel- 
low creatures.  But  I  settled  down  into  a  state  of 
mind  which  enforced  no  other  religious  or  moral  obli- 
gations.  I  looked  upon  the  world  as  an  institution, 
which  for  aught  I  knew,  might  be  ruled  on  a  fixed 
plan  by  a  supreme  intellect,  but  where  minor  human 


156 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


affairs  certainly  were  ruled  by  mere  superiority  of 
intellect. 

At  that  time  I  suppose  I  had  no  clear  idea  of  the 
practical  difference  between  faith,  belief,  and  creed. 
Otherwise  I  could  not  have  dared  to  do  what  I  did 
during  the  last  public  examination  I  participated  in, 
at  the  school  where  I  taught.  When  I  reviewed  the 
religious  instruction  I  had  given  to  my  class,  I  ven- 
tured publicly  to  affirm  that  the  "  spirit  "  (or  intellect 
rather  than  faith)  was  the  victory  which  overcometh 
the  world. 

I  will  not  dwell  upon  the  mental  agony  which  I 
endured  during  that  period  where  outward  reality  and 
inward  conviction  most  flagrantly  contrasted  with  each 
other;  where  one  feeling  of  duty  urged  me  in  one, 
and  another  in  another  direction  ;  where  conflicting 
feelings  prompted  me  to  wish  for  a  change,  and  then 
again  for  the  permanency  of  actual  circumstances. 
For  some  time  I  tried  to  reconcile  myself  to  my  condi- 
tion, but  it  was  in  vain.  My  duties  became  more  and 
more  burdensome  to  me ;  every  day  I  counted  the 
hours  and  minutes  which  my  duties  required  me  to 
spend  in  teaching,  and  wished  every  evening  the  last 
minute  would  come. 

I  sought  gay  society  for  the  sake  of  losing  myself 
and  of  escaping  from  the  tantalizing  consciousness  of 
an  unwelcome  slavery. 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  157 

At  last,  however,  this  state  began  to  be  really  insup- 
portable, and  after  a  long  inward  struggle  I  burst 
my  bonds,  and  resolved  upon  leaving  off  teaching  at 
all  hazards.  I  had  no  definite  idea  of  what  I  should 
do,  after  that.  I  only  knew  I  would  not  be  a  teacher 
for  merely  worldly  ends,  and  I  was  not  and  thought  I 
could  not  be  a  teacher  with  philanthropic,  charitable 
and  self-sacrificing  views  and  feelings,  so  that  I  thought 
I  could  neither  submit  to  being  a  teacher,  nor  dare  to 
be  one. 

I  cannot  express  my  state  of  mind  in  any  better 
way,  than  by  saying  that  I  resolved  upon  making  a 
compromise  with  the  human  race,  with  the  outside 
world,  and  with  its  Creator.  I  would  patiently  bear 
the  burden  of  life ;  I  would  spend  it  in  a  harmless 
way  ;  would  not  require  and  claim  from  others  any- 
thing except  the  mere  permission  to  exist,  but  would 
also  not  allow  anybody  to  require  anything  from  me 
except  noninterference.  Thus  I  disclaimed  all  human 
and  social  rights  and  duties. 

The  causes  which  urged  me  into  such  a  resolution, 
were  so  weighty,  and  I  had  considered  the  matter  so 
seriously,  that  my  determination  could  not  be  shaken 
by  any  influence,  that  was  brought  to  bear  upon  it 
and  to  work  against  it,  as  soon  as  I  made  it  known  to 
others.  My  parents  tried  to  persuade  me  to  remain 
in  my  situation,  by  counting  up  all  the  outward 


158 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


advantages  I  derived  from  it,  but  I  told  them  these 
were  just  what  I  did  not  wish  for;  I  would  not  abuse, 
for  worldly  purposes,  the  business  of  training  dozens 
and  hundreds  of  intellects  and  hearts  without  having 
myself  a  heart  for  them. 

Further,  my  mother's  advice  of  settling  in  the 
country  I  could  not  heed,  though  now  for  reasons 
differing  from  former  ones.  I  was  now  willing  to 
give  up  city  life  and  city  enjoyments,  but  I  was  not 
willing  to  give  them  up,  and  yet  to  continue  teaching. 
My  eldest  sister  warned  me  not  to  grieve  our  parents 
by  giving  up  the  future  they  had  augured  for  me ; 
but  I  told  her  our  parents  would  not  require  me  to 
be  unhappy  all  my  life,  merely  for  the  sake  of  not 
acting  contrary  to  their  wishes  and  expectations;  they 
would  rather  see  me  made  happy  by  following  my  own 
convictions,  than  sure  of  being  unhappy  by  following 
theirs. 

There  were  very  few  other  friends  to  whom  I  com- 
municated my  resolution  at  this  stage  of  its  develop- 
ment, for  I  found  very  soon  that  it  was  of  no  use  to 
do  so.  It  was  too  difficult  to  make  any  one  fully 
understand  the  inward  necessity  which  forced  me  into 
this  resolution  without  revealing  to  them  my  whole 
mode  of  thinking  and  feeling.  And  this  I  did  not 
like  to  do,  because  I  thought  it  could  not  do  anybody 
any  good,  and  might  do  harm  to  some. 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY. 


159 


For  the  sake  of  carrying  out  my  views  and  plans  I 
had  now  to  choose  some  employment  which  would 
afford  me  the  means  of  existence,  without  laying  upon 
me  any  other  duty,  hut  that  of  honesty,  especially 
without  engaging  me  in  any  labor  directly  tending 
to  the  intellectual,  or  moral  improvement  of  man- 
kind.   But  here  many  difficulties  arose  in  my  path. 

The  laws  and  customs  of  my  native  country  make 
it  very  difficult  for  any  one  to  change  his  place  of 
residence,  and  still  more  difficult  to  change  his  occupa- 
tion. All  professions  and  trades  must  be  learned  in 
a  regular  way  by  going  through  a  prescribed  course 
of  education  or  training.  To  become  a  minister,  a 
physician,  an  apothecary,  a  surgeon,  a  veterinarian,  a 
lawyer,  a  civil  officer  &c,  one  must  have  been  at 
college  and  the  university,  or  in  some  particular 
institution.  To  become  a  merchant  of  any  kind,  even 
a  retail  grocer,  one  must  have  been  apprenticed  in 
that  business. 

To  be  allowed  to  settle  as  an  artisan  of  any  kind, 
one  must  have  been  an  apprentice,  a  journey-man,  a 
travelling-artisan  (for  two  years) ;  one  must  have 
made  a  master-piece,  and  even  then  it  depends  upon 
the  court's  particular  opinion  whether  there  is  room 
for  one,  whether  to  allow  him  to  settle  even  in  his 
native  place,  and  to  open  a  shop  for  himself.  Clerk- 
ships in  government  offices  &c,  are  usually  given  to 


160 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


officers  and  subalterns  who  wish,  or  are  expected  to 
retire  from  military  service.  Farming  is  hardly 
taken  up  by  any  one  who  is  not  trained  for  it.  The 
law  does  not  really  forbid  doing  so,  but  makes  it  very 
difficult,  and  then  public  opinion  does  not  think  very 
highly  of  "  latin  farmers as  the  country  people 
used  to  call  persons  of  a  liberal  education  who  took 
up  farming  without  a  previous  practical  knowledge 
of  it. 

On  the  whole,  public  opinion  was  apt  to  hold  in 
low  estimation  every  one,  who  gave  up  the  occupation 
which  he  had  chosen  in  his  early  life,  or  into  which 
he  had  perhaps  been  driven  in  his  youth.  The  only 
business  which  did  not  seem  peremptorily  to  require 
a  particular  training,  and  which  was  open  to  any  one, 
was  that  of  keeping  a  tavern,  i.  e.  not  of  opening  one 
when,  and  where  a  person  might  choose,  but  of  buy- 
ing, or  renting  one  of  those  hotels,  taverns,  inns, 
club-houses,  or  coffee-gardens  which  the  courts  might 
allow  to  exist,  (with  an  occasional  permission  of 
adding  a  new  one.)  Still  even  here,  public  opinion 
was  in  favor  of  persons  who  had  been  for  years  wait- 
ers in  hotels  &c. 

With  this  state  of  affairs,  I  found  very  soon,  that 
there  was  not  much  hope  for  me  to  find  another 
occupation.  I  applied  to  the  government  for  the 
situation  of  clerk  in  the  post  office  in  our  town,  where 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  161 


there  was  a  vacancy  just  then.  This  place  would  not 
have  yielded  me  half  of  the  income  which  I  had  at 
that  time.  It  would  have  made  it  impossible  for  me 
to  continue  my  expensive  mode  of  living  and  of 
enjoying  myself.  Through  this  circumstance  and 
through  its  own  social  inferiority  it  would  probably 
have  compelled  me  to  leave  the  "  first  and  best  soci- 
ety/7 in  which  I  had  moved  so  far.  Still  I  was  wil- 
ling to  make  such  a  sacrifice  only  for  the  sake  of  no 
longer  having  the  responsibility  of  teaching.  The 
situation,  however,  was  not  given  to  me  ;  some  one 
was  preferred  because  he  had  been  "  trained  "  in  that 
business. 

I  met  with  no  better  success  when  I  applied  for  the 
place  of  auctioneer,  which  the  government  advertised 
as  being  vacant  in  another  province  of  the  state. 
Afterwards  I  wrote  to  one  of  the  Grand-duke's  coun- 
sellors who  knew  about  me.  I  asked  him  to  procure 
for  me  some  situation  in  any  government  office,  what- 
ever it  might  be,  where  I  might  support  myself  by 
writing. 

This  also  proved  to  be  of  no  avail,  and  I  began  by 
degrees  to  become  familiar  with  the  idea  that  I  should 
be  obliged  to  leave  the  country,  as  I  would  not  con- 
tinue my  actual  business,  and  could  not  find  any 
other. 

I  knew  it  would  be  infinitely  more  grievous  to  my 
11 


162 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


parents  to  see  me  leave  my  home  and  country,  than 
to  see  me  change  my  business,  and  I  was,  therefore, 
willing  to  descend  into  any  station  of  insignificance 
and  inferiority  at  home,  rather  than  to  emigrate.  It 
would  have  been  preposterous  in  me,  at  my  age  and 
in  my  condition,  to  begin  learning  a  trade  according 
to  law  and  custom,  but  I  really  made  up  my  mind  to 
be  an  inn-keeper.  In  a  village,  a  few  miles  from  my 
parents'  home,  an  inn  was  advertised  for  sale,  or  to 
let.  The  evening  before  the  day  appointed  for  the 
public  sale  I  walked  home,  and  entreated  my  father 
to  consent  to  my  taking  that  place,  and  asked  him  to 
become  my  security.  He  would  not  listen  to  the 
project,  and  thus  my  last  hope  seemed  to  be  cut  off. 
I  think  at  least  this  was  the  last  expedient  I  could 
devise. 

It  occurs  to  me  I  forgot  above  to  mention  that 
peddling  needed  no  special  training  and  no  other 
permission  than  a  license,  and  it  is  really  a  fact  that 
I  looked  upon  a  few  peddlers  with  some  thoughts  .of 
myself,  meditating  whether  I  should  follow  their 
example.  But  I  could  not  seriously  resolve  upon 
doing  so,  because  peddling  was  no  regular  trade ;  it 
was  not  resorted  to  except  perhaps  by  half  a  dozen  of 
persons  in  a  whole  province,  and  on  account  of  small 
profits  and  poor  trade,  they  were  obliged  to  carry  so 
large  burdens  on  their  backs,  that  I  knew  I  should 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  163 


not  be  able  to  lead  such  a  life  from  want  of  strength. 

When  I  saw  that  there  was  no  other  alternative ; 
that  I  had  either  to  continue  my  business,  or  to 
emigrate,  I  resolved  upon  the  latter.  But  truly,  I 
did  not  resolve  upon  this  joyfully  or  willingly.  I 
had  never  before  been  conversant  with  the  idea  of 
existing  and  maintaining  myself  in  a  doubtful  and 
adventurous  way  ;  I  had  never  been  reckless  or  uncon- 
cerned about  the  future,  or  courageous  enough  to 
think  of  striking  out  a  path  for  myself,  and  calmly 
to  encounter  vicissitudes,  dangers  and  misfortunes. 
Thus  I  wished,  just  as  little  on  my  own  account  as  on 
that  of  my  parents,  to  leave  my  native  country. 
Still  as  I  believed  to  owe  it  to  myself  and  to  the 
world  to  give  up  teaching,  I  could  without  scruples 
resign  to  the  necessity  of  emigrating  which  seemed 
to  be  the  unavoidable  consequence  of  my  previous 
determination. 

When  this  necessity  was  to  my  mind  a  fixed  fact, 
I  had  some  difficulty  in  choosing  between  several  ways 
that  were  open  to  me,  or  rather  in  finding  any  way 
that  might  seem  to  be  practicable.  At  that  time  the 
discovery  of  the  gold  mines  in  California  was  of  a 
recent  date,  and  I  noticed  what  effect  this  news  had 
on  thousands  of  minds  that  were  as  unsettled  as 
mine.  Still  I  was  never  for  a  minute  tempted  to 
join  the  throng  that  hastened  to  the  Eldorado.  The 


164 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


rapid  acquisition  of  wealth  had  nothing  tempting  for 
me;  what  I  wanted  and  needed  was  tranquillity  and 
peace  of  mind,  and  I  knew  that  gold  could  not  give 
that  to  me. 

Australia  was  also  much  talked  of,  at  that  time  ; 
its  gold  mines  had  not  yet  been  discovered,  hut  it 
seemed  to  be  the  most  desirable  part  of  the  globe,  for 
farming  purposes.  A  person  could  in  no  way  be 
successful  there,  if  he  could  not  rely  upon  himself 
alone,  particularly  on  his  bodily  self.  This  considera- 
tion prevented  me  from  fixing  my  hopes  on  the  plan 
of  going  there. 

More  seriously  I  turned  my  thoughts  and  desires 
towards  the  West  Indies  and  South  America,  where  I 
might  hope  to  find  some  solitary  spot,  which  under 
the  benign  influence  of  a  mild  and  propitious  climate 
would  easily  afford  me  shelter  and  the  means  of 
supporting  a  frugal,  simple  life.  I  happened  just 
then  to  read  Indiana  by  George  Sand,  and  I  have 
even  now  a  lively  recollection  of  the  entire  satisfac- 
tion the  end  of  the  story  gave  me,  if  I  except  the 
attempt  of  the  lovers  to  destroy  their  lives,  by  throw- 
ing themselves  down  the  precipice.  Surely  it  was 
nothing  but  want  of  independence,  of  courage  and  of 
self-reliance,  that  prevented  me  from  going  to  the 
tropical  regions  for  the  sake  of  leading  there  the  life 
of  an  anchorite. 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  165 


At  last  I  fixed  upon  the  idea  that  a  person  might 
live  a  solitary  life  in  a  large  city  more  easily  than 
anywhere  else,  if  he  could  avoid  being  engaged  in  a 
business  which  would  bring  him  into  close  relations 
to  his  fellow-men.  I  resolved,  therefore,  upon  going 
to  the  United  States,  to  the  land  of  religious,  political, 
social  and  individual  freedom,  and  to  live  there,  in  a 
large  city,  without  forming  any  more  acquaintances, 
than  I  could  help  forming ;  without  taking  more 
duties  upon  me,  than  I  could  help  taking ;  without 
expecting  from  the  world  around  me  anything  for  my 
enjoyment ;  without  trying  to  earn  anything  beyond 
what  was  necessary  merely  to  clothe  and  feed  me. 
The  best  way  in  which  I  could  attain  this  end,  seemed 
to  be  the  employment  of  book-keeper ;  this  would 
not  bring  me  in  contact  with  many  persons,  and  would 
not  impose  any  duty  upon  me,  except  regularity, 
exactness  and  honesty. 

When  I  had  settled  the  whole  affair  in  my  mind, 
I  made  my  intention  known  wherever  I  was  obliged 
to  do  so,  but  I  received  no  approval  from  any  side. 
My  parents,  it  is  true,  gave  up  contending  against 
my  fixed  purpose,  but  their  silent  grief  was  more 
eloquent  than  serious  remonstrances  would  have  been. 

When  I  asked  the  consistory  to  dismiss  me  from 
the  State's  service  without  obliging  my  father,  or 
myself  to  refund  to  the  Seminary  a  certain  sum  which 


166 


THE  PROBLEM  OE  LIFE,  OR 


was  stipulated  for  such  cases,  my  request  was  granted, 
and  an  honoring  testimony  of  dismissal  was  sent  to 
me.  Previously  to  obtaining  this,  I  had  corresponded 
with  the  director  of  the  Seminary  concerning  this 
matter,  and  received  from  him  the  following  private 
letter : 

"  My  dear  Carstens, 

Your  letter  in  which  you  announce  to  me  your 
intention  of  leaving  the  school  (i.  e.  the  State's 
service  as  teacher),  has  surprised  me — not  in  a  pleas- 
ant way — and  also  our  inspector  G.  whom  I  informed 
of  it  yesterday.  We  both  are  convinced  that  the 
scJiool  has  had  an  efficient  laborer  in  you,  and  that  it 
would  continue  to  find  you  such  a  one,  if  you  would 
remain  faithful  to  it.  I  must,  therefore,  really  con- 
sider it  my  duty,  once  more  most  seriously  to  urge 
upon  you  the  question  whether  you  have  very  care- 
fully considered  everything  which  was  to  be  considered 
in  this  case. 

As  far  as  I  could  see  into  it,  you  allege  as  the  sole 
motive  for  your  determination,  a  want  of  internal 
satisfaction  with  the  efficacy  of  your  labors,  or — what 
I  suppose  to  be  the  same — the  consciousness  of  the 
incapability  of  realizing  an  ideal  which  exists  in  your 
imagination.  It  seems  to  me — allow  me  to  say  this 
— you  act  neither  reasonably  nor  rightly,  if  by  such 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  167 


a  feeling — however  noble  it  may  be,  considered  from 
another  side — you  allow  yourself  to  be  induced  to 
give  up  a  vocation  which,  as  far  as  I  know,  you  have 
hitherto  discharged  to  the  great  satisfaction  of  your 
superiors  and  of  the  parents  of  your  scholars. 

An  ideal  includes  the  conception  of  a  perfection 
which  needs  not  to  be  in  actual  existence,  though  it 
may  be  imagined  to  exist.  But  pray,  my  dear  C,  to 
what  mortal  is  it  granted  to  realize  his  ideal !  What 
minister,  for  instance,  could  ever  laud  himself  for 
preaching  as  our  Lord  Jesus  Christ  preached,  or  for 
being  such  a  pastor  as  St.  Paul,  or  St.  John  was  ! 
Or  to  take  for  an  example  a  vocation  of  a  lower 
order  :  what  watchmaker  could  ever  boast  of  furnish- 
ing, as  often  as  he  chose,  a  watch  of  an  entirely 
faultless  motion?  Does  not  also  the  apostle  who 
could  congratulate  himself  upon  having  worked  and 
effected  the  most,  say  explicitly :  '  Not  as  though  I 
had  already  attained  &c.'  ?  Now,  what  would  become 
of  the  world,  if  every  one  whom  the  relative  imperfec- 
tion of  his  labors  grieves,  would  directly  give  up  and 
relinquish,  on  this  account,  the  business  which  has 
been  allotted  to  him  ?  Our  activity,  if  it  shall  cor- 
respond to  the  principle  of  the  moral  law  which  is 
founded  in  the  nature  of  man,  must  be  regulated 
by  rules,  concerning  which  we  ought  to  desire  that 
they  should  be  the  universal  maxim  of  human  activ- 


168 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


ity.  With  great  and  decided  pertinence  says,  there- 
fore, a  noble  German  poet ;  1  He  who  has  done  enough, 
according  to  the  opinion  of  the  noblest  of  his  own  age, 
has  lived  for  all  ages/  Such  a  one  may  certainly  be 
satisfied  with  his  own  efforts,  though  he  himself  may 
feel  most  strongly  that  they  do  not  correspond  to  the 
ideal  in  his  head  and  heart. 

Herein  also  lies  the  truth  of  the  paradox :  1  The 
better  Christian,  the  greater  sinner ; ' — because 
nobody  is  more  distant  from  true  Christianity,  than 
the  self-righteous  who  is  not  willing  to  find  himself 
guilty  of  any  sin. 

But  why  should  1  give  you  still  more  examples  and 
proofs  of  a  truth  which  you  surely  must  acknowledge 
yourself?  Whether  you,  therefore,  can  justify  it 
before  yourself,  before  the  school,  before  the  children 
who  are  to  be  educated,  before  their  parents  &c,  to 
give  up  laboring  as  a  teacher,  merely  on  account  of 
that  feeling  of  not  being  satisfied  with  yourself  as 
such,  in  spite  of  the  consciousness  of  having  satisfied 
competent  judges  of  your  labor,  of  your  results — this 
certainly  deserves  to  be  weighed  very  seriously, 
before  you  carry  out  your  intention. 

Besides,  I  think  I  ought  also  to  ask  you  what  your 
good  father  says  to  it,  for  although  you  are  no  longer, 
in  the  common  acceptance  of  the  term,  under  the  con- 
trol of  parental  power,  still,  just  as  every  son  and 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY. 


169 


daughter  whose  father  is  living,  you  stand  in  a  filial 
relation  to  him  which  certainly  requires  you  not  to  do 
anything  by  which  a  father's  heart  might  he  grieved, 
or  offended,  or  filled  with  uneasiness  and  care.  You 
do  not  mention  your  father  in  your  letter  to  me,- 
which,  as  I  must  frankly  confess,  has  surprised  me  a 
little,  since  I  know  that  he  is  still  living.  Nor  do 
you  say  to  what  vocation  you  will  turn,  if  you  give 
up  teaching — which  at  all  events  ought  to  be  a  call- 
ing of  which  you  would  be  sure  beforehand,  that  your 
endeavors  in  it  would  correspond  to  the  ideal  which 
might  be  formed  of  it. 

I  should  be  exceedingly  rejoiced,  if,  after  another 
revision  and  investigation  of  your  motives  for  relin- 
quishing the  vocation  of  teacher,  you  could  look  upon 
the  affair  in  another  way,  and  could  change  the  reso- 
lution you  have  now  formed.  I  cannot  imagine  that 
you  would  find  any  cause  for  repenting  of  such  an 
inconstancy,  if  you  would  like  to  call  it  thus.  But  I 
can  very  well  imagine  the  opposite. " 

After  having  given  some  kind  advice  about  the 
technicalities  connected  with  the  request  of  being 
allowed  not  to  pay  the  stipulated  sum  to  the  Seminary, 
the  letter  concludes  thus  : 


170 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


"  Although  with  regret,  still  I  should  willingly  coun- 
tenance your  request,  since  I  should  be  obliged  to 
believe  that  you  could  not  act  differently.  But  may 
God  grant  that  I  need  not  do  it ; — I  mean,  that  you 
take  another,  a  better  view  of  the  matter,  and  that 
we  retain  you  as  a  co-laborer  in  the  service  of  the 
schools  of  our  country.  With  this  hope  I  bid  you, 
for  the  mean  time,  adieu,  and  beg  you  to  keep  me  in 
kind  remembrance." 

This  letter,  however  cogent  and  affecting  I  felt  it  to 
be,  could  not  make  me  waver  in  my  determination. 

From  the  people  with  whom  I  had  daily  intercourse, 
I  had  to  hear  various  opinions  about  myself  and  about 
my  intention  of  going  to  America.  Some  thought 
they  were  sure  I  should  soon  come  back;  others 
thought  I  was  born  to  be  a  teacher  ;  others  believed 
I  was  too  proud  any  longer  to  be  a  teacher  ;  some  sup- 
posed that  I  had  a  desire  to  become  rich,  and  that  I 
hoped  to  attain  this  end  in  America.  Truly,  they  all 
knew  very  little  about  the  state  of  my  mind,  or  if 
they  did,  they  could  not  appreciate  it. 

The  superintendent  of  the  schools  told  me,  I  might 
depart,  but  if  I  should,  within  a  short  time,  change 
my  mind,  I  might  return  ;  they  would  keep  the  situa- 
tion at  my  disposal. 

All  comfort  I  had  from  others,  was  that  several 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  171 


friends  expressed  a  hope  I  might  succeed  in  America, 
and  many  thought  I  could  easily  make  my  way  in  the 
mercantile  world.  My  former  teacher  of  mathemat- 
ics said,  I  could  go  West,  and  be  a  surveyor,  if  I  could 
find  no  other  employment.  My  landlady  came  one 
morning  after  a  ball  into  my  room,  and  after  compli- 
menting me  on  a  speech  I  had  made  at  table,  she 
added,  that  her  husband  said,  I  could  not  be  badly  off 
in  America ;  if  I  failed  in  every  thing  else,  I  might 
turn  to  preaching. 

To  notice  that  all  other  people  doubted  the  necessi- 
ty, or  even  the  wisdom  of  the  step  I  intended  to  take, 
was  a  source  of  great  grief  to  me,  and  a  thing  not 
easily  to  be  borne,  but  it  led  me  also  to  a  more  serious 
investigation,  and  finally  to  greater  confidence  in  my- 
self, and  to  a  firmer  belief  in  the  necessity  of  persist- 
ing in  my  resolution.  It  was,  therefore,  the  very 
means  to  make  the  execution  of  my  plan  less  grievous 
and  difficult  to  me. 

My  departure  did  not  need  much  preparation.  At 
the  end  of  the  winter  term  of  our  school  (March  1849) 
I  resigned  my  situation.  I  sold  my  piano  and  the 
few  articles  of  furniture  I  had,  and  thus  I  procured 
money  enough  to  pay  my  passage,  and  to  support  my- 
self for  a  month  or  two  in  America,  if  I  should  not 
find  some  occupation  at  once.  I  also  sold  my  little 
library,  not  only  because  I  might  need  the  trifling  sum, 


172 


THE  PROBLEM  OF  LIFE,  OR 


which  I  knew  it  would  bring,  but  because  I  wished  to 
get  rid  of  the  books,  which  I  thought  I  should  never 
desire  again  to  look  at. 

I  will  not  dwell  upon  the  feelings  with  which,  very 
soon  after,  I  parted  from  niy  parents,  and  from  other 
relatives  and  friends,  or  as  I  ought  to  say  perhaps, 
the  feelings  with  which  they  saw  me  departing.  I 
suppose  I  have  no  idea  of  what  my  parents  suffered. 
As  for  myself,  I  might  have  had  cause  enough  for 
being  overpowered  by  grief,  for  I  knew  that  I  gave  up 
a  great  deal,  and  did  not  know  what  fate  I  should 
meet  with.  I  did  not  expect,  and  could  not  believe 
that  I  should  ever  have  the  means  to  return  home,  if 
I  should  wish  sooner  or  later  to  do  so,  and  thus  I 
could  not  hope  ever  to  see  my  parents  and  friends 
again  upon  this  earth.  Moreover,  I  had  no  guarantee 
that  I  should  be  able  to  make  my  way  clear  in  Amer- 
ica ;  I  had  hardly  any  acquaintances  there,  and  pos- 
sessed very  few  practical  capacities  whereupon  to  build 
my  hopes. 

Still,  after  all,  I  must  say,  that  I  parted  from  my 
kindred,  my  home,  and  my  country,  with  a  heart  not 
so  heavy  as  such  circumstances  would  seem  to  indicate. 
Life  had  been  such  a  burden  to  me,  that  any  change 
whatever  could  not  fail  to  be  welcome,  and  that  I  had 
fortitude  enough  to  bear  up  under  the  pressure  of  the 
saddening  feelings  which  were  awakened  within  and 


RELIGION  AND  SOCIETY  IN  GERMANY.  173 

around  me,  when  I  thus  exchanged  an  apparently 
bright  reality,  against  a  dark  and  gloomy  future. 

In  order  to  make  my  narrative  complete,  I  ought 
to  add,  what  I  gained,  or  lost  hy  this  important 
change.  A  recital  of  the  principal  events  of  the  fol- 
lowing nine  years  of  my  life,  and  of  their  influence  on 
my  mind,  would  show  in  what  direction  my  religious 
views  and  feelings  were  developed,  as  well  concern- 
ing the  life  of  an  individual  as  concerning  the  princi- 
pal denominations  of  Christians  in  general.  How- 
ever, I  cannot  attempt  such  an  undertaking  at  present. 
So  much,  nevertheless,  I  know,  if  it  is  God's  will  yet 
to  spare  my  life  and  strength  for  sometime,  I  shall  try 
to  accomplish  this  task. 

In  the  meantime,  I  will  wish  that  all  my  readers 
may  he  graciously  preserved  from  ever  falling  into 
such  a  deplorable  state  of  mind  as  that  one  by  which 
I  was  driven  away  from  my  home  and  my  native 
country.  But  if  God  in  his  wisdom  should  allow  any 
of  them  to  be  thus  afflicted,  I  wish  them  to  come  out 
of  the  labyrinth  of  doubt  and  sorrow,  by  a  shorter 
and  less  rugged  way  than  the  one  I  have  been  obliged 
to  travel  for  nine  long,  weary  years. 


THE  END. 


CONTENTS. 

Chap.  I.    General  Remarks  on  Religion  3 

Chap.  II.    General  Remarks  on  Religious  Sects  24 

Chap.  III.    Reminiscences  of  Childhood  35 

Chap.  IV.   Boyhood  50 

Chap.  Y.   Youth  69 

Chap.  VI.   Early  Manhood.   First  Period  96 

Chap.  VII.   Early  Manhood.    Second  Period  123 

Chap.  VIH.   Early  Manhood,   Third  Period  139 


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